Pokémon: Raising Abandoned Pokémon into Legends

After downing all the beer, Munchlax let out a long, satisfied burp. Its face flushed slightly as it looked at the three Pokémon and Rio. Hmph—serves you right for not inviting me.

On the other side, although Mewtwo was a little annoyed that Munchlax had finished all the beer, it didn’t take its anger out on the little one—that was just how this species behaved. You couldn’t really get mad at a child for that. So it simply turned to Rio: "Go—get more beer."

"More beer!" Gengar echoed. "And more snacks too—what you bought was barely enough for anyone! B2ack in the day, Gus and I would’ve thought you were some kind of street beggar."

"Roaar~" Charizard flapped its wings, even though it could barely stand, urging Rio to climb on.

"You’re all a bunch of ancestors! I told you to savor it, to take your time—but no, you just had to wolf it all down. Now you want me to play errand boy again? Get more beer and snacks? Dream on!" Rio crossed his arms, putting on a show of defiance.

The four Pokémon exchanged glances. Then Rio added: "Only a father has the duty to buy beer for his adopted sons. So—call me ’Daddy’ and I’ll go get more. That’s the rule of drinking."

Gengar frowned. Had the rules changed in the last hundred years? When it bought beer with Gus, it was never like this.

"Daddy," Mewtwo said without hesitation.

It figured that since Rio had said it was a drinking rule, it should follow it—just like how he’d said beer gets better the more you drink, and that had turned out to be true. It was already getting hooked.

Rio’s eyes went wide. He hadn’t expected Mewtwo to actually say it. When he’d first blurted out that line, a wave of regret had hit him, snapping him halfway out of his buzz. That was a rule from his dorm days—not something you say to a group of Pokémon, especially not to Mewtwo. He’d been half-expecting to get shredded.

"Alright, alright—good son. Daddy will go buy you some beer," Rio said, deciding to roll with it since Mewtwo had actually played along.

"Let’s go, Charizard—we’re getting beer and snacks." He climbed onto Charizard’s back.

"Roaar~" Charizard excitedly spread its wings and took off—but after flying a few dozen meters, it started weaving, heading straight for a nearby tree.

"Hey, hey—tree! Tree! Watch out!" Rio’s remaining buzz vanished instantly as he yelled in panic. But at the last moment, a psychic force saved them, floating them safely midair.

Rio let out a sigh of relief. That was close—would’ve been a disaster. He looked down at Charizard, who was barely responsive even while being levitated.

Already drunk? That didn’t take much—this guy’s got low tolerance, Rio thought. About one or two beers, and it’s out cold.

"Is this what you humans call being drunk?" Mewtwo’s voice echoed in his mind as it appeared before him.

"Pretty much," Rio shrugged, recalling Charizard. "It’s not going to be doing any flying tonight."

"I’ll go with you," Gengar volunteered. "I want some hard liquor—Gus and I used to love it a hundred years ago."

This one’s definitely a heavy drinker, Rio thought, watching Gengar call out for baijiu.

"Count me in too," Mewtwo added. It had just realized—if Rio left, its mind might start spiraling again.

"Fine—let’s all go." Rio agreed, and they set off together—Rio, Mewtwo, Gengar, and Munchlax—to buy more drinks.

But on the way, Rio froze. Something felt wrong. Weren’t we supposed to be helping Mewtwo find the meaning of life? How did this turn into a drinking party?

The next morning.

Rio woke up under a tree, parched, and chugged a bottle of water from his bag.

"Never drinking again. This stuff is great when you’re drinking it, but the morning after is pure regret."

Looking at Mewtwo, Gengar, and Munchlax lying around, and the craters scattered across the area, Rio muttered: "I think I might be turning Mewtwo into a drunk."

Fragments of the night came back to him. Late into the night, Mewtwo had gotten completely wasted, hurling Aura Sphere after Aura Sphere into the ground, leaving craters everywhere, screaming incomprehensible roars. Gengar had translated: "To hell with the meaning of life! Why do I even need to find it?!" Over and over.

Just then, Mewtwo stirred, its eyes slowly opening. It looked just as rough as Rio felt. Spotting the water bottle in Rio’s hand, it used Psychic to snatch it away and downed the whole thing.

Once it felt better, it stared at the craters with a look of disgust. "Who did this? How irresponsible—destroying the environment like that. What about the wild Pokémon living here?" it asked telepathically.

Rio stared at Mewtwo in disbelief. Well, well—that was some serious blackout drunk. Doesn’t even remember what it did.

Seeing Rio’s shocked expression, Mewtwo felt a twinge of unease. It reached out with its senses and detected Aura Sphere residue in each crater—residue that matched its own power.

It fell silent for a long moment. Its mind started churning again about the meaning of life.

Rio had said that life had no inherent meaning—that it was a blank page, and you write your own meaning. Last night, it hadn’t really processed those words. Now, it gave them serious thought.

Finally, Mewtwo’s voice echoed in Rio’s mind: "You said life has no meaning, and that we write our own. Does that mean that last night—drinking beer—had no meaning on its own, but I felt joy, so it gained the meaning of joy?"