American Adventure: My Uncle is Don Quixote

[Task Reward: Free Attribute Points +0.1 (Can only be triggered once per month)]

One million USD in cold, hard cash for 0.1 attribute points. Li Wei felt that, all things considered, he’d come out ahead.

Meanwhile, the floating [Jester’s Skull] nearby flashed its ruby eye sockets and delivered a peculiar, sarcastic critique:

[Tch... An old-fashioned Royal City parlor trick.]

[To win the favor of those Minstrels, the noble Lord Knight actually stoops so low as to toss shiny Gold Coins into this stinking mud pit.]

[However... despite this being a nauseating political stunt, I must admit that this direct charity at least didn’t end up in the hands of greedy tax collectors. At a minimum, these mud-caked farmers’ sons, after breaking their dirt-caked legs, now have a second chance to pick up their pitchforks.]

[Keep up this false benevolence of yours, Lord Knight.]

Li Wei shook his head, offering no opinion.

The [Jester’s Skull] wasn’t mocking him for once, which actually felt a little strange.

Just as Li Wei found an intersection to drop off Jin Heon and was about to head back, Mark called again.

"Mr. Li Wei, congratulations on beating the Kansas City Chiefs over the weekend," he said. "Also, last Friday, one hour before final settlement at the New York clearing house, Julian used his exclusive digital key as a Senior Managing Director at JPMorgan Chase to issue an interbank intercept order within the system, personally blocking Miss Anya’s 50 million USD in bridge funds."

Li Wei just grunted in acknowledgment, saying nothing.

Anya had received news of it shortly after the order was issued.

"Mr. Li Wei, I have a solution," Mark offered his professional advice. "Since Julian used internal compliance regulations to force the interception, we can immediately team up with Mr. Sergey’s family lawyers and submit a full set of documents proving the legality of the funds’ origin to JPMorgan Chase’s highest compliance committee."

"As long as we initiate an expedited appeals process and apply enough pressure, it’ll be delayed by two months at most before the money is forcibly unfrozen. It’ll cause a bit of a delay, but it’s the safest route right now."

Li Wei laughed and rejected Mark’s proposal. In two months, Christmas would be long over, and Charles Mellon would have already achieved his goal.

"No need for all that trouble," Li Wei said, pulling out the USB drive Director Colin had given him. "Since he dared to personally sign his name and leave a trail, this battle is as good as over."

Mark was taken aback for a moment. "But as an MD, he has enormous discretionary power. He could easily explain it away as fulfilling his fiduciary duty—performing due diligence to protect the bank from federal money-laundering accusations."

"Remember that temporary freeze order from the Financial Crimes Enforcement Bureau?" Li Wei chuckled. "I got a USB drive. It has Mr. Sergey’s underlying asset piercing report, his overseas corporate structure, and the expected remittance path."

"An MD performing his normal duties would never have been able to secretly collect and compile such detailed, targeted dirt on someone through unofficial channels *before* the clearing system even triggered an automatic alert. Let alone hand that material over to a director at the Financial Crimes Enforcement Bureau and have him issue a freeze order."

"So, with this material," he continued, "we can accuse Julian of ’premeditation.’ The reason he forcibly intercepted the money was that he had conspired in advance to fabricate a crime."

Mark couldn’t help but swallow hard.

He knew, of course, what this meant.

It meant that with this USB drive, on top of Julian’s personal signature, he could be charged with "major financial crimes, including willfully betraying the bank’s trust, stealing client privacy, and disrupting the settlement network for personal gain."

"But, Mr. Li Wei," Mark said from the other end of the line, maintaining his Wall Street caution, "this would still be a lengthy legal process. If we report it to the SEC (United States Securities and Exchange Commission) or the FBI, even with ironclad evidence, given the efficiency of federal agencies, it would take at least three to six months to unfreeze the funds, open a case, and hold hearings."

