Me and Lili stood facing each other about ten steps away from the door and down the stairs. Even though it's a place for discussion, it's just a hallway, so I don't have a chair for you. It doesn't seem like it's going to be the kind of story you can sit in a chair and talk about for a long time in the first place.
Contrary to me being nervous, Lili even had a gentle grin instead of getting into the hard air. However, I get the impression that my eyes are not here and I am not even looking at what should be in my eyes.
Lili opened her mouth before I cut out the story.
"I'm not very familiar with this stuff, but is the lack of clearance when the door closes there still soundproof?
"Huh? Oh, yes. That's what Shed said."
They asked while pointing at the door that just came out. I answered normally because it was like a public discourse, and then I was wondering if I was willing to do something wrong if I heard a sound.
But the knife should be covered by Nana, and Lili opens her mouth again while she rethinks.
"You went back to your room a little late from me, Nana, right?
"Yes, you did."
"In the meantime, I thought about falling down these stairs."
……
I accidentally lost my voice.
... and you almost died before you knew it.
Right, right? She tried to kill herself twice with a knife, so she was distracted, but even if she fell, she could kill herself.
"As far as I'm concerned, I'm glad you didn't die... but why didn't you?
"'Cause then they might think it's another kill, not a suicide, right?
To Lili's words, which explain gently, I was poked in the void
... Lili doesn't want to die, she wants to "kill herself"...? I don't think it makes sense if they don't think it's suicide from around them...? What the hell for, why?
"I have to commit suicide. Because that's the last way for me and everyone to be happy."
So fluffy, gentle, but somewhere lonely, Lili laughed, haunting a fantastic beauty that even seemed unrealistic. I accidentally swallow my spit at the appearance of conflicting firmness of a strong and unshakeable will.
I now know what Nana meant by "Virgin" even to the point of thinking. Lili's thinking is too biased towards self-sacrifice, but I sincerely wish everyone happiness.
But I, at least I'm the only one who can never be happy that way.
"If you don't do that, don't die because I will make everyone happier than that!!
I cut it without any thought. It was a foolish cry, whether thoughts were lacking or not, that you would not mind if you explored ways later and did as it turns out.
Lili suddenly screamed at me. That was self-derision again. So I knew I had failed before I could hear her coming back.
"Really, you're crazy.... No, I guess I should say it seems. Whatever you think, I'm happiest to die right now."
"... why does Liliana, who is engaged to Seth the way she wants and becomes the next queen, seem so spicy to live when everything should have gone the way she wanted?
Lili, who heard my words, looked stuck in a response for a moment. To see her with a bitter look on her face, again, I feel like I have the wrong word to say.
But I can't figure out why I look like that. It's like I can't see what I can do to save Lili.
"Yeah, to you... I guess that's what I look like. But I didn't do everything I wanted."
The smile Lili brings to mind is self-derision after all.
"Everything, everything, one thing, because I didn't do what I wanted."
Lili's clear purple eyes shake like crying. In Lili's words, it became clear that I had been decisively mistaken to recognize her.
But it doesn't fall to my heart. Because Lili wanted to be queen, and then she wanted to marry Seth, and that's why she set me up. 'Cause there's got to be no reason for her to lie about being harassed by me otherwise. But Lili said not a single one went well. In other words, they were not her purpose in the first place.
No, but if so, Lili... did you want to be a civilian just like me? But if you don't know the game, you can't possibly understand that the end of that bullying is the punishment of being stripped of his identity as a nobleman and corrupted by civilians. Most importantly, there was certainly jealousy for me in her expression when she was harassing me. Exactly like Liliana Innocey in the game. If it was about wanting to be a civilian, you wouldn't be jealous of me.
Then why... am I missing something...? What the hell...?
"What is that,"
"Why should I answer all the questions from you that I hate so much?
Now it was my turn to get stuck in words. If they say so, there is no word to give it back. Lili is not like a sweet Shed to me.
... Lili says suicide can make you happiest yourself. If I was temporarily stopped from doing that, and I don't understand one factor of her misfortune and you can't tell me, how can I do something about it? Doesn't that just increase the amount of time you suffer while you live to mischief?
Could it be for Lili if I let her die now? Isn't it kindness to drop him off...?
But... I, uh...
No, I don't want to.
I'm selfish, unlike Lili, and I just think about myself, so, I mean, I don't want you to die.
I hope you won't make me regret this any longer. 'Cause I'm sure she hasn't done this if I had chosen a different path.
I knew well over the game that Lili wasn't really a bad girl. Yet I used it because I wanted to be a civilian. As a result, I can't believe she killed herself in the end.
"... why do you look like you're about to cry? That's sweet of you. I know, though."
No. No, no, no, no, no!!
Everybody, don't make me a nice person. Gentle, it hurts like my heart gets stabbed every time someone tells me to be really nice.
I can't die for someone like Shed or Evan or Lili. I can't sacrifice my life.
"You're in trouble, now... but I don't think we have a choice. There's no way I could have moved Lady Rose the way I wanted from the beginning."
Lili, who sighed with a worried, giving up look, smiled so that she could only do it a little as to labor me, before slipping away from her gaze.
"Now, Lady Rose, let's end this conversation. Please, don't be sad if I die."
"Wait. Wait, wait, wait."
Leaving me with a pitiful voice to chase, Lili walks straight one step and two toward the door. I had a sixth sense that Lili would really be dead if I couldn't stop her now. So I really want to stop, but I have to, but I can't find the answer to what to say on that back.
At the end of the day Lili rang me with a slight look back and a frown, even from behind my air, which was about to cry with a sad face like a victim.
"It's okay, Lady Rose. You are the protagonist, so when one villain leaves, the story will still continue for you. Be happy."
"Protagonist"? "Villain"?... "Story" for me?
There's no reason for that.
Consolidating all the information I've ever had, there was no other element of suspicion that she was "yes" than that dialogue at the end of Lili.
But if the possibility of being able to stop her is also a shard there.
I said to Lili, who had not hesitated to go to the door, a word she had never uttered since she came to this world, with the thought of slamming it on the yarn that was about to be cut off at the end.
"Hey, Lili, you know what" Redemption Lady Rose "is?
Her uncanny hand stopped.