Kuro no Maou

"Ha..."

Finally, I calmed down. For now, on the surface. I don't cry like an idiot anymore.

Instead, tremendous fatigue and tiredness weigh my body down. It's like wrapping a lead hammer around your body and jumping into the middle of the ocean, sinking deeper and deeper into the bottom of the water.

Your body stays asleep in bed. I don't feel like I can get up. I can't believe I'm getting any energy.

But when I find the pure white wings falling on my pillow, which are at the edge of my sight, my mind is quickly disturbed again.

"Nell... about me..."

Really, didn't you believe me?

Did you really, without any doubt, think I was the man who couldn't help but lay hands on a woman close to me? If I had listened properly to Nell about how I tried to do that, it was actually some kind of mistake or something - on the other hand, I think I'm so calm, my uncontrollable passion would go wild.

Stop it, it's ridiculous.

In the first place, it is true that I have offended Sariel, and it is true that I have enslaved him. Fiona and I have officially become lovers, and I haven't even held her yet because of my loss to Lily. Just walk hand in hand, that's all you need.

But there's no point in that fact. At the time I let Nell say that, it's clear he had zero confidence in me. It's only at times like this that Nell couldn't believe me, it's my fault.

Some mistake, some mistake, that's a convenient escape. Admit it, Nell didn't believe me.

"No... what you don't believe is me"

Wouldn't it have been "this is just a misunderstanding" if I had believed Nell wholeheartedly? Calm trying to hear more from her about what she was going to do, 'cause I might have kept it.

No, that's not too late now. If you go look for it, you'll find it soon enough. We should. I believe Nell, I listen to her sincerity.

"No, I can't... Ha, no pity..."

I'm scared. No misunderstandings, just like I felt, and I'm sure it was what I thought it was.

Even if there is hope, I can't bet on it. I don't have the courage.

"... ha"

Sounds silly, don't do it anymore. How long are you going to be feminine and worried?

I should have known you'd only give up once in a while like this. Such a misconception was a daily tea meal in the original world.

I'm just saying that I was just a little shocked because that's been in this kind of me for a while. There was no heavy misconception so far in the boulder, but still, the roots are the same.

Don't you need to despair? Nell didn't believe me. But I have Fiona. No, she's not the only one. Even Will would have found out about me and gladly given me a hand in negotiating kung fu.

I also have a lover. I also have friends. Even Sariel didn't have to kill him. All my wishes are fulfilled. Isn't that enough?

From the beginning, I just couldn't possibly be friends with a real princess. Even for Nell, this was good.

Now I may be shocked, but if you chill your head after a little more time, even Nell will understand what outrageous things you've mentioned. The spirit of self-sacrifice may be honorable, but if there is no reward to match it, it is only a pointless sacrifice.

If I was upside down there and I was seriously attacked... imagine that, and Nell would, I'm sure, learn a little bit more about the crisis against me, that's fine. If only you could take care of yourself more, that's fine.

And then there's that false friendship thing that I can find a little meaning in. So I don't resent Nell. Never again, I won't see you. But living in a far away world of royal aristocracy is enough for me to pray for her happiness.

Goodbye, Nell. Please, I sincerely hope the bad guys don't trick me or come near me anymore.

"Mr. Chrono."

I reacted so exaggerated that Bikun and my body really bounced to that voice I heard along with the sound of a knock that sounded like a cone, I'm sure, my mind would prove that I wasn't calm at all.

Oh, pity. I've thought about it so much, and I can't believe I haven't been properly self-contained yet.

"... Fiona"

"Yes."

There's nothing wrong with hearing her voice. Totally pointless questioning.

"May I come in, please?

"No... now, hey"

Even if it's not Fiona, I'm not in the mood to face someone. You wouldn't be in the mood, like you can calm down and talk to people.

"No, I'm coming in. Excuse me."

Whoa, that's really rude! The feeling never leaves the throat until ahead, and the unlocked door opens as a matter of course.

It was almost at the same time that Fiona, wearing the most familiar witch's robe, stepped into the room and I rushed to get my body out of bed.

