Damned by Him

Rosaline waited.

For the briefest of moments, she allowed herself to hope that Xandros would say something...anything, that would explain away the scene she had witnessed at the Royal House. Even if the truth wounded her, she thought she could still bear it, so long as it was spoken honestly.

Instead, he only looked at her with those calm grey eyes of his and answered in the same steady tone that had never once betrayed his emotions.

"Nothing happened," he said. "That’s why I’m asking you what happened."

His words settled heavily between them.

Rosaline looked at him for a long while, searching his face as though hoping to find the answer he refused to speak. There was nothing there. Not guilt. Not hesitation. Not even the slightest sign that anything had changed.

Then, quietly, she laughed.

The sound was faint and brittle, more painful than tears.

"...I see."

She pushed the blanket aside and slipped out of bed, her bare feet meeting the cold floor. With slow, deliberate movements, she smoothed the wrinkles from her damp nightdress, refusing to meet his eyes again.

"There really is nothing," she murmured, her voice gentle enough to deceive anyone who did not know her. "Just as you said."

She turned and walked towards the door.

"If you’ll excuse me... I’d like to go outside for a while."

A small crease appeared between Xandros’ brows.

"Outside?" he repeated, watching her hand settle upon the brass handle. "It’s the middle of the night."

She remained silent.

"What happened, Rosaline?"

Still she did not answer.

"Where are you going?"

Not once did she turn around.

The door swung open, allowing a gust of cold mountain air to rush into the chamber. It stirred the candle flames and sent the loose strands of Rosaline’s silver hair dancing across her shoulders, yet she simply stepped through the doorway as though she hadn’t heard a single word.

The door slammed shut behind her.

The sharp sound echoed throughout the room before silence swallowed everything once again.

Xandros remained standing where he was, his gaze fixed upon the closed door. The frustration that slowly surfaced upon his face was one he rarely allowed anyone to witness.

He replayed the day over and over in his mind.

From the moment they had returned from the Royal House...

Nothing explained the sudden distance in her eyes.

After a long moment, he exhaled quietly and dragged a hand through his tied hair, loosening several strands in the process.

"...What did I miss?"

No answer came.

Rosaline wandered through the sleeping mansion without knowing where her feet were taking her.

The corridors were empty now, the bustle of servants long gone. Only rows of flickering candles illuminated the hallways, their wavering light casting long shadows over the polished marble beneath her feet. Every soft footstep echoed faintly around her, making the silence feel even larger.

Instinctively, she turned towards the corridor that led to Lily’s room.

She had always gone there whenever her heart felt too heavy. Lily would listen without interrupting, cry whenever she cried, and somehow make everything seem just a little easier to bear.

But tonight...

Her steps slowed before the corridor.

"Lily should be asleep by now..."

The words escaped as little more than a whisper.

Rosaline lowered her eyes.

She couldn’t bring herself to wake her.

Not after seeing that she had only recently recovered from her injury.

With a faint smile that never quite reached her eyes, she turned away and continued walking.

The mansion seemed strangely unfamiliar tonight.

The paintings upon the walls, the towering windows overlooking the mountains, even the quiet corridors she had walked countless times before...all of them felt distant, as though she were merely passing through someone else’s home.

Without realizing it, she found herself climbing the narrow staircase that led to the rooftop.

She pushed open the heavy wooden door.

Immediately, the mountain wind embraced her.

It swept across the rooftop with surprising force, lifting her silver-white hair into the air and making the damp fabric of her nightdress cling uncomfortably to her skin. Only then did she remember that she had never changed after waking from her sleep.

Her clothes were still wet.

The cold seeped through them almost instantly.

Tiny goosebumps rose across her arms, and a shiver passed through her slender frame.

She paid it no mind.

Instead, she walked towards the edge of the rooftop until the entire mountain range stretched before her.

The night was beautiful.

Moonlight bathed the endless forest in silver, while countless stars shimmered across the heavens like scattered jewels. Far below, the lights of the mansion glowed warmly against the darkness.

