Chapter 118: THE CALM BEFORE
KEISHA’S POV
Taking time away from work should have felt like a relief.
Instead, it only gave me more hours to think.
The house had never seemed so quiet before. Every step reminded me that I wasn’t where I was supposed to be. Around this time on any normal day, I’d be buried under reports, answering messages from different departments or helping Nadia untangle whatever problem had somehow found its way to her desk. Now all I had was silence.
The rumours spreading through the estate certainly weren’t helping.
I hadn’t stepped outside much since returning from the clinic, but even from inside the house, I could tell people were talking. Guards lingered a little longer whenever they passed my gate. No one had come to question me directly, yet I could almost feel the curiosity drifting through the pack.
My hand drifted unconsciously to my stomach.
Everything had changed so quickly.
Only a week ago, the pregnancy had been my secret. Now it belonged to everyone.
I let out a slow breath and leaned farther back against the headboard, trying to distract myself with the book resting open on my lap. I had been staring at the same page for nearly ten minutes without reading a single sentence when Lyra’s voice floated down the hallway.
"Keisha?"
"I’m in here."
She appeared a moment later, already dressed for the day, her hair tied loosely behind her shoulders and a light sweater hanging over one arm. "You’ve been hiding in this room since breakfast."
"I wouldn’t call it hiding."
She smiled knowingly. "I would."
Closing the book, I set it aside and watched her walk farther into the room.
"I was thinking..." she began. "Why don’t we go outside for a while? Just the two of us."
I frowned. "Outside?"
"We’ve both been inside this house for too long." She shrugged. "A little fresh air won’t hurt either of us."
"I’m fine."
"I know." She smiled again, softer this time. "But you’ve been saying that a lot lately and we need to talk."
I couldn’t even argue with her.
She wasn’t accusing me of anything. If anything, she sounded exactly like she used to whenever I’d tried convincing her I wasn’t sick enough to stay home from school. I rarely won those arguments then, and I wasn’t likely to win this one either.
"Just a walk," she added. "If you get tired, we’ll come straight back."
After another moment of hesitation, I nodded. "Alright."
The weather outside was cooler than I’d expected.
Clouds floated lazily across the sky, shielding the sun often enough that the afternoon never became too warm. We walked without any real destination in mind, greeting the occasional pack member who passed us along the paths. Some offered polite smiles while others glanced at me for a second too long before looking away.
Whether they knew or were simply curious, I couldn’t tell and neither option made me feel any better.
Lyra noticed it too. "They’ll get bored eventually," she said quietly as we continued walking.
"I hope so."
"They will." She slipped her hands into the pockets of her cardigan. "People always move on to the next story."
"I’d rather not be this one’s."
"You didn’t exactly choose it."
I looked at her and she wasn’t smiling anymore.
For a while, neither of us spoke again.
We wandered farther from the busier paths until we reached one of the smaller gardens tucked behind the old training grounds. Hardly anyone came there during the day. A few benches overlooked a small pond, its surface barely disturbed except for the occasional ripple from the breeze.
"This looks perfect." Lyra sat first, patting the empty space beside her.
I joined her, grateful for the quiet.
For several minutes, we simply watched the water.
It reminded me of home. Not this estate. Our real home. The one we’d left years ago.
"You’re probably expecting me to blow off. I’ve been thinking a lot lately since he left," Lyra said at last.
"About?"
"You."
I turned toward her. She wasn’t looking at me. Her eyes remained fixed on the pond, as though the memories she wanted were floating somewhere across its surface.
"You know..." she said with a small laugh, "sometimes I still forget you’re an adult."
I raised an eyebrow. "I don’t think anyone else does."
"I do." She smiled to herself. "When I look at you, I still see the little girl who used to follow me everywhere."
"I did not."
Lyra’s smile slowly faded into something gentler. "You really were tiny."
"I wasn’t that small."
"You were." She looked at me then, her eyes softening. "There were days I worried I’d break you just by holding you."
The humour disappeared from my face as she reached over and brushed a loose strand of hair away from my forehead. "You were so young when everything changed," she murmured. "You shouldn’t have had to grow up as fast as you did."
Neither should you, I wanted to say.
But the words stayed in my throat. She’d given up more than I ever had. While other girls our age had worried about school dances and holidays, Lyra had worried about rent, groceries, uniforms and making sure I never realised just how difficult things had become.
"I wasn’t always the best at it," she continued quietly. "There were days I had no idea what I was doing. I just kept telling myself that as long as you smiled at least once before bed, I’d done something right."
"You did everything right."
Her eyes glistened for only a moment before she blinked the emotion away. "I tried."
"You didn’t try." I smiled. "You succeeded."
She reached over and squeezed my hand. "I only wanted you to have a better life than I did."
"You gave me one."
She looked at me for a long moment before taking a slow breath. "Can I ask you something?"
The smile on my face faltered slightly but I didn’t let it show too much. "You can ask."
"It’s about Dane."