Life, Once Again!

“Let's deal with it that way, yeah. Good work. Dinner? It's time already. I'll have a drink with you. I'll deal with it myself. ”

Joon-min lowered her phone and pressed her glabella a little harder. I felt like lead because I haven't slept in days. I leaned back to the chair for a moment and looked at the clock. 5: 49 p.m. It was time to settle the evening. I thought about going home and getting something to eat, but I don't think I'll be able to drive my car home. I left the office with my wallet. After a short greeting with the on-call managers, I went to a kimbob restaurant in front of the company.

“Would you like some tuna steamed rice? ”

As soon as I saw her face, she said. Joon-min nodded and sat down. In those days, when I wore shabby clothes, I once made a commitment to eat world delicacies every day when the number of zeros on my account exceeded 10 digits, but I now love kimbap in front of the company. You can go to a building restaurant, but if you decide without thinking about it, it's always kimbap.

I watched the TV on the shelf while eating tuna steamed rice in a light miso soup. I carefully compare images with actors in my head. By the time a plausible business plan came into existence, Jun-min had his head blown off. This is a professional disease. I want to focus on forgetting everything and eating just as much as I want to eat, but when there is a TV or radio nearby, the stream of thought naturally flows towards the entertainment scene.

“Thank you for your meal. ”

“Go ahead.”

I feel like I'm leaving home. Nowadays, people keep saying, "Are you really not getting married around here?" I'm tired of giving up what a fifty year old man called marriage.

I came back to the office, took off my shoes and lay down on the couch. I am managing consistently, but I feel decreased health every year. Let's quit smoking, thinking about it, Joon-min asked for a cigarette in her mouth. I'll never cut you off.

I put a cigarette in the tail of my mouth and looked at my laptop while smoking for a short time. There are numerous emails about the advertisement. Despite the amount of emails primarily filed by the Director, there are over 40 of them. It is mostly an advertising inquiry that has come to Suyeon. In the next few days, there was no shortage of roots and bullies.

“These guys will be here soon. ”

Right now, Su-yeon is the face of JA production, but she thought it would change soon. Joon-min has dug up and raised several actors who are called "inner actors." But now they're not under JA's name. The relationship remained good, but Jun-min did not choose them. Roots, Kanghwan, Suyeon. And now growing foreign actors. Jun-min put them in JA's arms. One that is not one of the best, but an irreplaceable one, Jun-min has secured the way for JA to go.

Maybe it was a dream, but Jun-min wanted it to be. It is because it is the only atonement he can make.

Jun-min took her cell phone out of her arms. The light of the mobile phone crystal floods the office with dark water. I moved my finger a few times to load the photo album. A few clicks on the submit button filled the old photos with liquid crystals. Joon-min expanded one of them. I'm standing next to Haeju, who looks like a crook. Joon-min smiled as she looked at the past self who was helpless.

A cell phone album is a treasure island you can visit at any time. There is no need to get lost, and no need to cross the harsh waves to find treasures that cannot be compared to anything else in the world. Joon-min glanced at Hae Hae's smiling face with his thumb.

“If I were alive, would I have married? ”

When will I confess, the voice of the one speaking in whispers resonates in my ears. Joon-min remembered two regrets that changed his life. One was to make a promise to Haeju on the rainy day, and the other was to not answer this shy question. If either of them acted differently, his fate would have changed.

Jun-min looked back at his office. Thirty years old, an anonymous actor who had nothing accomplished all this. Ironically, death has brought about an overall change in life, and it has become a driving force for success. Maybe that's why, when Joon-min sees this company and the building made after Hae's name, he sometimes gets nauseous. It was not once or twice that I wanted to turn my back on the idea that it was a skyscraper that put someone else's life at risk. Whenever I did that, Joon-min stopped by herself. Running away now makes Haji's death meaningless.

‘Yes, it's a self-defense and an excuse. ’

In retrospect, it was the life of a dream: 100 people together, 100 dramas unfold, but how many truly live a dramatic life? Most of them are on the rails that society wants. Along a narrow railway line, you'll find a few opportunities to call it a inflection point, but that doesn't change the fact that you're on a very common railway line. Until I met Hae, I was also moving along the normal route. After meeting her, I doubted the railroad, stopped, and eventually escaped. The beginning point of the variation was clear.

“Where do I go now? ”

The goal is still clear. Raising actors like Chonghae. I doubt there are any actors who look like her, but those who are growing up below still contain possibilities.

Joon-min, who was looking at the blank picture, felt a blur in her eyes for a moment. I feel tired. Should I go to sleep like this? When I opened my eyes again with a deep sigh, Joon-min had to feel a tingling sensation.

She got up and looked at the desk in front of her. I think I saw a desk just like this one day.