Ordinarily... She would have admired the view.

Tonight, she could scarcely see it through the tears clouding her eyes.

Slowly, she lowered herself onto the cold stone pavement.

She gathered her knees close and wrapped her arms around them before resting her forehead against one trembling hand.

The ache inside her chest refused to ease.

It was strange.

Her heart had never hurt like this before.

Not even when she left her childhood home.

Not when she discovered that her silver hair was connected to a past she could no longer remember.

Yet now...

A single image refused to leave her mind.

Xandros.

Standing with another woman in an intimate position.

Rosaline closed her eyes tightly.

"...Why?"

The question slipped into the wind before she even realized she had spoken.

Why couldn’t he simply tell her?

Why couldn’t he look her in the eyes and admit that there was someone else?

She would have understood.

Their marriage had never been his choice.

It had been forced upon them both.

Surely...

He had every right to love another woman.

Then why did it hurt so much?

Her hand slowly rose to her chest, pressing lightly against the place where the pain seemed strongest.

Only then did the truth become impossible to escape.

She loved him.

Not because he was the Duke.

Not because he was kind.

Not because he had protected her.

Somewhere between the quiet meals they had shared, the gentle way he reminded her to eat, the warmth hidden beneath his cold exterior, and the countless little moments she had never thought twice about...

She had quietly, foolishly, fallen in love.

A tear escaped before she could stop it.

It slid down her cheek and disappeared beneath her chin.

Then another followed.

Soon they came one after another, soundless and unending.

Rosaline leaned forward until one hand rested against the cold stone beneath her.

Finally, she lowered her head onto her arm.

One of the tears reached her lips.

She instinctively licked them away.

Salt.

She gave a small, bitter smile.

"So..."

she whispered into the empty night,

"...this is what a broken heart tastes like."

The wind continued to blow around her, carrying away the warmth from her damp clothes until her entire body trembled from the cold.

Even then...

She didn’t move.

A soft growl suddenly echoed through the quiet rooftop.

Rosaline blinked before looking down at herself.

Her stomach.

Another weak sound followed.

Only then did she remember she hadn’t eaten since breakfast.

She let out a quiet laugh, one filled with exhaustion more than amusement.

"I even forgot to eat..."

The words disappeared into the night.

The mountain breeze became gentler, almost soothing, rocking her silver hair as though trying to lull her to sleep.

Her eyelids slowly grew heavier.

The pain in her heart remained.

So did the cold.

But exhaustion was stronger than both.

Before she realized it, her breathing had evened out, her fingers loosened against the stone, and sleep quietly claimed her beneath the moonlit sky, leaving the lonely figure curled upon the rooftop while the mountains watched over her silent tears.

Rosaline stirred slowly.

For a few moments, she remained caught between sleep and wakefulness, her mind still wrapped in the remnants of the dreamless night. The pillow beneath her cheek was soft, and a warm blanket had been tucked securely around her body, chasing away the chill that had settled into her bones on the rooftop.

She frowned.

This...

Wasn’t where she slept off.

Her eyes fluttered open, wandering across the unfamiliar ceiling before slowly taking in the rest of the chamber.

The vase of fresh wildflowers resting upon the windowsill.

The neatly folded apron draped over the back of a chair.

Recognition dawned on her almost immediately.

"...Lily’s room?"

Rosaline whispered, pushing herself upright.

The blanket slipped from her shoulders as she sat on the edge of the bed, still trying to remember how she had ended up there. The last thing she could recall was sitting alone beneath the night sky, the cold mountain wind wrapping itself around her until exhaustion finally claimed her.

"...How did I..."

Before the thought could fully form, the door swung open.

"There you are!"

The cheerful voice echoed through the room as Christophine stepped inside, balancing a wooden tray in one hand with effortless ease.

"I was beginning to think you’d decided to hibernate until winter."

Rosaline blinked before a faint smile found its way onto her lips.

"Lily..."

Christophine crossed the room and set the tray down upon the small table before placing both hands on her hips.

