Chapter 334
"......."
I opened my eyes.
A refreshing morning. As if by habit, I walked out of the department store lobby. May 4 had begun!
Calm weather, a calm day. In my hand was a rabbit doll, and in my arms was a silver coin, except its color had already faded so much it looked almost black.
But it was fine. May 4 was a good day. I was happy.
Even if I greeted it hundreds, thousands of times, it would still be a good day.
Of course, that couldn’t be true.
"Kim Soleum!"
"Hello."
Somehow, my client-entertaining counterpart felt familiar. Like I entertained them every day or something? Hahaha. Now we were going to the high school their daughter attended.
"Our kid goes here."
"Ah, is your child’s school right there?"
Perfect! May 4 was a good day.
After that, the “Counseling Teacher” who ran out of the high school sprinted toward the subway station.
For some reason, the Counseling Teacher felt welcome and familiar to my eyes. Like we’d known each other originally? Hahaha. But now, their back was even more familiar. Like I’d seen only their back for far, far too long.
I saw them off... no, I saw off the client-entertaining counterpart who was getting into a taxi and heading home.
The counseling teacher went down into the subway station.
"Please take care on your way!"
And I, holding my Americano, raised my head. On this wonderful May 4, I looked at those walking the sidewalks of Se-gwang Special City. I examined the everyday lives of the people I passed, one by one....
My fingers prickled.
It had been zapping like static for a while now, but it was bearable.
It was fainter than I expected.
The pain snapping from the coin made me feel like it ought to hurt more than this, but that was probably an illusion.
Because I’d never had an experience like this before May 4!
As if familiar with it, I took out the coin to check....
.......
It was pitch-black.
It didn’t reflect sunlight at all—it was pitch-black. It was hard to even call it metal anymore.
A filthy thing so grime-caked it couldn’t even properly throw off static.
Where on earth did I get this dirty coin?
...Wouldn’t it be better to throw it away?
"......."
I hesitated, then slowly put the coin into my pocket.
Because there was still, however faintly, a trace of silver left. Because there was no need to throw it away.
"......."
Let’s go home.
It felt like there was something I needed to do, but it was impossible.
A person can’t realize something unless the conditions are in place.
To raise my eyes and chase the glitter of the silver coin—to find the window reflecting sunlight, and head toward the high school—the coin had to glitter first.
If it didn’t, I had no reason to look at the high school window.
I walked home.
The cold drink made my hand cold.
And I passed the high school....
"Transfer student."
.......
"Pick up the note for me."
I froze.
I lifted my head.
There was no one in the window.
When I lowered my head again, I saw a familiar-looking white note lying beneath the wall.
I picked it up and unfolded it.
Just stay here
Please
"......."
I—
I folded the note. Folded it small, and then....
I put it in my pocket.
Because there was no one at the window.
There was no need to throw the note and send it beyond the window.
So this was reasonable behavior.
I returned home.
I took the rabbit doll out of my arms.
I made a spot for the rabbit doll with a blanket and a cushion, and placed it on top......
Even if I pressed its belly, it made no sound.
"......."
It was strange.
I didn’t know what was strange.
Everything was peaceful, and daily life turned over without any real problems.
The sky was blue, people were living well.
And I’d spent today well, too.
Now I would wash up, eat dinner, watch TV, and fall asleep.
What was the problem?
The world was normal. Normal beyond anything.......
"......."
I reached out.
When I took out the rabbit doll, something that had come with it was stuck to its back.
A crumpled note.
If I unfolded the page, the words written inside revealed themselves.
Just stay here
Please
I opened the drawer under the nightstand.
I took out a pen and scrawled into the blank space on the note....
No
"......."
I folded the note and put it in my pocket.
Then I kicked the door open and ran outside.
"Huk."
I ran until my breath rose to my throat. The roadside of Se-gwang Special City, with the sun going down, brushed past me.
Without taking a bus, I ran on my own feet an oddly long distance—three or four subway stops’ worth.
And I arrived again.
At Se-gwang Technical High School.
The lit-up Se-gwang Technical High School stood quietly in its place.
Since it wasn’t quite evening yet, the school was still in operation.
But every window was tightly shut. Warm light and classrooms were faintly visible inside.
"......."
I stepped through the front gate of the school.
Third floor. I would go to the place where the dyed-hair student who spoke to me had been, and return the note.
I didn’t know how I knew it was dyed hair.
But I would do it.
I walked toward the school building. One step, one step inward, the entrance drew nearer.
And so, when I stepped up to the high school’s front door and gently opened it....
There was no one inside.
"......."
The school was empty.
No students, no teachers, no security guard.
