SSS-Class Suicide Hunter

The principal of the orphanage I grew up with was ignorant in good words and bad words.

The children at the orphanage grumbled about it.

Our birthdays are January 1st, right?

- It's a lot of birthdays.

- What's my name? Kim Man-ja.

- Hey, you guys are naturally attached even when Mr. Kim is around. I'm Kim Han Bi... Let's just call it a hanbi.

That's what I thought. Ever since I entered the tower, I've been thinking that.

But when you meet a lot of people, you meet a swordsman, you meet a teacher, you meet Raviel, you meet a lot of people, and now you think again,

- What's wrong with the Prelate?

He seemed always concerned and wary that you love us too much, even though it may seem strange to say this.

- Don't you love us, Prelate?

I remembered the conversation I had with the principal the day I inherited my middle school uniform.

The Prelate asked me a question and took me seriously, and said [just wait a day]. Whenever I was asked a serious question, the principal always suspended [just wait a day].

And I answered.

- You asked me yesterday. Why don't you love me a little more?

- Yes...

Over the course of the day, I felt sorry for myself for asking such a question. But the principal kept telling me the story of the day, as if he didn't care about my sorry heart.

It's easy to pretend to have people. That's the easiest thing in the world. Pretending to be smart, pretending to be strong, pretending to be kind, pretending to really know something.... You tell your friends, right? I named you Seong-hyun, too. All grown-ups do.

The Prelate washed the water.

- They're all wearing masks. You don't have to take this mask off. But once you get too used to it, at some point you forget the fact that you're wearing a mask. You forget. That's drunk.

The Prelate looked carefully at my face.

It was the look in my eyes to see if I was following the story.

- Imagine that. If I'm annoyed in front of you, what do you think?

- Oh, the Prelate is stressed out today...?

- Yeah, that's it.

The Prelate smiles.

- I'm sorry, I do that sometimes.

He did it once a month.

- Anyway, the important thing is that I'm annoyed with you sometimes, and you know that very well. That's who I am. You know me.

But, and the Prelate said,

- What if I've always loved you? What if someone always told you that I love you, smiled at you and hugged you that you were worth my life? What if I, who I am, piss you off about once a year?

The Prelate shakes her head.

- And then you think, [Why would the Prelate be mad at us? You don't understand. Because you think I love you the most.

[The Prelate says he loves us the most, so why get angry?]

-.......

- You're young. So in the end, all I can think about is the easiest answer. [Oh, I must have done something wrong.]

The Prelate shudders a little.

- Even if I'm annoyed once a year, it's an accomplice. Look, 10 years, 10 times. Five if you remember half of 10. And five memories, enough to determine a person's personality.

And the Prelate remained silent for a while.

- Don't do that.

The Prelate mutters.

- Remember me as a stressed and annoyed person. Think of it as annoying even throwing a birthday party. That's the truth. Don't blame you. You didn't do anything wrong. Don't be twisted by guys like me.

-.......

- You can be strong. Be strong as you can.

The ledger room had A4 paper copied to the printer attached to the wall. It was hung right across from the Prelate's desk, and it seemed like a good background. As a result of the wallpaper or plaid, it is always there.

But that day I looked at the poisonous A4 paper.

+

I want everyone to have a human life.

Based on human dignity and the belief in social justice,

with individuals, families, groups, organizations, communities, and the whole community.

I have always stood by those who have been forsaken and afflicted.

And those who guard their rights and their private parts.

reject the injustice and denial of society,

Put public interests ahead of personal interests

By following your social worker's Code of Conduct,

Dedicated as a social worker with morality and accountability

I solemnly swear on my honor and my free will.

+

I looked at the Prelate.

-.......

The Prelate glances quietly into the air as if he was troubled.

Black eyes.

Those eyes remain in my memory.

2.

“I'm sorry, Raviel. I can't go to school with you today. ”

I came out to the gate.

"Hmm."

Raviel looked at me. Raviel's gaze slowly lowers.

There was my hand. I was also held by someone other than myself.

"......."

It was a gentle hand.

Killer City was dragged here with my hands held. I didn't ask him where he was taking me, not why he was holding my hand.

I just keep my head down.

