I'm still alive

As soon as the morning sun rose, it began to snow. The snow accompanied by strong winds came down like a snowstorm and swallowed us. The field of vision narrows and becomes increasingly difficult to move. I took the lead in front of the children, blocking the snow and wind, and steadily advancing in the direction guided by the female student.

I need to keep my body warm. I covered my body with a bag and a coat, so that my eyes wouldn't touch my skin, and the girl and the child covered their whole body with big clothes. The snowstorm was so gloomy in the mountains. Even though the morning sun rose, the temperature did not rise and the biting wind reminded me of Siberia.

The snow piled up to the ankles after half an hour. The girl, who was leading the way at first, breathed out a hard or rough breath on the snowy mountain path. The child was carrying a girl on her back. But I never brought up the idea of taking a break to see if I could read my mind. I sighed inwardly and waited to enter the hiking trail.

I finally saw the hiking trail. The moment I confirmed that the girl was right, I walked along the hiking trail feeling relieved. Then I moved a little more and when I saw the exercise equipment and sperm next to the hiking trail, I headed there. The pavilion with a roof that could block the snow and the vicinity were still.

As I slowly approached there and sat on the pavilion, the girl approached with a bright face and sat next to her. Breathing heavily, he put the child down on his sperm and wiped the sweat off his sleeve. It must have been very hard. When I looked at her without saying anything, the girl looked at her slightly and opened her mouth and said,

I've been here a lot....... I think I'll be there in another hour's walk.'

I nodded my head gently to show my positivity. Then slowly look around and watch around. I felt thirst and was hungry, but there was no water, so I swallowed my saliva continuously to quenched my thirst. Shall we eat snow? I thought about it, but I decided to endure it a little bit to maintain my body temperature.

Did he take 10 minutes off like that? I woke up without a word and the girl who saw it woke up and stood up.

And we walked along the hiking trail. Because of the snow, the shoes got wet and froze repeatedly. Increasingly, the wind began to ache and the vision was blurred by the snow. I hastened my steps, clearing the snow that clung to my face.

I saw a female student following me from behind, but I didn't have time to slow down or rest because I was tired. It's already a short year; it's hard at night. We had to arrive as soon as possible. Only confirmed from behind that the two were following with the sound of a child coughing violently and footsteps.

The sound of the wind and the shaking of the trees sound dreary. And I looked back at the voice that came at the moment. Looking back, the girl looked at me as if she was looking at me.

Then came the sound of words again. It's not my sound, it's not these two. I could feel my nerves on edge. I grabbed the two like instinct and ran beside the hiking trail.

I threw them on the floor and I leaned back. There was clearly a sound of human speech through the wind. The girl and the child next to her bent down, surprised to see if they heard the noise. The child closed his mouth with his hand and the girl began to tremble to the point where she could see.

I slowly covered them with fallen leaves and snow and hid myself. Hold the gun tight and check the state of the Supreme Prosecutors' Office. And I looked forward again. The voice is starting to get closer and closer and closer. I swallowed my saliva in tension and bit my lips. Now I can hear clearly.

A low man's voice. And a woman's voice. It was clear who the man was. But I didn't relax. In this hell, the boundaries of the monster were gradually blurring. The voice grew louder and finally the main culprit of the voice came into sight.

A group of shabby and dirty clothes pass the hiking trail. I checked the numbers quickly. A middle-aged man who looks a little older, a middle-aged woman, followed by two children and a bent old man.

From the occasional names and the names of their mothers and fathers, I noticed that they were family. But I didn't relax. The distrust that remains in my mind gives orders not to contact them. I look at the girl and the child and make a gesture to be quiet.

The student, who looked at me with a scared face, shakes his head and nods. As time passed, they began to pass before us.

Honey, are you sure you're okay?'

'Don't make any noise and follow me quickly.'

The middle-aged man was all up in the air. The woman, who looked anxiously at the scene, busily followed him, taking care of the children and the elderly. And at that moment, one of the children following behind said, pointing to the road.

'Daddy! Here's the footprint...….'

I thought I was going to miss it at the moment. Because of the snow, footprints on the side of the hiking trail remain on the snow. As soon as the child found the footprints, the middle-aged man flinched and stopped. The woman who was following him was surprised and took the children and the old man and hid behind the man.

The middle-aged man looked at the footprints for a long time with his eyes mixed with fear, then slowly turned his sights and followed them. Then he gently took a raw fish out of the bag he was wearing and gulped down whether he was afraid of it.

Cheap kitchen knife. The moment I found it, I followed the man and swallowed the saliva and held the gun with both hands.

Please just pass by. Please just go......... I recited constantly in my mind, but the middle-aged man was slowly following his footsteps and coming this way. Looking to the side, the girl and the child were shaking their mouths, not knowing what to do.

