Chapter 857 - 843: Acceptance
Just by holding her, his heart could no longer remain calm.
The pounding in his chest felt like sunlight falling on his body, driving away all the darkness inside.
He felt brightness and color.
Xuan Yan looked at her pale face, worried out of his mind. "Your complexion is very pale. How about I take you to an inter-clan doctor for a look?"
Su Muyao shook her head. "I’m fine. I know medicine myself. I’ll be okay after a bit of rest, really."
Afraid Xuan Yan wouldn’t believe her, Su Muyao’s gaze was utterly sincere.
Xuan Yan was still holding Su Muyao by the waist, not loosening his grip, and his hands were still sending energy into her.
As Su Muyao gradually felt some strength returning, she also felt Xuan Yan transmitting energy to her.
She hurriedly struggled out of Xuan Yan’s arms. "I’m really fine now, don’t waste energy on me."
Watching Su Muyao pull away from his embrace, Xuan Yan felt a sort of indescribable loss in his chest.
A very unfamiliar feeling.
"It’s not a waste. My Beast Power backlash used to be very severe. You just helped relieve it a lot."
"My body feels much lighter too."
This feeling was very comfortable.
So he was grateful to Su Muyao in his heart.
Yet he didn’t know what he could do for her.
Su Muyao said, "It’s good that you feel better. With my current spiritual power, I can only dispel a portion of it each time. It might take many days to fully repair your Spirit Sea."
The Spirit Sea was connected to his Beast Power backlash; once the Spirit Sea problem was handled, the backlash in his Beast Power would also disappear.
But his situation seemed very特殊; if he used his superpower, it would even trigger the Beast Power backlash.
"Try to use your superpower as little as possible. It will make your Beast Power backlash worse."
"But I won’t let anything happen to you."
Even if she could only use a bit of spiritual power at a time, after doing it several times, she would help him resolve these issues.
Xuan Yan looked at her pale face, her expression still bright, and asked softly, "Won’t this be very exhausting for you?"
"It’s nothing."
She was willing to help him.
"Is there anything you need me to do?"
Su Muyao didn’t quite understand what Xuan Yan meant, but answered honestly, "I don’t need you to do anything. You just need to stay well, don’t run into danger."
"Why?"
Su Muyao was a bit confused. "Why what?"
"Why are you good to me, helping me, yet have no conditions at all?"
Su Muyao blinked and answered without hesitation, "You’re my Beast Husband; of course I’ll soothe your Spirit Sea for you."
"That’s something I ought to do."
Listening to this, Xuan Yan’s heart stirred, deeply moved.
In his understanding, females always had high demands for males.
Even when a female soothed her Beast Husband’s spirit, there were always conditions; if the Beast Husband’s performance didn’t satisfy her, the female not only refused to soothe him, she wouldn’t even see him.
Not to mention giving birth to a Zaizai.
Su Muyao seemed to think of something and answered his previous question. "Earlier you asked about Zaizai. Yes, we do have one. His name is Ruirui, he’s just not in this world."
"He’s very sensible and very beautiful, and quite like you."
Xuan Yan’s heart trembled and surged with excitement.
Dreaming of it was one thing; hearing Su Muyao say it was real, his heart was boiling.
"Miss Su, thank you..."
"And I’m sorry I forgot those memories."
It was his fault; right now he didn’t know what to do, how to make up for it.
How could she be so good, placing no conditions on her own Beast Husband.
Completely different from other females.
Even his own Female Mother could be very indifferent to some of her Beast Husbands.
His father, the City Lord of Black Rock City, was just one of his mother’s Beast Husbands. At first, when they were together, they were very loving, but later, once his Female Mother had other Beast Husbands, she left Black Rock City and never saw his father again.
She was really different.
Su Muyao said gently, "Don’t overthink it. Forgetting is just forgetting; it’s not your fault, it’s mine for failing to protect you."
"Back then I didn’t have strong power and couldn’t do anything."
"And this matter is a bit complicated. To begin with, my Beast Husband was Shen Ci’an. He looked exactly like you. You and he share one body, same origin, same root..."
Su Muyao sat down and began telling Xuan Yan his origin, explaining the relationship among him, Shen Ci’an, and Shen Jinsuo.
As Su Muyao talked, she watched Xuan Yan’s expression closely.
Afraid he wouldn’t be able to accept it.
But Xuan Yan’s expression remained calm, only occasionally did a deep, obscure gleam flicker in his Blood-colored Eyes, and it was impossible to tell what he was thinking.
Anyway, Su Muyao couldn’t read his emotions.
Perhaps his emotions were simply very contained.
After listening, Xuan Yan fell silent.
Su Muyao worried that he would be hurt or unwilling to accept this, and considerately said, "You were originally Xuan Che, and you are free. If you didn’t fuse with Shen Ci’an, maybe you and I would have nothing to do with each other."
"If these past things make you uncomfortable, you’re still free."
"As for that Contract mark, I’ll find a way to remove it for you."
That way, Xuan Yan would still be a free male here, able to find a beloved female to become his wife.
She didn’t want to force anyone into anything.
As for Ruirui, Shen Ci’an was his father.
"I just want to trouble you with one thing..."
Before Su Muyao could finish, a fresh stab of pain seized Xuan Yan’s chest.
This time it was a wrenching, heart-twisting pain.
"No, I’m only grateful—grateful that I’m one with him."
"I am your Beast Husband, and that won’t change."
They already had a Contract bond, and that would never change.
He loathed any other female; only when he looked at her did it feel different.
He didn’t understand love, but he did understand that he wanted to look at her, wanted to be close to her.
Before, he never understood why his Female Mother could be so indifferent to her Beast Husbands while they loved her so much, willing to give anything for her.
Even to lose their lives to protect her.
Now he understood.
Understood that feeling.
He wasn’t wrong; he was grateful for Shen Ci’an’s existence. If he’d never fused with Shen Ci’an, perhaps he would never have had the chance to have such a good wife.
"I won’t fight for anything. Just let me stay by your side, all right?"
"Don’t remove the mark."
"And don’t say you’re troubling me. Whatever you want me to do, I’ll do."
Su Muyao looked up at Xuan Yan, and was pricked by the pain in his eyes.
She felt that what she’d just said might have hurt him.
Even with no memory, he was still treating her so well.
Unlike Xie Guixue.
He’d become very cold to her later, and even in the dream he was cold.
Su Muyao shook her head, forcing herself not to think about that.
"Okay. If you want to, you’re still my Beast Husband. You can stay anywhere you like."
"If you want to live here, you can. If you want to live in the City Lord Mansion and come over when you have time, that’s fine too."
Su Muyao always gave her Beast Husbands enough freedom and respect.
She would never force them to do anything.
All the more so since Xuan Yan currently had no memory; there were many things he needed to adapt to bit by bit.
Right now Xuan Yan could feel this respect, and it made him very comfortable.
No female had ever been willing to consider a Beast Husband’s feelings so much. Of course, females who married in could be better, but still not like her.
At this moment, Xuan Yan’s heart held nothing but gratitude—gratitude that he’d become her Beast Husband.
Yet he hated that he’d lost his memories.
His Female Mother had said that here he would find the path home and back, and he would also regain his memories.
So he would slowly find them again.
"Miss Su, you just said you wanted me to do something. Please tell me."
Anything he could do, he would.
Su Muyao said, "I want to ask the High Priest some questions. I heard your Female Mother is the High Priest. When spring comes, can you take us to see her?"
"I just want to ask some things, and to find out how to leave here and return to the original world—that is, the world where Ruirui is."
Putting it that way, Xuan Yan should understand what she meant.
In fact, there were many questions she wanted to ask.