My Youth Love Story Doesn't Need A White Album Chapter 316
Recalling such a conversation during this period also reminded me of the interaction between Senior Xiao Muzhen and me.
In this era when communication facilities are so developed, my seniors and I haven’t even left each other’s email addresses for a while. Apart from not noticing, the two of us almost enjoy looking forward to the encounter in karaoke. The time, with surprise, there is the time of expectation.
After getting in touch with each other, how much time do you really spend in frequent contact with each other through mobile phones like Yui sister and her friends did?Obviously, you can ask the other party whether they will go to karaoke the next day through email, and you can clearly arrange a specific meeting time through email. However, the two of us are just like fools, obsessed with face-to-face communication, obsessed with accidental surprises.
The same is true for emotional perception. Obviously, you can communicate through straightforward words, but the dumb, suggestive dialogue fills the lives of the two.
Then, I understood the performance of the "Morikawa Yuki-style emotional experience" referred to by the predecessor Xiao Mu Shu.
In that era full of more temptations than it is now, the possibility of two people’s hearts being close together is very slim. Everyone around, everything may break up this unsteady love that has been cultivated since the student days, but The two people still tried their best to get closer to each other, understand each other, and finally achieved this.
This is actually a miracle—Ms. Morikawa mentioned this past with a happy expression, and the experience that Senior Xiaomu Zhao expected was also such an experience.
So, no matter whether she was intentional or unintentional, whether I actively cooperated or passively accepted, the story of the two of us approaching each other is coming to an end.
However, perhaps the reason why a miracle becomes a miracle lies in its non-replicability. At the end of the end, I may have to draw an unsatisfactory full stop to this story.
The future we are looking forward to must be carefully maintained, but no matter when, it seems so weak.
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In art works, at this critical time point, there is generally weather that matches the atmosphere as the background.For example, the scene where the white snow falls, and the background music sounds natural to make people feel stomachache, such as the autumn wind, accompanied by the tearful hero and heroine, which makes people feel sad.
In this sense, the rare and even strange warm sun of today's winter is somewhat out of date.
The environment is not suitable, and the location and time are equally embarrassing. During the lunch break, the stairs outside the third grade classroom do not seem to be known to too many people, but it is easy to reveal the time and location of the information, which is also my consideration. Choice.
To make others believe this fact, it is necessary to make Senior Xiao Muzhen himself believe it.
Senpai met me with a surprised expression-this should be the first time I took the initiative to look for her in school.I think she can realize that this time is unusual, but she will not know what I want to say.
In fact, even I don't know how to speak.
Fortunately or unfortunately, Senior Xiao Muzhen has too many ways to cope with such an uneasy me.
"The third grade is a weird time period!" Inconsistent with the usual academy idol's identity, he sat casually on the steps of the stairs. Senior Xiao Muzhen knocked on his lunch box while actively provoking the topic. .
Talking can relax me and prepare me to say what I want to say more fully. She knows this.
"Heya, do you know? When it was in the third grade, it was obvious that the center should be placed on the university entrance examination because it was an examinee. However, in many cases, this is not the case." He closed his ears and continued, "On the contrary, because in the third grade, many people will find that they have not enjoyed high school life well at all, so they want to do more things in the third grade— —It’s the same as accomplishing a task, wanting to make up for the lost high school life and lost youth completely — that’s the so-called leaving no regrets?”
I remembered the words of Director Iizuka before organizing the activities of the Light Music Club. He seemed to mean the same.
"However, I always feel that it is really good to be so anxious to deny my previous two years of life, and then make a kind of'huge change' in the third grade? Even if we don't consider the cost of these last activities In the normal study time, I just hold myself to do something that I didn’t do, and panic to complete certain tasks, and finally advertised that "I am also a youthful person." Does this really make sense?"
This is a reasonable thing, but if you tell this to those who want to enjoy your youth, it is meaningless. Senior Xiao Muzhu just said a piece of meaningless nonsense.
"Actually, what I mean is that I have been thinking about some things, whether I have been deliberate, or am I overly pursuing the completion of high school life."
I suddenly understood what seniors meant.
But why?Obviously it shouldn't be like this, right?Obviously, the object of this should be the opposite, right?
"If harmony is not a complete fool, I think you should understand the meaning of what I said at the previous cultural festival, right?"
"Well, this is what I want to say to seniors today."
However, I did not expect the situation to develop in this direction.
"Really? Then it seems that I and Heya's ideas coincide!" Senior Xiao Muzhen raised his eyebrows.
"So, about this matter, let me talk about it first—"
"--No way! Whoever mentions this first has the right to speak first!" However, Senior Xiao Muzhen quickly interrupted me.
"The senior should be modest to the younger--"
"——In this matter, is there a distinction between seniors and juniors? If you want to make a distinction, I think it is more reasonable for juniors to respect the wishes of seniors, right?"
Damn it, until this time, Senior Xiao Muzhen had been eaten to death.
"Of course, what I want to say is that I have done that kind of thing in a short period of time to overturn what I said, and I will definitely not believe it? In fact, I am also troubled-of course I am I like and also, but I don’t know exactly what kind of liking is, and to what extent I like it!"
Understanding the thoughts of girls has never been my specialty, but in this case, I still know the meaning behind these words of Senior Xiao Muzhen.
Senior is warning me, now, the right and wrong around her are a bit cumbersome.
No matter when, this kind of protection that has almost formed a habit is inevitable.
"So, I mean, if you still don’t know how to react, I’m willing to give you more time. Even, I think you don’t have to take my words to heart and don’t because of that. There are psychological pressures. After all, I do this kind of thing without authorization, which makes you feel quite troubled."
For a long time, the way I get along with Xiao Muzhu-senior is that she put forward her ideas, and then I reacted passively. I was overwhelmed by the various unexpected performances of seniors-until now.
I did not expect that the predecessors would first raise the important issue of shelving so decisively.
However, this time was different. For the first time, I had the opportunity to give Senior Xiao Muzhu a surprise-although this opportunity was a bit bitter.
"On this point, I don't think it is necessary."
"Huh?" Senior Xiao Muzhen showed an unexpected expression.
"After that, I thought about it for a long time, and I also liked Senior Xiao Muzhen very much, but, as the seniors said, the feelings for seniors are more respect for seniors, or love between men and women, I think , It may be the former."
When I said it, I just said what I found to be difficult.Although this may not be the original intention of the words of the predecessor Xiao Muzhen, but in the direction that induces me to say what I am going to say, the predecessor Xiao Muzhen still has achieved remarkable results.
However, refusal that is not in line with my own mind makes people feel so uncomfortable. The feeling of blood tumbling and trembling body makes me stand like a zombie—I believe if If I move a little bit, I may become awkward, and it will make the seniors detect accidents.
However, even now I am even more embarrassed.However, Senior Xiao Muzhu couldn't seem to notice my embarrassment.
I stood up the first time I finished speaking, then sat down quickly, and quickly lowered her head, hiding her expression in the shadows. She hadn't spoken for a long time.The bento box trembled constantly with her knees, and was caught by her senior when she was about to fall to the ground.
"Well, is this Heye's final answer?"
"It's not because I'm too urgent? I mean, it's okay to think again." Senior Xiao Muzhen's slightly panic and anxious voice made me feel like a knife.
However, I can only continue.
"I think the time that seniors gave me is enough. I need to think for so long. I'm sorry."
"But, what I said before—"
"——As I said before, to help Senior get rid of the status quo, I will continue to do it. I don't want to see Senior's disguised smile. This is also true."
"So, Kazuya, what kind of expression do you want to see me now? Is it a true expression or a fake smile?"
Only this question, I think, I cannot answer.