"... what the hell, Fiona"

Unexpectedly, words out of your mouth are stabbing. Absolutely, I can't contain my emotions, unless I feel sorry for myself.

"I heard you."

"Right..."

I was naturally convinced for some reason that Fiona might be listening, rather than eavesdropping or what a feeling of blame. Maybe you asked Nell who left the room, or maybe he was really eavesdropping on you.

But if she learns the truth, there's no point in asking the means.

"I lost a friend."

"Right."

Because I knew there was no point in hiding it, and I was leaking that word so that even stupidity would be zero.

"I was close enough, I thought... that was my mistake, and you didn't believe me. But I didn't believe it either."

"Really?"

Fiona sits side by side in bed with me and gives me a flat hammer like always. For me now, that was too much.

"I don't think I can help it, but I'm still quite shocked."

"Yes."

"Hey, I cried."

That's the only thing that hurts when people hate you.

Will Nell hate me already?

No cursing, no contempt, just imitating himself, did Nell hate and hate me,?

When I told her to go home, she was surprised, she looked. Was it also a sense of purpose that you can't leave here? Somehow, Nell stuck. No, no, I felt like I was screaming for a word of denial.

I don't know how Nell feels. I don't know, but I don't need to understand anymore. My relationship with her ended here today.

"Mr. Chrono, can't you forgive yourself?

After how much silence, inadvertently, Fiona has asked.

"Oh, there was actually a better way to do it, even now, I think"

I have no more regrets for not killing Sariel. Now, I think that's good.

But the act I did to her... I had no choice, there was no other way, even if I knew so, but still, I have to regret it. Simply because I remember when I had Saliel in my hand. Remember, I haven't had enough of a mess myself.

Without that, just a little more, the consciousness of sin might have faded. I was definitely swallowed up by the madness of pleasure back then.

"Perhaps so. But it didn't."

"Yes, so there's no point in worrying anymore"

"Yes, later, forgive or not forgive, that's all"

Nonsense, it's a matter of feelings.

"You know, Mr. Krono is still unforgivable."

"Well, that's right, Nell, because you didn't forgive me."

When this happens, all the regrets pile up. It piles up high everywhere and presses heavily on my mind. My chest, it's painful and I can't help it.

"I don't need that woman's forgiveness."

It was a bit of a thorny way of saying things, like what you said about Sariel.

"Don't say too bad about Nell. It was a mistake, but be serious about her, show Fiona herself..."

"It doesn't matter. Not only that woman, I can't forgive Mr. Chrono, everyone hates him"

Such a one-sided shoulder placement is not a good thing. On the other hand, I feel calm, and honestly delighted, there was also a slight feeling in me.

"Mr. Chrono, I love you. Sincerely, I love you. So even if everyone doesn't forgive you or God doesn't forgive you, I forgive you. No one else, this, your lover, I am."

Gently, her hands can be overlaid. Is it my fault that I feel hot to burn rather than warm?

"Thanks, Fiona... I love you too"

I'm pissed off that I can only give this mediocre back.

Yeah, I'm already saved. I asked her, Fiona, to forgive me. I should forgive myself, too.

"Then love me"

"... okay"

Tough, Fiona's fingertips tangle.

"I will always accept you."

"No, but... I'm pretty sorry for me as a man right now"

"If you can't ask me at a time like this, there's no point in being a lover."

That, well, maybe... hey, all the embarrassment comes first. Why can't I be any cooler?

"Wait, no, really, I didn't mean this. Besides, I promised..."

"That's okay. Because right now, I'm next to you."

Lily's figure is behind her brain. But she mustn't smile at me. In hindsight, two beautiful pairs of feathers shine... only blurry, no longer visible.

"I'll always be by your side."

What I saw instead was Fiona's smile. A warm, sunny smile in the spring.

When did you get to have such a face? Or did you do it from the beginning? Either way. You just smiled at me like that, that was enough.

Understand. Finally, I can feel it from the bottom of my heart.

Fiona, she said she really, really loved me.

"I love you, Fiona. I want you..."

So I could finally kiss her from myself.

Once your lips overlap, you won't stop. Even if there was no fourth protection, I let go of my reason.

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