Chapter 153: I need you
Riker sat down at the edge of the cliff and looked down at the work that was happening. The settlement was growing fast and becoming something massive. There was a look in his eyes that he did not have all the time, the kind of look that showed he was deep in thought.
Silas noticed this and came to sit beside him. He observed the work as well with a smile. "We have come a pretty long way in a short time," he said, proud of what was done.
"No, no we have not, at least not me," Riker replied in a way that shocked Silas.
Silas looked at him. "Are you still bummed out about what happened with the snake and that man?" he asked, because he had noticed the change in demeanor after that. Riker tried his best to hide the feeling that he had inside, but somehow it slipped out because it weighed on him very heavily and he could not get over it.
"It’s not just that. I guess that was the wake-up call, but it’s been from the beginning. I have never been able to carry my weight well, so I do not see how I am added into one category of we.
I did nothing to help our growth, and even after that, all I am good for is laughs and giggles. I am a joke." He looked down as he said that part.
Silas observed his face for a few more seconds and then took a deep breath as if trying himself to calm down. He sighed and then rolled his eyes a bit. "You are pretty dumb, you know?"
Riker looked at him confused. He was outing his feelings right here, and Silas decided to call him dumb.
"Yeah, you are. You cannot see how much you bring to the table. The first battle against the calamity orc, you were mad crucial, as anyone could be.
You fought diligently, gave it your all, and made sure that you stood with us and ensured that we won that battle. You were there, you played a role, a crucial one.
To add to that, I would be dead if you had not come back and told Master Ren about me. You managed to get here fast enough to ensure that he could come find me fast enough, so you saved me. You ensured that I did not die," Silas said with a comforting smile on his face.
Riker frowned rather than smiled. He clenched his fist hard and looked even more distraught.
"I was also the reason that you were captured. If I had not been there, with your speed and your abilities, you would have for sure managed to get away even if you could not win, but you were focused on saving me."
"Because that’s what seniors do. I am there to ensure that you are safe, the same way that Master Ren ensures that we are all safe," Silas said and then leaned back. He looked at the sky.
"I also wish that I was capable enough to stand and be the one that does what needs to be done. To fight all the battles so that Master never needs to fight at all, but I am deluding myself.
Before it even gets to me, there is Remu and Ragna. The two of them are the strongest to be here, and I actually have double evolution already, and yet I can barely keep up with them if they went all out.
So you see? I can’t even contend with the strongest here, and I am wishing that I could contend with the Master, a crazy thing to do, right? But that’s not all as well. Master is a magnet of attention. He is special, and as such, even stronger people will come to work with him.
What do I do when that happens? Sit down and sulk? No, I’ll rise and keep my head afloat, pushing myself every day. Master Aren showed me what it meant to be an alpha, a leader that never stops growing and never stops protecting.
I want to be like that. I strive for it, and do you know how I’ll never get there? By believing that I am not good enough or not strong enough or not important enough, because I know for a fact that I am," he said and looked Riker right in the eye.
"You got a name from Master Ren himself. You are Riker, dare I say Crimson, and you have to live up to that name. If you feel that you are not good enough to be here, then do you know what you have to do? Become good enough. It’s that simple. Show yourself first that you are worthy of that name."
Riker listened to every word. He let out a chuckle, then he took a deep breath.
"I guess there is no room for sucking, only room for growth and getting better.
I’m tired of feeling inferior," he said and got to his feet. He looked at Silas.
"If a task comes up, can you please assign it to me, and trust that I’ll deliver."
"For sure, Riker, and with the way things are speeding up, all of us will be too busy to even rest in a few days’ time," Silas said.
Riker nodded and spread his wings, shooting into the air.
Silas watched him go and then let out a sigh.
"If only he knew what level of unique he is, he would be confident in every breath."
Riker shot through the air until he found Ezra. He flew down and landed right in front of her as she was talking to some lizardmen after a training session.
When she saw Riker, she dismissed them all and faced him.
"What’s the issue?" she asked.
"I need you."
"Huh?" She was stunned. "Uhm, sorry, I already have my mind set on someone else," she replied.
"Eh? Oh, no, no, not that, though it does hurt to be rejected when I have not even tried. I need you to spar with me and train me."