"You certainly know how to frighten people."

Rosaline looked at her with quiet confusion.

"...Were you the one who brought me back from the rooftop?"

Christophine nodded as though it were the most ordinary thing in the world.

"Of course."

"You were sleeping like someone who hadn’t rested in years."

Rosaline stared at her.

"You... carried me?"

"I did."

A look of disbelief spread across Rosaline’s face.

"But..."

Her gaze instinctively drifted over Lily’s slender frame.

"...How?"

"Lily, you’re not exactly..."

She hesitated, searching for a kinder way to phrase it.

"...Strong."

Christophine raised an eyebrow before glancing down at the body she currently occupied.

"...You’re right." She clicked her tongue.

"This body is terribly disappointing."

Rosaline blinked.

"What?"

Christophine immediately cleared her throat.

"I mean..." She waved a careless hand through the air. "I didn’t carry you the whole way."

Rosaline looked at her curiously.

"You didn’t?" Rosaline asked confused.

"I carried you for a while." Christophine answered with complete confidence.

"Then I woke you up just enough to make you walk."

"You were half asleep the entire time."

Rosaline tried to remember.

She couldn’t.

Not even a little.

"...Did I really?"

"You did."

Christophine nodded solemnly.

"You even mumbled something about pastries."

Rosaline’s cheeks warmed.

"I did not."

"You absolutely did."

"I don’t even remember waking up."

"Exactly."

Christophine folded her arms triumphantly.

"That’s why you don’t remember embarrassing yourself."

Rosaline opened her mouth to protest, but before a single word escaped, a sudden tickle rose within her nose.

"...Ah..."

She turned her head just in time.

"Achoo!"

The sneeze echoed through the room.

Silence followed.

Christophine stared at her for a second before sighing dramatically.

"There it is."

Rosaline rubbed her nose sheepishly.

"...There what is?"

"You caught a cold."

"I did not."

"You slept on a rooftop wearing damp clothes."

Christophine looked at her as though speaking to a particularly stubborn child.

"What exactly were you expecting?"

Rosaline lowered her gaze.

"...I wasn’t really thinking."

"So I’ve noticed."

Christophine reached for the blanket and tossed it over Rosaline’s shoulders once more.

"Now stop sitting there."

"Go wash up."

"Get dressed."

"Then come downstairs."

Rosaline looked at her.

"...Why?"

Christophine stared back in disbelief.

"For breakfast."

The word had barely left her lips when Rosaline’s eyes brightened ever so slightly.

"...I’m hungry."

Almost on cue—

Grrr...

The quiet growl from her stomach filled the room.

Rosaline froze.

Slowly...

Very slowly...

She lowered both hands over her stomach as though she could somehow silence it.

Her ears turned crimson.

Christophine blinked once.

Then she burst into laughter.

The sound rang brightly through the room, genuine and completely unrestrained.

"Oh..."

She wiped at the corner of one eye.

"It answered before you even finished speaking."

Rosaline pouted.

"Lily..."

"I’m sorry."

Christophine laughed again.

"I truly am."

"But that was far too perfect."

Even Rosaline couldn’t help smiling despite herself.

She shook her head helplessly.

"I haven’t eaten since yesterday."

"I noticed."

Christophine replied.

"Which is exactly why you’re going downstairs."

She turned toward the door before remembering something.

"Oh."

She glanced back over her shoulder.

"By the way..."

"The Duke already left."

Rosaline’s smile faltered.

"...Left?"

Christophine nodded absentmindedly.

"He went out early this morning."

The room suddenly felt quieter.

Rosaline lowered her eyes, the warmth that had only just returned to her expression fading almost instantly.

Her fingers unconsciously tightened around the blanket resting across her lap.

He left...

Her heart gave a painful thud against her ribs.

For reasons she wished she could deny, a single thought surfaced before she could stop it.

Did he...

Go to see her?

The question lingered in her mind like a thorn she couldn’t pull free, and no matter how hard she tried to dismiss it, the ache in her chest quietly returned.