A Wish to Grab Happiness

I felt a strange paralysis deep in my head. My heart sounds strong, and I hear sounds all over my body somewhere, far away. There was such a feeling that the sensation of the body itself would somehow leave me.

"- Because that is a beast sent by God. It's impossible for a human to win. They're trying to win because it's a waste of effort. All we really need is to pray, pray, and ask God for salvation"

Such flowing, as if to mock, Arueno's words. The word slips through my ears amazingly smoothly and pierces my chest. He said he could see his heart rattling over and over again, but that's why, far away.

Arueno's words, which, perhaps, are true. Perhaps it is an undisputed positive word.

Whatever it is, that creature, the beast of the flesh mass, is clearly a thing that draws a line from the other creatures. If it is called the work of God, I see. I have to convince you of something, and even if it is once again said that it is the devil's malice itself, I can believe it. It's only true that it's not very natural.

The golden hair was loosened by the wind and crossed the edge of his sight for a moment.

"Rugis, I knew you'd be here. Yeah, I knew everything - that's why I led you here, and I gave you a stretch of muscle. So I waited here until you arrived."

My voice goes through my ears. My skin and fingertips, no, my whole body felt terribly cold. Every breath you exhale and every breath you inhale takes away heat from your body. Each time, the inside of the skull is dyed white. White, very white. Thoughts, I don't think, like I said there's no more.

Only Arueno's words were telling me how warm it was.

"Look closely, Rugis. The presence you admire and honor as a hero can only continue to roll honestly in God's hands. You can never go against it."

Kalia's silver sword was brilliant under her eyes, I could see. But as the silver sword tries to cleave the flesh mass and eject the blood, the flesh swells again during the blink, blocking the wound. It's like grinning at Karia, who moves her body diligently as she rocks her silver hair.

"That's what men call this, the path of God, destiny. In that way, destiny can never be defied. Yes, a hero, a brave man - hey, if you're nothing more than an ordinary husband, then you must be, Rugis."

My body, as if it had become ice itself, was terrible, cold. That's not all, even the deepest part of the gut, as if it had taken away the heat. I'm going to be cold, freezing, freezing to death. Truly, it's so cold that I've never felt it before in my life.

His back teeth were not overlapping but chirping and his lips complained of dryness. Exhale a few degrees. That was such a fine breath that I didn't think it was my own.

Hey, Rugis, she said the words, keep going. Soft voice, as if dreaming. And it was a warm voice.

"- That's enough. Let's give up. No, rather, you've done well. You don't have to work hard anymore. You don't have to be hurt."

A hand stretched from behind is tangled around his neck, and the exhalation in his ear is yes, I tell him. What a sweet, sweet temptation. Sweetness, the body, the heart and everything in the gut is going to melt away.

Dark white overlapped, as if I could see nothing, and, fu, some sight floated in my head.

That is an indisputable past scenario. From the once humiliated itinerary to the walled city of Galuamaria, to the aerial garden of Gaza, and thus to the mercenary city of Berfein. As all those scenes slowly float behind your eyes, they disappear.

Whatever, it seemed like this trajectory was scattered somewhere I didn't think I'd made it. It's a big deal, myself, it makes me feel like praising myself.

Well done, huh?

I see, that's true, there's no mistake. If this is nothing more than an ordinary husband, this must be a shining path. Excellent. Really, nothing more. When I think about my journey here, I feel like I'm still dreaming about it. It's been really, really fun since I got back here. Oh, those were great days.

Unexpectedly, he opens his eyes to the cold wind pounding his cheeks. Arueno's, white and fine skin was visible right beside him. My hand is stretched out to my chest, as if I were hoping to grip it back from here.

- Really, it's a good dream.

Should be forgiven. No one should blame you for taking that hand. Who is to blame for the act? Throw away all the blaming bitterness, flush them away with overnight dreams, and kneel, who.

From behind, my voice keeps sounding like I'm singing something. For a moment, my teeth, they rang. Slowly, open your lips. I never turned around. Under his eyes, Kalia's silver sword shines.

I made sure I chose the words, went behind my back, threw the words at me.

"- I'm sorry. God's destiny. He's too noble to talk about his hands."

The white arm that was circling in front of me, tickled and unnaturally jumped. The wind hitting your cheeks hard is as cold as ever. No longer, enough to even feel the pain.

But even so, the exhalation from the mouth is unnaturally hot. A frozen, unsound gut makes smoke out of its back. I could see blood running all over my body spitting out heat as if it were a flame.

Yes, even if I'm forgiven. It is everyone's right to be forgiven for throwing all the blaming bitterness to the end of his/her giving up and falling asleep on his/her knees. Yeah, I'm sure that was allowed to happen to me once.

But now you can't give me that right. Even if 10,000 people forgive me, can I forgive myself?

And he chose the eyes of a hero like the sun, and cut off the life of the king of the elves, and put his sword upon the neck of Karia.

- Strangle and kill the rats in you.

- Try jumping this sword. If it comes true, you are no longer an ordinary husband or a pebble.

Until now, this body is not free. Giving up, kneeling down, and despising yourself as an ordinary husband all become an affront to them. I will show more respect than my heart and apply mud to the presence of them who even have visions in their hearts.

How can you do that now? How can these breasts tolerate such a thing?

"... what's up, Rugis? Don't give me that word. Why don't you take my hand?

Every time that voice touches my ear, my heart is about to lean. The spirit is about to lack equilibrium. If I could, I'd look back now, and I'd like to hug that body, too. It seems paradoxical, but it is true that the emotion also exists in the back of this chest.

But it is.

"- Come on, give me a break. The woman I fell in love with, she's not as cheap as you. I had a good dream."

From the neck, I pulled that white arm off, and, yes, I said.