Chapter 331| I Am Far More Terrified Of Dying With The Regret Of Never Having The Courage To Walk By Your Side
The eastern horizon of Iron Hearth was still painted in a melancholic gray-blue. The sun had yet to fully rise, but the signature biting chill of the North was already piercing straight to the marrow.
In the quiet front courtyard of the Sudrath Castle, human breath instantly plumed into thin white vapor. Haaah...
Caelus stood near the gates. The young man wore a thick, dark-blue travel cloak, the silver sun emblem of the Aethelgard royal family pinned neatly to his chest. Beside him, Ramirez—his loyal, aging bodyguard—stood calmly holding the reins of two horses.
There was no grand escort of elite Sol-Regis knights to retrieve him. Just the two of them.
A few steps away from Caelus stood Raveena.
The woman’s hair was left unbound, fluttering messily in the dawn wind. Her blue eyes were swollen and red. The tips of her fingers gripped the fabric of her nightgown so tightly her knuckles turned white.
"Do you... do you really have to leave this soon, Caelus?" Raveena whispered hoarsely, her voice nearly shattered by the wind.
Caelus smiled. A soothing, tender smile that always managed to calm the raging storms inside Raveena’s head. The man raised a leather-gloved hand, gently caressing his lover’s freezing cheek.
"My father’s condition is deteriorating very rapidly, Raveena. As his son... I need to be there," Caelus answered softly.
Raveena lowered her face. Her shoulders trembled slightly. "I... I don’t know what to do. My heart is a mess."
Caelus stepped forward, closing the distance between them. He pulled Raveena’s slender frame into his embrace. Holding her incredibly tight.
"Listen," Caelus whispered into her ear. "I will never force you to come with me to Sol-Regis. I know exactly how much that school, your students, and this Northern home mean to you."
"But... if I stay here, I’m terrified of losing you, Caelus," Raveena sobbed, burying her face into his chest. "And if I go with you... I’m terrified of losing myself."
Caelus stroked her hair gently. "Whatever decision you make later, my love... I will accept it with an open heart."
They embraced in the freezing silence of the dawn. Absorbing each other’s warmth as provisions for their parting.
Unbeknownst to them, from behind a massive marble pillar not too far away... a pair of gray eyes was watching in silence.
Raphael leaned against the back of the pillar. The young man pulled his school coat tighter around himself.
Seeing his older sister—a mage who always presented herself as strong, fierce, and utterly tearless—now looking so fragile and desperate, caused something to ache painfully within Raphael’s chest.
So... this is what the fear of losing someone you love looks like? Raphael thought, a stinging sensation in his gut.
He swallowed hard. Gulp. Flashes of yesterday afternoon replayed in his mind, remembering how he had run away like a coward, leaving Elodie at the intersection. He didn’t want to be a coward forever. He refused to end up tasting the bitter regret currently haunting his sister.
In the courtyard, Caelus slowly released his embrace. He looked into Raveena’s eyes for the last time that morning.
"The Lightning Rail heading to the capital departs this afternoon. Ramirez and I need to prepare," Caelus said. He carved one final, parting smile, then turned and mounted his horse.
Clip, clop, clip, clop. The sound of horse hooves slowly faded, parting the morning mist.
Leaving Raveena standing paralyzed alone in the freezing courtyard, hugging herself with dried tears on her cheeks.
A few hours later, at the Seruni Academy.
The morning bell had just chimed loudly across the school grounds. Clang! Clang!
Raphael stepped into the Advanced Studies classroom, his heart pumping at a manic pace. He felt like he would much rather be ordered by Sergeant Garon to run laps around the field carrying boulders than face this super-awkward situation.
He walked stiffly down the aisle between the desks. And there she was.
Elodie was already sitting sweetly in her chair. The girl was taking out her notebooks and quill pen.
Right as Raphael pulled out the chair next to hers... their eyes collided.
Thump.
Time seemed to stop ticking for three full seconds. Raphael held his breath, waiting for the girl to look away or bow her head in embarrassment like yesterday.
