Evan looked worried to me when I vomited a word of denial that had not been preceded by feelings and had not been given guidelines and had not conveyed to me at all what I was denying even if I was saying it myself.
I take a deep breath to calm down a little, then I see Shed holding my hand and I'm forced to let go of my smiling hand and walk towards you, Evan. My body, whose blood has drawn me from head to foot chilled off, seems to be moving on a corpse or marionette even though it's supposed to be my own, and I can't feel my footsteps.
"It's all my fault. Evan, there's nothing wrong with you. Evan, you were just fooled by me."
"... I don't know, are you trying to shelter me? I'm just doing what I want, so there's no need for Mr. Felicia to get sick at all."
"No!
I immediately knelt on the spot when I got to you, Evan. And put your forehead on the floor. In short, the expression of apology at the top of the list, is dusty.
"Sorry!!
I screamed from the bottom of my heart. You still don't even know what I'm apologizing for. I can hear everyone screaming.
But I never listened to it, and I concentrated solely on you, Evan.
"Hey, are you... put your face up, please!
Evan, the wolfy voice, I disobeyed what you said, and I continued the conversation in the same way.
"It's all a lie, I was lying to you. Evan, what you've done is for me, but it's completely pointless and futile."
"Well, I don't know what that lie is, but it's better than that, so look at me."
Signs and voice proximity tell me that Evan crouched too. Evan, your hand touched my shoulder, but I said the words with my head down.
"I didn't want to be queen."
Evan, your hand stays on my shoulder, stops perfectly.
"Just trying to make myself happy is the best I can do, I don't want to carry the country and I don't want to marry Master Seth and I don't like the house and I don't like being aristocratic, so with all my self, I just ran away hoping!!
I shouted my selfish heart out, who ever asked me to relax and come without saying anything.
"What Liliana did was just convenient for me. So I take it personally that we were close to accomplices who didn't communicate without ever discussing it."
I can't say Lili wasn't bad at all for anyone. But even though I could deny it, I didn't deny the lie for my own sake. I must be guilty of the same crime.
Rather, he didn't even tell Lili what he meant. From some people's point of view, he made himself seem more like a heroine of a real tragedy, so even Lili is a victim involved. And even more so, it goes without saying that my sins are so heavier than Lili's that she made you sin for me.
Evan, who thought so much of me, spat a proper lie at you, and I've spent so much time without knowing anything. In the meantime, Evan, I never even imagined what you thought or did. Looking back sooner would have prevented it.
Evan, you gently pushed me on the shoulder, forcing me to look up slightly more abusively. That face is not the same as it was earlier, and he is staring me straight in the eye with a serious face.
You would be angry. That's right. I said something stupid without facing your serious thoughts, Evan. Because of that, you just acted as a righteous good man, Evan, and you've become a great sinner.
Evan, you took your gaze off of me, lowered your eyes and stopped moving to reflect on me with a daunting face, then you looked straight at me again and opened your mouth.
"... Is it also a lie that you said you liked Master Seth Cabot?
"… Yes. I rather hated it."
"... didn't you sacrifice yourself and try to make your surroundings happy?
"... Yes. Instead, all I thought about was being happy."
"…… so all, be as you wish, and you be happy?
To the third most difficult question to answer, I accidentally jammed my words. But there's no way I'm not going to answer it, and I'm going to put a beat aside and say the answer honestly.
"... yes, generally as you wish. I can tell you from the bottom of my heart that I was happy to live as a civilian even though I didn't realize that I had stepped foot at the expense of many things.... I can tell you, I will."
I managed to run out of words after my distress. When you were happy while making people unhappy, you did the worst.
Evan, I'm sure you'll find out now that you've done something stupid in love with such a disgusting woman at first sight, and you won't be able to do it.
"Good for you."
But contrary to my expectations, Evan said softly.
"It's not like you've been hurt, you're happy now. I can't be happier."
I'm good at spotting lies. Evan, you're not lying. I'm laughing at my thoughts as they say from the heart. There's not even a piece of anger there. No matter how staring you are, you can't find it.
"Why aren't you angry?!
