Possessing Nothing

Inside the open door is a little boy. In fact, Lee Sung-min couldn't tell if he was a boy or a girl. He seemed to be a man in some ways and a woman in other ways.

Lee Seong-min looked at him or her for a moment and asked, stuttering.

“... Denir? ”

“That's right."

Denir nods. Just as I couldn't tell his gender by his looks, neither could I tell his voice. Just like the Mesh did, Denner looked like a little boy. It was not clear to Lee Sung-min why the existence of "God" was taking such immature forms, but it was not such a question that matters now.

“Damn mesh. Why did you leave me with such a nuisance? ”

Denir grunts and turns away. Lee Seong-min looks at Denir's back as she sighs loudly and looks back at him.

“Are you satisfied just by looking at my face? ”

“… Yes? ”

“If that's enough, it's good for me. ”

That can't be right. Lee Sung-min hurriedly followed after Denir. The door was closed as if Lee Sung-min had waited for him to enter the door. Denir walks down the hall as loud as he can. The corridor of the small countryside was not very long, and it did not take long to reach the living room. Lee Sung-min looked at Denir's back. Short-haired hair that was bouncing over his shoulders looked like that of a boy and looked like that of a girl. While feeling a peculiar glamour at it, Denner turns around. Denir makes his way to the nearby couch and sits down.

“What do you want from me? ”

Denir asks. It was a sudden question, and Lee Sung-min, who didn't have an answer, hesitates for a moment. Denir once again said to Lee Sung-min,

“I hope you didn't come in a greeting car. What do you want from me? ”

“All of a sudden, I don't know what to say...”

“Hm. That, too. Then I'll change the question. What do you want? ”

The name changes, what Lee wants from Denny, what Lee wants from himself. However, Lee could not answer the question properly. Denir chuckles in silence.

“You're indecisive. Or maybe you're thinking too much. Well, good. God has to be merciful. Let's talk more comfortably than this. ”

Denir twists his legs, saying so. Even if we wanted to talk, we've only met for the first time, and I don't know what we can say to God. Lee Sung-min, who was keeping his lips shut for a while, opened his mouth.

“Are you a man or a woman? ”

It wasn't a serious question. It was just a joke to break this awkward atmosphere. Denire laughs in vain at the question.

“You care about the odds. No. Humans are like that... Gender doesn't exist in God. I just have a little taste. The only thing the mesh is taking a woman's form is her nasty taste. A god who looks like a young girl who conducts trials and persecutions. Don't you think that's awful? ”

I never thought of it that way, but I also felt it when I heard Denir say it. Denir continues to speak to Lee Sung-min, who nods his head dazed.

“So am I. Gender doesn't exist when I'm drunk. If you want to be a man, think of it as a man, think of it as a woman, if you want to be a woman. ”

“… is it just your taste to look young? ”

“No. It's not taste. It's inevitable. ”

Denir mumbles as he pulls out his cigar. The neutral child biting a cigar much thicker than my finger was filled with glamour.

“You're going back in time. ”

Denir mutters. Hearing that, Lee Sung-min's cheeks twitch. But I wasn't surprised. It was natural for the new man, Denir, to realize that the causal rate was distorted. Denner couldn't have known what the mesh had noticed.

“The causality is distorted. Well, there's not a lot of twisted causality out there. Your case is unique. I've traveled back in time. I've returned from the consequences of death... Hehe! It's very funny.”

Denir shakes his legs and smiles. Lee Sung-min looked at Denir like that, then opened his mouth and asked.

“I am blessed with being unknown. I erased some of it, but not all of it. ”

“I know. The blessings of one who cares about you are untouchable." You've removed some of the blessings? Hehe. It wasn't erased. It was allowed to be erased. It's not that important. ”

Denir smiles and replies. Lee said over and over again.

“Can you tell me more about this? ”

“Your existence is alien. ”

That's what Denner said.

“You've come back from the dead and have a memory before you die. Without you, the world will go on as you remember it. Of course you should. However, the existence of 'you’ itself becomes a variable. ”

“What... do you mean? ”

“Did you live the same life as before? ”

Denir asks.

“Can you say you've lived without any difference? Can you say that you've lived every single day of your past life? Sleep, eat, drink, cheap, talk, meet at the same time every day of your life. Did you?”

“Th-that can't be right. How do you do that? ”

“Yes, that's why your existence has become a variable. Because you've spent a different day from your previous life, your existence is a variable to the flow of the world. ”

“I'm not that great. ”

“A little butterfly's wings can be a big whirlpool from afar. In fact, the world is different than you know it is. Isn't it?”

