Chapter 59: Cannot Look, Cannot Smell, and Certainly Cannot Hold On
Si Jin stood frozen, his chest rising and falling slightly, his breathing much heavier than usual.
He raised a hand and roughly wiped his lower lip with the pad of his thumb, as if trying to erase the sensation that had made him lose control.
His deep blue eyes stared unblinkingly at Yun Sheng, his gaze a complex mix of emotions too difficult to describe.
There was the lingering, forcibly suppressed dark fire; the clarity and deep satisfaction that came from having his spiritual power soothed; and a deeper curiosity about Yun Sheng’s ability...
The change in his spiritual landscape just now had been too obvious, bringing a comfort and relief that seeped deep into his bones.
It was so comfortable that alarms instantly blared throughout his entire being, making him instinctively wary, even... afraid.
Yun Sheng’s ability was far more special—and far more... terrifying—than he had first imagined!
It was a fatal temptation, one that could make a person indulge, become addicted, and even completely lose themselves.
An ability that could so easily touch and affect the spiritual landscape of an SSS Dark Sentinel held a latent danger no less significant than any potential benefits.
’I can’t let this continue.’
’If this continues, I’ll be completely captivated by this comfort and temptation. I won’t be able to stop myself from demanding more, and something... something I can’t control will happen.’
"That’s enough."
He spoke, his voice painfully hoarse and laced with a cold hardness that came from forcibly composing himself.
Yun Sheng pressed her lips together, which were still tingling and slightly numb. She looked up at him, her eyes holding a dazed, watery sheen from their intense contact, along with confusion at his sudden stop.
Si Jin avoided her gaze. That look of dependence and confusion would only intensify the turmoil still raging within him.
"The demonstration... is over. Next, I will teach you how to truly use your spiritual power."
"How will you teach me?"
Yun Sheng took a deep breath, suppressing the chaotic thoughts in her mind and trying to make her voice sound as calm as possible.
Si Jin said, "From the very beginning. Your spiritual power is weak, and you can’t project it into a solid form. The first step isn’t to use it, but to condense it.
"Until now, you’ve been using your spiritual power based on instinct and scattered spiritual fluctuations, unable to form any effective force. You need to find your own spiritual power core and learn to condense and stabilize it."
"What should I do?" Yun Sheng asked.
’This really is my greatest weakness.’
"Sit down. Close your eyes." Si Jin pointed to the carpet. "Look inward, into your spiritual landscape. Don’t worry about how barren or dim it is. Find a way to locate your spiritual power and slowly condense it."
Yun Sheng did as he said, sitting cross-legged and closing her eyes, sinking her consciousness into her spiritual landscape.
Unlike the barren, dim expanse she had always perceived, her spiritual landscape now felt almost completely full.
It was occupied by a vast, brilliant, silver "river of stars."
That river of stars was formed from pure and immense spiritual power. Its light was restrained, yet it was vast and stable.
It was the power belonging to Bai Ye.
And in a corner at the edge of the silver river of stars, another power was coiled.
It was dark in color, its aura cold and violent, yet it gave off a strange feeling, as if it could contend with the river of stars.
This was the power belonging to Si Jin.
This power was much weaker by comparison, like a newly joined stream, far from the vastness of the silver river of stars. Yet, it emanated a powerful and dangerous aura.
These two external powers occupied most of the space in her spiritual landscape, squeezing her own already faint spiritual power to the point where it was nearly impossible to find—like a firefly in the shadow of a colossal beast.
Yun Sheng steadied her mind, trying her best to ignore the formless pressure and faint sense of rejection emanating from the two powers.
Following Si Jin’s instructions, she sank her consciousness deeper, using her mind to sense and search for the "specks of light" scattered across the lowest level of her spiritual landscape, almost completely obscured.
The process was far more difficult than she had imagined.
Sweat soon soaked the hair on her forehead, trickling down her cheeks and disappearing into her collar.
She felt as if her consciousness was walking a tightrope; the slightest lapse in concentration could cause it to be scattered by the aftershocks of the other two powers.
Worse, if she accidentally provoked them and caused them to release a noticeable fluctuation, Si Jin, who was right beside her, would immediately sense it.
’I have to be extremely careful!’
Si Jin stood quietly to the side, his gaze fixed on Yun Sheng’s face.
He couldn’t "see" the specific situation inside Yun Sheng’s spiritual landscape, but he could clearly sense that the spiritual power fluctuations around her were undergoing an extremely complex change.
Her faint but gradually solidifying spiritual power was emitting a strange attraction, tempting him to draw closer, to touch, to... possess.
At the same time, the space around Yun Sheng suddenly blurred and distorted, faintly outlining the silhouette of a faint, unidentifiable phantom.
But just as the silhouette began to take a nascent form, it burst like a soap bubble, instantly dissipating without a trace.
Si Jin’s gaze sharpened.
’Was that Yun Sheng’s spiritual body condensing just now?!’
Just as he was reeling in silent surprise, Yun Sheng suddenly let out a muffled groan. Her body, completely exhausted, went limp and fell backward as her consciousness plunged into a brief darkness.
Si Jin’s expression changed slightly. He instinctively took a step forward, his arms reaching out to steadily catch her falling body.
The warm, soft body falling into his arms delivered a much more direct impact.
A rich, indescribable sweet fragrance, as if a mixture of the finest flower nectar and the purest spiritual power, unexpectedly emanated from Yun Sheng.
Wisp by wisp, it seeped into his every breath, all-pervasive and inescapable.
It was so sweet it made his heart palpitate, as if it could stir the most primal, most avaricious desires from the depths of his soul.
The turmoil he had forcibly suppressed earlier was like a bonfire doused in oil. With a WHOOSH, it instantly engulfed his entire body.
"So sweet..."
Si Jin subconsciously whispered the words, his voice painfully hoarse.
His palms, holding her back and arm, suddenly grew hotter. His fingertips curled uncontrollably, digging into the skin beneath her soft clothes.
He lowered his head, looking at the person in his arms.
Yun Sheng’s eyes were shut tight, her long lashes damp. Her face was pale, but her lips, reddened from the exertion and tension, were parted slightly, her breath warm and faint.
She looked as fragile as if she would break at a touch, yet she exuded a fatally sweet scent that was enough to drive any Sentinel mad.
Si Jin’s breathing suddenly grew ragged. The heart in his chest, which had been cold and hard for so many years, felt as if it had been brutally squeezed by an invisible hand, only to then begin pounding violently.
’No.’
’I can’t keep looking, can’t keep smelling, and I definitely can’t... keep holding her.’
He had a premonition: if he held her for one more second, if he inhaled one more wisp of that soul-stealing sweet fragrance, his already precarious self-control would shatter completely.
’What would happen then... even I can’t predict!’
Relying on an almost cruel willpower, Si Jin abruptly tightened his arms, lifted the semi-conscious Yun Sheng into a princess carry, and placed her on the armchair to the side.
He immediately took a large step back, putting a safe distance between them.
His tall frame was drawn as taut as a fully-drawn bow.
He turned his face away, breathing rapidly as he tried to dispel the sweet fragrance lingering in the air. But his body’s reaction was honest and intense, and the physical response made his expression turn frighteningly grim.