I couldn't help yelling at your reaction like that, Evan, even though I knew it was an irrational reverse guile. I don't want to blame myself at all, I just feel good thinking of me, otherwise my heart was going to be crushed.
"Evan, you've been fooled, haven't you?! Believing it was justice for me, the next kidnapping of the queen was a big crime and I shook it on my life stick, and it didn't make any sense that I did all this?! Because of the lies I threw up in a mild way!!
"Mr. Felicia, you know, still, this is just me... taking it personally."
To me crying hysterically, Evan, you gave me a mild denial, like a forgiving adult.
"I wanted to make you happy, and I sinned alone. In your condition, you wouldn't have thought of making me sin, but I took the liberty of thinking ahead and deciding, and at the end of the day, you are involved in this way yourself. You're just my victim, too."
If. Yes, maybe if Evan had told me that it wasn't all your fault at all, I would have thought of something like Evan said that would have been a little bad for you, too.
But if you say that yourself, you won't forgive me for making such excuses. It won't be my absolution mark. The weight of what I did remains the same.
"You have no sin."
What you say is too kind and too beautiful.
Evan sincerely thinks I am innocent. [M] Even though he knows everything about my truth, he is willing to sin in hopes.
No... you can't be convinced of that.
"If I'm strong enough to walk on someone's foot with a fine face, I wouldn't have saved the country in the first place."
I should never have admitted in me that I had used the falsehood of prophecy to save my country, but it came out with a natural mouth.
"Because of me, for me, I'm not strong enough to let the kind people I know be guilty!! Evan, I can't live with a cheerful face that you and Shed have nothing to do with you being sentenced to death... even if you two wanted it, I can't stand that because I'm weak... ugh"
Evan gave me a troubled look at my appeal as if he were looking at a child who could do nothing about it. Soon Shed, standing next to you, Evan, looks at me with a similar face.
"Mr. Felicia is too kind."
"I'm here... if this is going to happen, I probably shouldn't have let my sister Felicia notice anything."
"Well, time will solve it"
"I hope so."
You two are such, nothing. Flush my appeal like it's over now.
I've never known anything that I couldn't blame was so hard. You think I'm sweet because you two are sweet. I'm not being nice. If you were kind, you wouldn't be able to betray the expectations around you, spit lies, and become a civilian. I shouldn't have spent so much time laughing.
Somehow, we have to do something. Even if you can't... you have to.
What I can do for them will be no different from what Shed was determined to do when he heard about it. More, I just had to do whatever it took.
I stood up and turned straight to one person on this occasion.
"Dear Nica,"
Calling his name in a plundering pitiful voice, Lady Nica turned to me silently.
This man told me one day to get in trouble. I know that it's important for a country like this to be involved.
Still, the only person I can count on in this room right now was Lady Nica.
"Let me see the king. Even though I know there's nothing I can offer you to hope for a commutation of my sentence, I can't drop you both off without doing anything."
By myself, I won't even be able to admit to seeing the king. I regret my self being a civilian for the first time.
"In lieu of anything, I have to save both of you. For my sake."
Nica told Evan that she wanted me to finish what I was convinced of. So I thought maybe you could make it happen.
This story must not end just because I do the heroine temptation of tragedy.
"I know how much civilians are asking the King to suddenly look at things that are impossible. But please...!
He bowed his head deeply and deeply, wishing strongly. There is no god, just Nica, even in my heart.
"Yeah, it's nothing else. It's Phee's favor. I will always fulfill your wishes."
I was about to cry because I was impressed and relieved by the fact that I received recognition and its kindness. Contain where you are and lift your head up once again and lower your head deeply.
- At the same time, I was just a little uncomfortable with that, which was too easily and instantly answered, because I have a dirty heart that immediately doubts people.
The light words must have made me feel as if I had just been returned with a predetermined dialogue as if in the game, because I hadn't been able to get out of the game brain yet.
That's how I'm trying to guess, and, uh, Shed's words passed the back of my brain. That's right, Shed said. There's more to this matter than I know. He said he felt like he was on the stage.
Speaking of which, I still didn't know who was Elle after all.