Only the indoor lights—falsely warm at a glance—lit the place. The bright interior, with nobody in it, exposed a chilling, hollow view of the school.
Frozen in the entrance, I turned my head.
Notebook paper was stuck to the front door.
Nap time
I staggered, pushed open the front door, and stumbled outside.
And when I turned my head, I saw the school still bright with light, still filled with the sound of students laughing.
"......."
It’s weird.
Weird, weird!
Let’s go home.
Not my studio—my parents’ place!
I needed to confirm it. I opened my smartphone and searched. Starting from Se-gwang Special City, a way to get down to Bundang... no, a way to get up to Bundang.
Right! I take the subway to Se-gwang Station, then ride the high-speed rail!
That would do it.
Yeah. Let’s go that way.
I checked the subway station near the high school. Then I ran down into the subway station....
.......
***
I opened my eyes.
A refreshing morning. As if by habit, I walked out of the department store lobby. May 4 had begu—
.......
"No,"
No, no....
No!
"...!!"
I burst out through the department store doors. I saw Se-gwang Special City, with pedestrians coming and going.
...As if familiar.
Wait.
I panted. Reflexively, I raised my hand and rummaged through my pocket, finding the silver coin and the rabbit doll.
The coin’s color had completely faded.
Pitch-black, as if dead.
"......."
Wait.
Wait....
Panting at the premonition stabbing through my head, I—
I’m sure, I’m sure....
Hadn’t I seen this coin when it was silver? So then, when was that.......
May 4.
.......
...Wasn’t yesterday May 4, too?
No.
The day before yesterday, too.
And that yesterday, too.
And the yesterday of that yesterday, too.
And the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of the yesterday of......
"Huhk."
I sucked in breath.
May 4... was May 4.
May 4, May 4, and then May 4 again!
What is this.
A nightmare, right? It has to be a nightmare.
Then how far does the nightmare go? Am I still dreaming right now? Or did I finally wake up and this is reality? I....
I pinched my arm like I was tearing at it.
"...!"
A sharp pain ran up my arm.
...It’s not a dream?
Then....
I snapped to my senses and ran.
To Se-gwang Technical High School.
"Huk."
My breath surged up to my throat. I rushed through the high school’s front gate. Then I sprinted to the entrance and grabbed the door—
"Hey, you!"
"...!"
I turned my head.
From the small guard booth near the gate, a security guard came running out.
"Show me your visitor permit!"
"...Pardon?"
"Permit! These days, because of safety issues, anyone from outside has to get permission to enter the school."
The security guard looked at me suspiciously, like what’s wrong with this perfectly normal person? Wiping my sweat-soaked hands, I answered as calmly as I could.
"I’m sorry. There’s a student I’m looking for. ...They dropped something."
"What is it?"
"......."
So.
"A note."
"What?"
They were about to drop the note. But that would be after the entertaining... no, but there was definitely something.
I had to check inside this high school... right.
"Um, could I meet the school’s counseling teacher?"
"What?"
A look like I’d said something ridiculous.
"The counseling teacher hasn’t been coming in lately."
"......Pardon?"
"No, I told you—they’re on vacation, so they’re not here. Why are you looking for them?"
...What?
"But... I’m sure,"
"Sure what."
As the security guard’s eyes shifted more and more like I was someone suspicious, I grew more and more confused.
Confirm... just once.
It felt like if I just looked inside the school once, that would be enough.
If I could just confirm there were lots of students inside, I felt like I could relax, sure that this was reality, and turn back.
So I kept darting glances at the school building....
And then I saw it.
A scrap of paper fluttering down from a window.
"...!"
I ran and caught it. Behind me, I heard the security guard chasing after me in alarm, but I focused all my attention on unfolding the note.
Because it was supposed to say “Just stay here,” for sure.
Stop it
"......."
I looked at the window.
There was no one there.
I came home.
I left the school as if being chased out by the security guard. It felt like it had nearly turned into a situation where the police would be called, so I couldn’t keep insisting on forcing my way in.
Because it felt like reality.
No—I couldn’t swear it wasn’t reality...!
What is this place?
Stifling, chilling, and a fear inside an incomprehensible calm pulsed inside my head.
I—what am I doing?
What is May 4?
Why won’t it end?
Right now... did it end at least?
I need to organize... the strange points.
Yes.
I picked up a pen. With my head throbbing, I整理 things. Strange points....
-Department store / why did I wake up there?
-Counseling teacher
-Note
-Silver coin
And....
There was one more thing that I didn’t know where it came from.
-Rabbit doll
I took the rabbit doll out of my pocket.