‘What are you thinking. ’

Of course you did. We watch it here together every day. But there seems to be a subtle difference. I think it used to be more red. Joon-min used to do dry cleaning. Stupid things can't lead to a right accident. I opened the refrigerator door, feeling the senses rising, even though the lack of sleep was so frightening. As I take a sip of cold water and turn around, I feel a heavy headache.

At the same time, I saw the landscape change spontaneously. I wanted the blueton office to turn gray, but at some point it turned into a very general company office. I see myself checking the computer with a document and a dull face. No, should I say I can see it? I feel like I'm reminded of what happened a long time ago. Hallucinations? Do you think something's wrong with his head? Maybe it's a red flag from my body telling me to quit smoking.

I sat on the couch holding my head. The landscape was still changing. I also saw myself working in free clothing, and I could see myself running in a tight tie. Everything but the sofa that was sitting on changed. Inside, people changed their faces and their clothes, as if they were changing their swords. Some of them I knew, some of them I didn't. However, I feel very familiar with the face of someone I've never seen in my life. It was a feeling that I could say it was complicated and strange, but even worse, unexplainable.

The landscape, which was changing rapidly, became fixed at some point. Jun-min focused his mind, taking a short breath. If a person gets tired, does he or she experience this phenomenon? While taking a break, I couldn't remember the advice my doctor friend gave me.

“Maybe it's time to take a break. ”

I've been running nonstop for 20 years, so I think it's time to rest. Joon-min lay on the couch again. I don't want you to stand up and dizzy and hurt your head. I tried to force him to sleep by giving him a chunky head.

Fortunately, I was calm when I closed my eyes. At this rate, I think I can fall asleep quickly.

‘Looks like you could use a break. ’

It was a body that quickly became slim. When I feel better, I feel confused and my brain started to move again, which had done nothing. I was worried that the strange phenomenon that had just happened was repeating, but the quiet blue office was not even a little frozen. While sighing in relief, the brain regenerated the life it had walked for the last 50 years. Just like watching a movie, Joon watched his life being portrayed in his mind. from a young man who was careless and challenging, to a young man who struggled with failure, to love who came late, to separation who came too early, to a self-portrait of a middle-aged man who burned more than he did when he was young. Despite all the adversity, I managed to break through to this moment. In retrospect, there were quite a few choices that could only be explained as fortunate. The choices that I couldn't understand at all as I am now have been pretending to be in the past, and the results have always been beneficial. It was a choice that was not damaging.

Like a person who has come to the path once, life has wisely walked through a curved path.

“Like the person who lived once again.... ”

It was when he unconsciously squeezed out his mouth.

Although there was an acronym, this life with certain success suddenly became unfamiliar. The moments that had lived so far suddenly felt like a well-crafted script. After several revisions and retreats, she secretly cursed at the thought that she seemed to have followed such a perfect life script that couldn't be better.

“Maybe I should go to the hospital. ”

He has been told he has a mental illness that he feels unfamiliar with. I have experienced realities that could not have been separate from myself before. feeling of isolation and deprivation at that moment. I didn't just feel tired, I thought I might be sick.

Jun-min still called the chief of staff at the company. It's foolish to pass it on when an ideal is detected. I'm sorry for my friend who's resting, but I need to go see him.

“Chief, can I ask you to drive? ”

Joon-min called the extension and saw the phone on the couch. In the liquid crystal that had not yet been extinguished, the face of Haji smiled brightly.

* * *

“Did you always eat so well? ”

“Don't make me say it. It's gonna explode. ”

The floor knocks on the boat and sees the falling terraces and confrontations. I ate dinner after watching a video, but the amount of food the two of them ate was huge. Even the sea that liked to eat secretly was impressive enough to declare a quitter on the way.

“I'm going to sleep for a while. ”

“Maru, I'm sorry. I'm suddenly sleepy, too. ”

Zebra crouches on the couch, and the crowd lies with the goddess by the veranda window. The sea crawled back into its chambers.

The floor shakes its head and clears out the dishes. I thought I'd get more food from the crowd, but I never thought I'd have to eat it all. When they came back from organizing, they fell asleep without knowing the world. The floor brought two blankets from the room and covered them both.

“Zara, come on. All that's left is to sleep. ”

The floor put the next videotape into the VCR and played back. Previously, there was only a bad video of Joon-min and his proactive act. The practice scene came out briefly, but it didn't change much if the training had not been done properly yet.

Just like before, Iron's face appeared on the jittery screen.

-Have you changed your mind?

- I don't know.

- Is that so?

- The smoke will be better in a few weeks. And to be honest, I don't trust him. He's learning to be anonymous and to teach someone. Just do it. Deal with it because people are so nice. I told them not to cheat if it was me.

- Great job, great job. I look pretty capable, though.

At that time, Jung Joo's voice was heard outside the camera.

- Come on, have some kim-bob!

I love kimbap.

- There's no such thing as strong.

People started to gather in front of the screen.