However... a small miracle happened.
Elodie didn’t look away at all. The brunette didn’t panic. Instead, she tilted her head slightly, staring straight at Raphael with a deep, scrutinizing gaze. And then... the corners of her lips slowly curled upward.
Elodie carved a faint smile. An incredibly warm smile.
Raphael felt a jolt of static electricity shoot from his toes straight to the top of his head. Remembering his absolute resolve behind the pillar that dawn, the youngest prince forced his neck muscles not to turn away. He returned Elodie’s gaze, and slowly... he returned her smile.
The awkwardness still hung in the air, but it no longer felt suffocating.
Throughout the class session, the two of them didn’t exchange many words. Lady Elara was busy at the front, writing rows of logarithmic formulas with her chalk tapping loudly against the board. Tap-tap-tap.
However, there was a palpable shift in the atmosphere at their desk.
When Raphael shifted to write, his right elbow accidentally brushed against Elodie’s left elbow. Instead of reflexively yanking their arms away like electrocuted victims as they had the days prior... this time, they allowed their elbows to lightly touch.
Sharing warmth without needing to bother stringing together words.
The recess bell rang, rescuing the smoking brains of the students.
In the school garden, the midday breeze blew coolly, sweeping through the branches. Pristine white Seruni petals drifted down slowly, dancing in the air before landing on the green grass lightly dusted with snow.
Raphael and Elodie sat side by side on a wooden park bench beneath the shady tree. The physical distance between their bodies had shrunk significantly compared to yesterday.
"Hey, Raphael..."
Elodie was the first to break the silence. The girl’s voice flowed softly, parting the wind. "Lady Raveena... she explained it to me yesterday."
Raphael turned his head slowly. "Explained what?"
"She explained the meaning of the foreign vocabulary word you said to me yesterday," Elodie looked down at her lap, her fingers intertwining as she played with the hem of her skirt. "The meaning of the word... ’girlfriend’."
Gulp. Raphael’s Adam’s apple bobbed. His brain instantly sounded a Code Red alarm.
"O-Oh... I-I see," Raphael mumbled, stammering as he suddenly lost all his vocabulary. He rubbed the back of his neck roughly. "Listen, El... I am so incredibly sorry about that. I should have... I should have been man enough to explain it to you directly."
Elodie didn’t acknowledge the apology. Instead, she shifted her sitting position, turning fully to face Raphael.
"Lady Raveena said... that word is used for someone you like beyond the boundaries of an ordinary friend," Elodie stated, her brilliant eyes looking dead into Raphael’s gray ones. "Someone whose silhouette sneaks into your mind, uninvited, day and night."
Raphael sat frozen solid.
"So..." Elodie swallowed hard, her voice trembling slightly from nerves. "...Raphael Sudrath, do you truly like me? Or... was what you said at the intersection yesterday just a spontaneous joke from a bored prince?"
The wind blew again, dropping a single Seruni petal right onto Raphael’s lap.
The young man stared at the flower petal. The memory of Raveena’s tears at dawn flashed back into his mind. The tragic fear of losing the person you love.
No. I will not be a coward anymore, he resolved firmly in his heart.
Raphael looked up. There was no longer any trace of hesitation, panic, or arrogance on his face. His eyes stared straight ahead, locking onto the village girl before him with an intensity he had never shown before.
"I like you, Elodie," Raphael stated. His voice wasn’t loud, but his articulation was incredibly firm and absolute. "I have never been this serious in my entire life."
Silence. The beating of both their hearts seemed to hammer against their ribs, racing to be the loudest.
And then... a smile slowly blossomed across Elodie’s face.
Not an awkward smile. Not a polite, forced smile. But a genuinely sweet, profoundly relieved smile that radiated absolute acceptance.
"Thank goodness," Elodie whispered softly, a rosy blush reclaiming her cheeks. "Because... I really like you too, Raphael."