Instead of making it a spot on the nightstand with a blanket, I carefully—urgently—sat it on the bed.
Then I spoke desperately.
"Hey. Hi."
No answer.
"What is this situation? Do you know anything?"
There was no way there would be an answer.
So why do I keep asking?
"...Why won’t it work?"
There was no way an answer would come back from a rabbit doll.
"......."
I grabbed the rabbit doll tightly with both hands.
A soft texture met my palms.
That was all.
Somehow, it felt like something surged up inside my chest....
"......."
No. Then, then....
What about this?
I took out the note I’d gotten earlier from my chest.
Strange points.
"Um, I’m going to leave the note here, so if you can read it, I want you to read it. ...I’m curious what it means."
I placed the note neatly in front of the doll. After thinking, I rummaged through the nightstand and took out a pen, laying it down in front as well.
Then I turned away and left the bedroom entirely to wash up.
A strange sense of expectation rose.
Like something would change.
Since I’d put the strange points together, wouldn’t something uncanny happen?
And when I carefully returned to the bedroom—
I saw it.
"......."
Nothing had changed.
In front of the rabbit doll on the bed, the note and pen were exactly as I’d left them. I hurriedly unfolded the note, but....
Stop it
It was the same.
"......."
Something surged up inside my chest.
I picked up the pen and scrawled a reply.
No
I crumpled the note violently and threw it at the window.
Ting—it struck the officetel window and bounced off.
I ran over and unfolded the note again, but there was no change.
"...!"
I punched the window.
Bang! Bang!
I repeated it several times.
My knuckles bruised, and at last cracks spread through the window—then it shattered. Bursting shards embedded themselves in the back of my hand.
"......."
Through the gap in the shattered window, I could see outside... but nothing had changed.
Nothing.
Peaceful Se-gwang Special City, one slice of May 4.
Nothing happens.
"...No."
Something about this was wrong.
No—it wasn’t.
What should happen wasn’t happening. Why wasn’t the situation changing? Why? If I noticed it, shouldn’t something change? Shouldn’t it return to normal....
What is “normal”?
"......."
I sat in front of the TV.
Let’s wait like this. I won’t sleep—I’ll wait for May 4 to pass. If I wait until midnight, maybe something will change. I can do it.
I turned on anything on the OTT service.
A children’s animation played. I watched it. Watched it, watched it....
May 4 ended.
***
I opened my eyes.
A refreshing morning. As if by habit, I walked out of the department store lobby. May 4 had begi—
"Please."
I slammed my head into the department store wall.
But nothing changed. Screams rose around me, and guards restrained me and sent me outside the department store. I faintly heard someone watching say they needed to call an ambulance. I fled that place as if escaping.
Fear bloomed.
And yet, as if to calm that fear, the everyday scenery and my good-conditioned head made me peaceful.
This impure calm.
"Huk."
I came back to my studio.
The window I’d broken was fine, and nothing had changed.
The rabbit doll was back in my pocket. I frantically rummaged and pulled it out, gripping it in my hand. Just that gave me a strange sense of relief.
But the silver coin in the other pocket....
No—I couldn’t call it that anymore.
"......."
I dropped the coin onto the nightstand.
The coin was now so blackened there was no silver left. None at all.
I couldn’t even properly make out the shape of the pattern.
"...Ah."
What is it?
What am I forgetting?
I don’t know. I can’t get out. As if I must not get out—as if I have to stay here....
"......."
Should I just... stay?
Isn’t it possible to enjoy a peaceful, quiet daily life?
May 4 is a perfect day. Warm, clear, a day when I can take vacation and play. A day that’s happier because tomorrow is Children’s Day so I can rest one more day. A lively day because it follows the weekend.
I sat on the bed.
I would clear off the nightstand and make a spot for the rabbit doll with a cushion and a blanket. I would sit it there comfortably, and I would lie down peacefully on the bed, too.
I took the blanket and folded it. Like I did on the last May 4, this soft blanket....
.......
I unfolded the blanket again.
Something I hadn’t seen before came into view.
Something that stood out strangely, a detail of today that wasn’t all that important, a byproduct of my actions, and yet an element that caught my eye now....
The blanket’s pattern was a white lizard.
"......."
I turned my head.
As if I couldn’t let anyone catch me, I looked around, then looked at the blanket again.
A lizard.
It wasn’t a character you’d normally see on a blanket. With a white background and red eyes, an unusual color combination like this was even more so.
Even setting that aside, it bothered me in a strange way.
Like it was a symbol of something.
"......."
If I asked whose symbol it was—
.......
.......
"Section Chief."
"Noru."
My hand slipped off the blanket.