In saying that, Lee Sung-min's face was stiff. Something came up.

Lloyd, the golden steed, was lost in the life Lee Sung-min remembers. However, because ‘Lee Sung-min’ was in the dungeon, Lloyd was reborn without being lost.

There is a different rumour about Wijihoen in SocheonMa. She dropped her credentials faster than in her previous life and was becoming known as a woman, not a man.

Several hundred things come to Lee's mind, apart from the two that are the biggest differences. Did you spend every single day like you did in your previous life? That can't be right. I don't even remember every single day of my life.

Did I fall asleep at the same time? Eat, drink, chew, talk, meet.

Impossible. Even if I could remember every single day of my past life clearly, I wouldn't be able to live like that. Lee Sung-min is different from his previous life. I learned another shaman, I lived another life, I brought another encounter.

“The existence of you is becoming a variable, transforming the world into a previous life. What do you think that means? ”

“… I don't know…”

“Your very existence shatters the entire flow of this world? It's growing. ”

Denir grins with his teeth bared.

“I am the God of Time. Time is flow. Your existence is turning this world into a new world by not allowing it to flow in the direction it should. Do you want to know who protects you? How can I answer him? No one in the world will be able to tell about him. In particular, we can never talk about God. ”

“Why...? ”

“It's an ‘end’ that must be remembered. As soon as we mention it, we have to be prepared for extinction. If you are a believing god with your holy place like the Mesh, you can destroy the Apostle of the Apostle of the Apocalypse, but I am impossible. I don't have a holy book, and I don't have a congregation. ”

Apostle of Armageddon. The moment I heard the name, Lee Sung-min felt cold. It was a sensation I had felt before. When I heard Mesh's own words. And when I heard the story from Jonghyun Kim. I've felt this chill before.

“Haha... Look. The apostle's spirit is approaching even though it's a light mention. I don't want to talk anymore, so please stay back. ”

Denir says with a joyful look. The cold grows away from the words. Lee Seong-min touched his neck, bursting his blocked breath.

“Bar, what the hell was that? ”

“The apostle was just about to come. I can't tell you anymore. Still... I see you're a communicative opponent. ”

Denir raises his head as he says so.

“I can't answer your question. Not all the gods can answer your question. We, too, are powerless in the face of the Apocalypse, who have not lifted the veil of mortality. ”

“Then who can answer? ”

“Find the one without the veil of mortality. ”

“You have to tell me who it is...! ”

“Envirus.”

With Lee Sung-min's low shout, Denir replies with a grumpy face.

“He's just wandering around. I don't know where he is now. He might be able to answer your question. He's a twisted causal factor, which means he's different from you. ”

Envirus, Envirus... Lee Sung-min remembered that name in his head. The memory of my past life reminded me that I did not know anyone named Envirus.

“So, let's start listening to the story. What are you asking me to do? Why did the Mesh send you here? ”

“… I… am not sure. Mesh said," If you go back in time to the dead, there's a good reason. "And they told me to be prepared to be the right person for it. ”

“Yes. I see. That's why the damn Mesh sent you to me. ”

Denire looks at reason as he says so. Denir shakes his head, looking at Lee Sung-min for a moment.

“But I can't. ”

“… Yes? ”

“I said no. I can't give you my trials. ”

“Wait... a trial. What does that even mean? You mean you can give me a hard time? ”

“I can give it to you. But you won't be able to handle it. I'm going to... die. This is a piece of advice I'm giving you. ”

“I endured the ordeal on the mountain of the Mesh. I'm used to pain...”

“This is not the pain you know. The Mesh's persecution, trials and taboos are very sweet. Even though Mesh himself is a god of trial and persecution. After all, money is what you choose, and you can give up in the middle. ”

Denire says that and chuckles.

“But my trials are different. My trials do not guarantee that I will ‘necessarily’ gain anything other than those of the Mesh. Because it's always up to you. And horrible and painful and boring. Ten people have met me and suffered from me so far. And only three of them made it through the trials. ”

“… the rest? ”

“They're all dead. Ah, the trials didn't kill them. They just gave up on themselves and killed themselves. None of the ten who challenged me were worse than you. Everyone had a shining talent, passion, hard work, tenacity and venom. But only three of them survived the trials. ”

Denir raises his head as he says so.

“First, let your head cool a little. If you come and ask for a trial anytime... yes. If you want to kill yourself. Then it's not like you won't be able to give me a trial. ”

“Chill your head...”

“Come back to sleep. ”

Denir grimaces and grunts.

“Ah. But you can't sleep here. This is my house. ”

I said get out of the house.