Ashes and Kingdoms

When I live in the Great Forest, I don't know, of course, how long it's been outside, nor how old I am. Farnayne took a gentle peek at herself as reflected in the small fountain and immediately shook her head and pulled herself back.

(I knew it, no)

I can't look straight at my tight face and sigh. At first it was creepy, nasty and invisible. But now, there's a slightly different reason to turn away. Because if you look at it, it's disgusting, upset your chest, and you know it's going to get rampant. To the extent of weeding, I still can't stop myself until I slap my fists and head hard against the trunk of a tree and I'm pushed into Igesa.

I kept doing self injuries over and over and tired of boulders. If you can't control a violent emotional explosion, you just have to keep the cause away from you in the first place. She hasn't seen her face since she made that decision.

He gave up and stood up, and also fell on the trunk of a tree that carved the mark of his back length. Even if you can't see your face, if you're tall, you can measure it this way.

(grown)

Even myself, one thing is definitely changing anyway. Farnayne was in a complicated mood, searching through every mark.

"Oh, my God, are you measuring again?"

Igesa shows up with a fun voice. Farnayne turned around and returned the inquiry.

"I'm going to overtake you. Because Igesa must be a dwarf."

Ever since my eyes were getting about the same height, I thought they would be. It's completely different from the Fidae tribe, and all the adults I dealt with when I was in the outside world were much bigger than Igesa.

To Farnayne's inquiry, Igesa clapped her shoulders and snorted.

"I'm not saying we're dwarves ourselves. It's called Avanes. You Teganus say things by your own standards right away, so you're in trouble."

"... Igesa, too, about us, dislike?

"I like you, Farnayne. Don't worry. I don't know anyone else, so I don't like it or dislike it. Yeah, but you've really grown tall. Tomorrow you'll be looking down at me from the top."

Igesa grinned bitterly, placing her hand on Farnayne's head. When I first met him, I could easily look down at that tweezer, which now seems to be a lie.

Farnayne knelt on the ground and hugged Igesa on her hips.

"All the time, I wish I stayed small.... Even when you grow up, you're a mother, will you stay?

"I thought you'd be happy to say something. All right, all right, I'm fine."

Igesa was grinning and stroking Farnayne's head, but she changed her expression there.

"Are you sure you want to be my boy? If that's the case, you'll have to see the other kids. These are the children who will be your brothers and sisters. Even so, I'm a little taller than you, so you don't have to be scared."

"... today..."

Farnayne snapped pompously.

(Brother Finn)

Fluffiness and name come back to the back of the brain. There's a name I couldn't quite get out of trying to remember.

(Confectionery sister, Mac......)

One nostalgic appearance after another comes up and disappears. Deep green eyes moistened, and puffiness and tears spilled. From Comris to Winnea and Tetna, the ship of memory goes back.

(Mother, Father)

Farnayne let go of Igesa and put her hands on the ground. Make a fist so you can grip the damp soil.

"No..."

Almost unconsciously, a small, trembling voice spilled. Sift and shake your head, no, repeat again.

(My family. Father, Mother, everyone forgets, no)

I really want to forget everything. Even the very existence of the outside world before coming to this forest. Hunger and violence, dark beast blue lights, burn pain, horrible men, all of them.

But memories, get rid of them, get rid of them, come back. I'm sure you'll never forget it. And there's something in it that you shouldn't forget. The memory of someone who was nice to me, the smell of a house where I was born and raised, the happy days in the village.

Igesa stared gently at Farnein, who had shut up, but slightly, slapping him gently on the back.

"Right, yeah, right. Everybody forget it. I think it's okay to be our kid. If it's okay to remember the old days, that's the best thing to do. But while you're in these woods, think of us as another family. It's time for you to talk to me about how old you are. The Fidae people look like completely different creatures. If you don't talk, you'll forget your words."

…………

Farnayne nodded silently. Actually, of course I'm still scared. Whatever a dwarf might be, I feel comfortable considering meeting someone other than Igesa and a bunch of them at a time as well. But I can't stay here forever.

As I said myself, she will soon overtake Igesa's back length. Over it, I'm sure it'll be higher. Like adults of the Fidae tribe. That way, no matter how much Igesa is a "kind mother," she is undeniably reminded of the differences in race. Every time I see you, I'll remind you that the world I belong to is not here.

Farnayne cursorily opened her fist and stretched her spine with her knees on the ground.