Hearing that confirmation—which felt like a golden meteor falling from the heavens—Raphael’s ’cool guy’ defenses were utterly pulverized without a trace. The youngest prince couldn’t hold it back any longer. The corners of his lips pulled to their maximum limit, flashing his teeth—a goofy, genuine, and incredibly wide grin that was impossible to hide.
The two of them didn’t continue the conversation.
Both leaned back against the wooden bench, enjoying the breeze that scattered the falling Seruni flowers. Sharing a single space of magical silence that was infinitely more beautiful and meaningful than a million lines of poetry.
Late afternoon finally arrived. The sunlight slowly dipped, painting the sky of Iron Hearth in melancholic gradients of orange and purple.
At the city’s Lightning Rail Station, the atmosphere was quite busy. Hot steam hissed from the metal funnel pipes on the station ceiling. Ssshhh... The magnetic drone of the maglev train built by Rianor thrummed low, vibrating the stone platform. Vwuuunggg...
Caelus stood tall on the main departure platform, one hand gripping a thick leather suitcase. Behind him, Ramirez was standing by with the boarding tickets.
"Attention to all passengers! The Lightning Rail express bound for the Capital of Sol-Regis will depart in exactly three minutes!"
The conductor’s raspy voice echoed from the mechanical loudspeakers.
Caelus drew a long breath. He turned his head slowly toward the back of the platform. Staring wistfully at the woman who owned his heart.
Raveena stood paralyzed a dozen meters away from Caelus. She carried no bag. No luggage. She merely stood there in her thin coat, hugging her own arms. Her face still radiated an overwhelmingly fierce hesitation. Her feet seemed nailed to the platform asphalt.
Damn it, what am I supposed to do? Raveena’s mind screamed in panic. Her head felt like it was going to split open.
Suddenly, her memory was thrown back to the conversation she had last night with Raphael in his room. Her youngest brother—who was so rigid, prideful, and terrified of losing—had recklessly swallowed his pride whole and bravely stepped forward to face the risk of being rejected by Elodie. Raphael didn’t run away anymore.
If my little brother—the biggest coward when it comes to matters of the heart—finally found the courage to take a step forward... Raveena bit her lower lip hard until it stung. ...then why am I, a grand mage and his older sister, running away like a coward?!
"The train doors will close shortly. Please board immediately!" the conductor shouted.
Caelus looked at Raveena for the very last time. The man carved a faint smile. He turned his back, lifting his foot onto the steps of the metal carriage.
Tap. Tap. Tap!
The sharp, rapid clacking of high heels sprinting desperately suddenly sliced through the noise of the station.
"Caelus! Wait!!"
Caelus gasped. He whipped his head around.
Raveena was sprinting through the crowd of passengers. Shouldering past several merchants without a care. The woman was panting heavily. Her black hair whipped wildly behind her back.
Right as the carriage doors began to hiss and close automatically, Raveena lunged inside and slammed hard into Caelus’s chest. Thump!
Caelus staggered backward, catching the woman with both arms. "R-Raveena?! What are you—"
"I’m coming with you," Raveena interrupted, panting heavily as she buried her face in his chest.
Caelus swallowed hard. His eyes widened in disbelief. "Are you... are you absolutely sure about this decision?"
Raveena looked up. Her tear-streaked blue eyes looked straight into her lover’s eyes.
"No. I am not sure at all," Raveena answered with a genuine, liberating smile. "But... I am far more terrified of dying with the regret of never having the courage to walk by your side."
Pshhht! The train’s hydraulic doors finally sealed shut, locking the two of them inside the carriage.
The hum of the mana-engine roared higher. VWUUUMMMM! The colossal metal train began to accelerate, gliding smoothly through the evening wind, hurtling toward the Southern territories.
Through the glass window of the speeding carriage, Raveena looked outside. She watched the silhouetted shadow of the Iron Hearth Castle and the rooftops of the Seruni Academy slowly shrink into the distance, until they finally vanished, swallowed completely by the twilight mist.