Mark paused, his tone laced with concern. "Charles Mellon definitely won’t give us that much time. Julian can go to jail for all he cares, but the goal of freezing the foundation’s funds would still be achieved."

"That’s why we need to separate the two issues," Li Wei said. "First, Mr. Mark, I’ll give you the evidence. The first thing you need to do is compile it into a ’Risk Advisory Memorandum,’ send it to Mr. Sergey’s legal representative, and simultaneously send an anonymous copy to the current CEO of JPMorgan Chase, Jamie Damon."

"Jamie Damon is notoriously averse to compliance risks and scandals. To placate Sergey’s anger and cover up this extremely malicious internal compliance breach, JPMorgan Chase’s highest compliance committee will undoubtedly retract that interbank intercept order at the earliest opportunity, under the pretext of a ’system error’ or ’preliminary review cleared.’"

"Then, for the second step, we also need to send this evidence to the FBI’s White-Collar Crime division and leak a little something to the media to ensure Julian isn’t protected internally."

"This will take one to two weeks to play out," Li Wei said lightly. "But I’m confident the outcome will be good. It should be just enough time to deal with Julian before December, leaving Charlie with no time to find a replacement."

"I understand, Mr. Li Wei," Mark said. "I’ll get on it tonight."

Li Wei drove back alone to his apartment in Fortress City. Watching from the window as Manhattan gradually sank into darkness and the lights began to flicker on, he couldn’t help but let out a long sigh of relief.

Julian had finally taken the bait.

Now that Elizabeth’s problem was more or less solved, it was time for him to solve his own.

He still had no leads on the problem of the ancient Magic Potion.

His only hope was to see if Uncle Don Quixote would go sleepwalking tonight.

...

「Three days later. 2:00 AM on a Thursday morning.」

Familiar footsteps echoed from the room downstairs.

Li Wei’s spirits lifted. He quietly pushed open his bedroom door, went downstairs, and found Don Quixote wandering in front of the floor-to-ceiling window.

"Good day, Knight Don Quixote," Li Wei greeted him. "I am searching for a heretical Alchemist. I was wondering if you might have any leads?"

"Ah," Don Quixote said, turning around with his eyes still closed. "No wonder I smelled the scent of anxiety permeating the night air."

He paced back and forth, thought for a moment, then shook his head with some regret.

"Alchemists... I do indeed know of some clandestine black markets," he said. "While tracking heretics, I once heard of secret gatherings hidden in abandoned mines, midnight slaughterhouses, or underground water systems. It is said they trade in forbidden items beyond the comprehension of mortals."

At this, he paused and frowned. "But, while I know of their existence, I cannot provide you with precise coordinates right now, nor can I ascertain the specific whereabouts of those secret merchants. That would require lengthy tracking and a good deal of luck."

Just then, the floating [Jester’s Skull] at his side began to bob up and down violently. The rubies in its eye sockets burst forth with a blinding light, seemingly filled with utter contempt for Don Quixote’s suggestion.

[Hahahaha! Listen! Just listen to this foolish pronouncement that reeks of rusted sheet metal!]

[Is this Knight’s head stuffed with horse manure and moldy hay? To actually dream of finding a lost ancient Magic Potion in a mortal market reeking of money and cheap alcohol?!]

[Those rat-like merchants hiding in the gutters can, at best, sell you a few stinking lizard tails and some bogus hallucinogenic mushrooms!]

’Then why don’t you offer an opinion?’ Li Wei glanced at the furiously ranting [Jester’s Skull].

[In this age of depleted Magic Power, asking the living to find the secrets of the past is the most ridiculous joke in the world!]

[In a situation like this, you must, of course, ask the wandering dead! Ask the bones that have been gnawed away by the ages! Pry open the mouths of the dead in their ancient tombs! Only the souls forgotten by time hold the deepest secrets of their former lives!]

’The dead?’ Li Wei was shocked.

’Don’t tell me I actually have to go rob a grave?’