- From that day on, she regained a little bit of her original mouth count.

I also met Igesa's family. At first, one by two, eventually with the whole family and even relatives. Because Igesa included tough words, even Farnayne and her near-age children never looked at her face cursorily or threw insensitive words at her.

Instead they taught Farnayne all sorts of things.

About the food you can pick in the woods, the way you make and play whistles, the various old stories that are passed down to Eifanes, the history of the empire from them.

"You know what's out there in the woods, too?

The teacher was also surprised by the amount of facial loss knowledge, Farnayne was just surprised. Igesa laughs from the side and pinches her mouth.

"Unlike the people of Fidae, we're getting old just like the people outside, and we're getting good information about the Empire. The forest is huge for a bite, so I live divided over there, and there are some commutes with the clans that live in the mountains. The numbers are small, but the taller guys sneak into the city, too. So, Teganus barely notices us, but he looks at us from here on out."

"I didn't know. Um, so, you know who that guy is? Someone who was at the Fidae tribe before Igesa came to me. Like a little older than me, with a boy."

"Oh, Senato boy. Master Utier told me."

"Se...... na, t?

"That's right. I was originally with the lord of Nakute and this kid. He hid himself here when the Imperial Capital messed up. I'm talking about the Emperor's adopted son in the capital. The ship's starting to pop up in Orgenia, so I guess it's a little calm."

…………

Pokan. Furnaine closed her mouth and eyes round and out.

Son of a lord, now adopted son of an emperor? Does that mean you're a very noble man? Um, you brought me dinner, someone to talk to in a kind voice?

Blinks with the pussy, then, why, suddenly, blushes with fierce embarrassment. The girls beside him raised their chilled voices to Farnayne, who covered her face with both hands.

"No, hey, what happened!

"Do you like that person!?

Crazy, noisy girls. Even if Igesa tries, it doesn't work very well. All this seems to be a common phenomenon of all races. Furnains became more and more red when teased, shrinking, and answered with a mosquito-like voice.

"Chi, no. I'm just surprised... because, you know... Prince, I can't believe it"

He was the only one in the old story. The emperor, the lord - even though I knew it was real now, I thought it was people who had absolutely nothing to do with me. Even when I was aware that I was cute, the future I dreamed of would be, at best, to the extent that the city's rich would see me and get married.

(I can't believe I want to see you again, maybe not)

It seemed to me too childish and sweet a wish that one day he would come back to see me. That's just like a typical fairy tale, where a peasant daughter in the countryside is greeted by a prince who sees her and welcomes her to the palace.

(Wow, I'm embarrassed about what I'm gonna do)

They saw my face like this. With such a face, I sweetened the prince's kindness. miserable, pitiful, in the minute of a tiny kid who doesn't have one,

(I can't believe I liked you)

- Worst.

Even though my head knows that there is little chance of a reunion, maybe, and hope dances hand in hand with my dreams.

Maybe they remember you, too. He might care about the poor kid who was crying so hard in the back of the woods. Be emperors, don't be splendid and glittery, and maybe you'll come here again.

"You guys don't make a lot of fun of me. See, you're already turning bright red to the neck."

Igesa's groaning voice seemed to be heard from somewhere far away.

(If I do, what shall I say)

If one day I could meet that man who became emperor. What attitude, how do I dress and what words do I utter at that time?

(I want to be praised)

It brings my head when the long-forgotten desire swells.

I want to be praised. Instead of getting pity for you in a miserable way, you know, something - you're clean.

(You can't do it with this face... but you just have to figure out a way to deceive me)

Or at least, you know, you're getting bigger, you're getting better, that's all right. I want to be praised and answer with a laugh and a chest up against it.

(Thanks to you, I never forgot your kindness.)

Aren't childish dreams good? Nothing, I'm going to marry you into the palace, because I don't want you to.

At least once. Just once, I want to thank him properly and see that guy's face from the front without turning away.

Farnayne meditated her eyes all the time, pulling her lips together and accepting the pungent sensation of her face touching her hands, with pain. Like drinking a block of stone, without ignoring or refusing.

Drinking it down her throat all the time, she slowly lifts her face up.

"Igesa, I need a favor."

There was no longer a shadow of mourning and self-pity in the quietly cut out voice.

"I want to be a proper adult. Not to be ashamed to see you, prince or emperor. So, - please, help me."