Infinite Nightmares

Staring at the platters of expensive food he hadn’t ordered, just as Zhang Wenda thought he’d stumbled into a scam, a familiar voice rang out from behind him.

"Don’t stop, bring it all out. I ordered this. Tell the chef in the back to make me one of everything on the menu."

Zhang Wenda turned around and saw a familiar pair of toad sunglasses.

He stared in surprise at the fashionable young man before him, decked out in a set of bell-bottoms, a jacket, and leather shoes. From the beeper on his hip to the hairy black mole by the corner of his mouth, who else could it be but his own uncle, a man who seemed blessed with the power to get his way no matter what.

’I can’t believe I’m seeing him again in this bizarre world.’

"Uncle?" Before Zhang Wenda could even speak, the man reached out a large hand and ruffled his hair into a mess.

"You little rascal, why weren’t you home? If it weren’t for my connections, I never would’ve found you." He plopped down brazenly, picked up a pair of chopsticks, and started to eat.

"I had to go out for a bit," Zhang Wenda replied, his expression a little unnatural.

The young man seemed incredibly thick-skinned, not reading into it at all. It was as if he’d believe anything Zhang Wenda told him.

"Makes sense. You gotta treat yourself to a good meal at a restaurant every now and then. Borrowing money for meat doesn’t mean you’re bad with it, just that you know how to live. Everything all right at home?"

"Everything’s fine."

"That’s good." The young man chewed his food with gusto, but he didn’t swallow. Instead, he unbuttoned his shirt and pulled out a rubber tube that was connected to his stomach near his navel.

He then leaned over, put his mouth to the end of the tube, and spat the masticated meat and rice into it, letting the tube serve as his esophagus and deliver the food to his stomach.

Zhang Wenda was already used to this bizarre sight. Apparently, his uncle’s esophagus had been damaged somehow, so he had to use a tube connected to his stomach to eat.

"Oh, you got a cat? Good. At least with a cat around, you’ll have someone to talk to. Keeps you from being so quiet you couldn’t squeeze out a fart all day." As he spoke, the young man took the tofu soup a waiter brought over and poured it straight down the tube.

Since someone else was paying, it would be a waste not to eat. While wrestling with the cats for food, Zhang Wenda asked, "So, Uncle, what kind of business have you been into lately?"

"A country next to ours went bankrupt, so me and a few buddies have been running some business over there. It’s not the kind of thing just anyone can do, you know. You need connections, and you need face. And what do you know? Your uncle here has both!"

Zhang Wenda knew instantly that his uncle was full of it. He knew his family. You had to take anything his uncle said with a huge grain of salt; even then, it was probably an exaggeration.

Watching his uncle’s effortless, silver-tongued confidence, free of any internal conflict, Zhang Wenda couldn’t help but feel a pang of envy. His uncle lived so freely. It was he, in his past life, who had burdened him with unnecessary responsibilities.

’Now that I have a chance, I absolutely can’t be a burden to those who’ve looked out for me, like Teacher Rabbit, and like my uncle.’

After he had become a corporate drone in his past life, he hadn’t seen his uncle in a long time. The last they’d spoken, six months ago, the old bachelor had said he was going to Dali, Yunnan, to seek a life of "poetry and faraway places." He wondered if he ever found it.

Seeing him still so vibrant and full of energy, Zhang Wenda knew that this time around, his uncle could live it up to his heart’s content and enjoy the wild ride of his own life.

"Uncle, go on and do your thing. But we have a deal, okay? When you get old, I’ll be the one to take care of you," Zhang Wenda said with a smile.

"Hah, are you looking down on me? Me, need a punk like you to take care of me? By the time I’m old, I’ll have a whole legion of sons!"

"Heh, we’ll see about that."

After a bit of small talk, an idea struck Zhang Wenda as he watched his uncle eat via the tube. "By the way, Uncle, do you know much about my grandfather’s past?"

Now that he’d finally run into a relative, he was desperate to find out what his grandfather’s story was.

"Your paternal grandfather? What’s he got to do with me? I’m your *maternal* grandfather’s youngest son," the young man said, looking perplexed.

"Yeah, I know. But I remember my maternal grandfather and my paternal grandfather were really close when they were young, weren’t they? I remember hearing they were so close they might as well have shared a single pair of pants."

The young man waved his chopsticks dismissively. "Nope, you’re remembering it wrong. It wasn’t that they were so close they shared a pair of pants; it was that they were so poor they *had* to share a pair of pants. They owned one pair between the two of them, and whoever needed to go out got to wear them."

"Either way, they were obviously close. So you must know something about what my grandfather used to do, right?"

"Your grandfather?" The young man pondered for a moment. "I heard he worked in a factory. Didn’t come home more than a few times a year, though."

Hearing this, Zhang Wenda was immediately certain of his earlier suspicion. ’So my grandfather really was part of the Third Line.’

"Do you know which factory he worked at?"

"How should I know? Aiya, enough talk! Eat your food, eat your food!" The young man pushed the platter of chicken in front of Zhang Wenda.

Zhang Wenda tried to press him a little more, but he didn’t get any more useful information.

’It was clear that even if my grandfather was part of the Third Line, he kept it well hidden from everyone else.’

By the end of the meal, both Zhang Wenda and the cats were stuffed to the brim. They had truly eaten their fill, and then some.

Picking his teeth, the young man led Zhang Wenda out of the restaurant. "I’ve got business to attend to, so I won’t drop by the house. Tell my sister I said hi, alright?"

"Okay, I will!"

The young man didn’t leave right away. He thought for a moment, then asked, "So... is there anything you want to tell me?"

"If you ever run into trouble, remember to find your uncle. Your uncle has connections."

Zhang Wenda smiled and shook his head. "Really, there’s nothing. Go on, get to your business."

"Alright, then. But remember this: if you’re ever in trouble, find a teacher. Teachers won’t lead you astray. Oh, right, your uncle here has connections at the Youth Palace, too. If anything happens, go find a guy they call ’Rabbit Head.’ He’ll help you out."

Zhang Wenda was shocked. ’My uncle knows Teacher Rabbit?’

"Hey, you little brat, are you listening to me? You’re just a kid. If you really run into trouble, finding a grown-up is a lot better than trying to figure it out all by yourself, got it?"

"I know."

After his earnest lecture, the young man pulled a ten-yuan bill from his pocket and stuffed it into Zhang Wenda’s hand. "Take it. Belated New Year’s money."

Without waiting for a thank you, he departed in a whirlwind, just as he always seemed to do.

Song Jianguo snatched the ten-yuan bill and held it up to the sun. "Wow! I want a generous uncle like that, too!"

"Then go get your memories back. Once you do, you’ll know where your own uncle is."

Zhang Wenda snatched it back. Looking at the crumpled bill, he let out a long sigh of relief. His uncle had really saved him from a pressing crisis. With this money, he’d at least achieved lollipop freedom.

He gazed in the direction his uncle had disappeared, feeling that he’d been acting a bit strange today. ’Then again,’ he thought, ’that’s probably normal. Maybe there’s no such thing as a normal person in this world anymore.’

"Oh, right! I still haven’t bought the candy!" Seeing the sun already dipping toward the west, Zhang Wenda grabbed Song Jianguo and dashed toward the supply co-op.

Rushing frantically, Zhang Wenda finally managed to buy the three limited-quantity lollipops just before the co-op closed its doors.

Just as Zhang Wenda stepped out of the co-op, relieved that he wouldn’t have to suffer today, he saw a completely refreshed-looking 2826 standing before him. "I’m here. Where are we off to?"