No one knows whether they have a favor or a grudge the moment they find us. It was obvious what would happen with each other's fears. Everything I've been through felt like I had given me distrust.

So I had to make a quick decision.

When a middle-aged man was walking on the ground, I grabbed a gun and got up slowly. And quickly pointed the gun at the man.

A scream came from the man's family. The scream was the screams that found and screamed at me. When the family screamed, the man, who was only looking at the ground, raised his head with a sigh and made eye contact with me.

Maybe I found the gun I was holding, the man slowly backed away and shot his buttocks. At that moment, the trembling wife approached the man with a small scream and instinctively moved the aiming time to the man's wife.

Facing the sighting, the woman fixed up on the spot with a gasp. He rolled his eyes and looked at the family and the couple. Everyone was looking at me with terrified eyes. I felt grossly dirty.

I just begged to go, but I ended up in this situation. I chewed my teeth and forced my voice and told them with a sharp, low voice.

'Get the hell out of here.

At the voice they looked at me with a shiver of fear. The middle-aged man slowly rose from his seat, and when I aimed at him again, he put down the knife he was holding slowly. And asked me in a quivering voice.

'......Are you a soldier?'

Then the wife, who was hiding behind the man, said in a small voice.

Ooh, can you help us?….'

'No.'

I bit my lips and shook my head small. And held the gun close with a silent warning. Then the man flinched and the woman screamed a little. Even though he was afraid, the man hesitated and opened his mouth and asked me again.

So how do we get a gun?….'

At that moment I read a little desire in the man's eyes. The feeling of desire that had begun to be seen from a moment ago, not from a soldier, made me feel unpleasant, though it was only a small scrap. I frowned around my eyes and then said in an unpleasant voice, with a wry smile.

Do I need to know?'

I had a startling mixture of hostility in my voice even when I spoke. The man backed away with a little moan, and the woman hid behind him even more and more and more. The children hugged each other and laid their eyes down.

I was not happy and just displeased even though I got the desired results. It felt like I was wearing an unbecoming dirty mask. And inside, I prayed that they would stand down well. I just wanted to get out of here quickly. I wanted to head to my destination.

'Get out of here, 'cause I don't want to make a gunshot.'

I laid down my voice more harshly, whipping my rumbling chest. And as if he could stab them at any time, he looked at any time.

Then the man quickly took his wife with him with a look of relief and fear, and soon approached his family and walked away from the corner of the hiking trail.

While trying not to make eye contact with me, I could see if I could do anything wrong. The man and woman began to peep this way, and the children looked at me with fear and quickly ran towards the couple.

I slowly lowered the gun. And at that moment, I heard a voice right in the moment.

'It must be hard.'

I picked up the gun reflexively, startled by the voice. Before my eyes was an old man following these families and the old man was smiling at me.

'Ha, Grandma!'

One of the children called the old man in amazement as he was near me. The voice startled the couple, too, and looked this way. Then he stamped his feet as if his instinct and reason were intersecting.

'Too hard, huh?

The old man was looking at me, slightly raising his bent back, even though I aimed my gun. It's like you don't know what a gun is. Faced with benevolence and laughter full of years, I lowered half my trembling gun.

The old man mumbled his toothless lips as I cleared the gun and looked at me as if he were looking at his close grandson.

'This is going to suck.'

The old man, who said so, took something out of his arms in slow motion and held it out to me. When I looked down and looked at it, there was a roasted sweet potato still warm on the old man's hand.

When I didn't answer, the old man slowly stuck out to my hand as if he were giving my grandson a delicious snack.

Guns and sweet potatoes face each other.

I lowered the gun completely. Then he reached out his trembling hand and caught the old man's roasted sweet potato. It was still warm. And the delicious smell stimulated the empty stomach. A piece of roasted sweet potato may have been burned to the ground, but it was such a precious food in this world.

When I received the sweet potatoes, the old man smiled and said,

'Don't hate people too much.’

And the old man looked at me without saying anything. Then, with his waist down again, he walked slowly toward his family, with a cane. The families, who were anxious because their grandmother did not come, ran toward the old man with a sigh of relief. And walk along the path that I have been walking with care.

I felt as if I had been hit in the back of my head with a hammer. I stared at the elderly and their families who were losing their minds for a long time. I felt as if I had confessed to God with all my sins. Shame, shame, and sorrow mingled together into a mudslide in my insides.

The back of the family, who takes care of each other, was like a routine before the end of the day. A look that you will no longer see, and a routine that will never come back.

I filled my eyes with the scene as if I were watching a famous painting of the past.

Then I saw them disappear from my sight and looked up at the gray sky.

The sweet potato in my hand was still warm.