“…… my boyfriend sometimes exhibits strange movement. It's almost like a miracle. I think that's a great thing about boyfriends. ”

Raviel mutters.

“Suit yourself. Suit yourself. Is there anything I can do to help? ”

“Not yet, but I'll let you know as soon as I do. ”

“I'll believe you. Always.”

Raviel kissed my forehead. And without hesitation, he turned around and rode the limo. The limousine was driven by a steward who resembled the Grand Chamberlain of the Empire, and disappeared across the street.

“Well, of course. ”

I turned my back on killing nature.

“Let's go.”

“…… to where? ”

“To your house. ”

"......."

He hesitated for the first time. I felt bored too. But my thoughts were firm. I was going to meet his parents first and apologize first.

‘I don't know where to start. ’

Of course, apologizing doesn't end this [trauma]. It cannot be resolved. As the difficulty increased, it seemed that the trauma itself had changed like a stage to be solved.

‘Let's do one thing at a time. ’

Like always.

However, my attempt to resolve the trauma was frustrated from the start.

“…… here. ”

I lost my horse after seeing [home] guided by Killer City.

It was a dump.

Beneath the foothills, there is an empty void where pine trees settle. The vacant lot was a small trash can in the city. There was a huge pile of abandoned pets, dirty Styrofoam, and piles of paper.

In the middle of it is a shack.

[■ ■ Lives in garbage. Interiors and uniforms are all recycled. There is only one piece of waste that cannot be recycled.]

My head is tingling.

I thought it was just maliciously overwhelming.

Bastards.

“What about your parents? Do you work? ”

The shack was not a sanctuary, but a refuge. The wall couldn't reach the roof, so the hole was punctured. The roof was covered in grey vinyl.

“My father collects and sells scraps. ”

Plastic garbage surrounds the woodshed like a moat. Unlike the rest of the garbage around the shed, the plastic surrounding the shed was stripped of labels.

It was clean.

Because of that, the plank house seemed to be floating on a white plastic sand beach.

“What about your mother?”

“Nothing.”

"......."

Yeah, it is.

"■ ■ Is this your friend? ”

After waiting for two hours, his father came home. He was a poor man, but he was more oppressed by life than poverty. I knew it as soon as I saw it.

A tiny single room.

Sometimes I looked in the mirror.

“No, I'm not a friend. ”

"Hmm…?"

The old man narrows his eyes. I looked too old for someone who had a high school kid.

He resembles an old sailor's face that I peered into trauma at Thousand Drinks Rock.

“I'm the one who beat and tortured this child. ”

“Hmm...?"

The old man stares blankly.

"......."

It took me a minute to realize that I had started talking to the old man.

‘Too late.'

It's too late.

The old man before me was already worn out and had no wick to burn his heart with. Unlike I used to live in a single room. That was the difference between me and this man back then.

We didn't know where the difference came from.

“Here's the evidence. If you look at the phone, there are texts. If you look at this..."

One thing's for sure.

This man has no power to take responsibility for his mortality.

"Hmm."

I showed him everything I could right now. Seeing the hell his son is enduring, the gum, the gum, the old man closed his eyes.

“I see... ”

The old man stared at me.

As soon as I finished talking, the old man stopped fighting. It was like the whole conversation was over. The old man just waited for me to say more, or else I waited for nothing.

He didn't seem to have anything to say to me.

"Hmm."

I looked at the color of tenderness. He did not look at his father. It was not a face that was shocked or insulted by the conversation just now. He sits quietly on the floor.

It seems natural that things will flow.

‘Yes.'

That's it.

“I've had a lot of excuses. ”

I stood up and bowed to the old man.

“If you don't mind, I'd like to stay with your children for a while. I'd like to invite you to my home. Is that okay?”

“Of course... ”

The old man clearly did not understand my words. I was powerless. But I explained it not for the old man, but for the mortal several times.

“You may be staying a little longer in my house. A week, a month. Maybe longer than that. On weekends and Saturday evenings, I will visit you and tell you how your children are doing. Father, will you be all right? ”

“Yes, of course. ”

Okay. Okay.

I looked back at Killnathan.

“Let's go.”

"......."

“Pack your things. Like I told my father, he might be staying at my house for a while. ”

He glanced up at me.

“What are you trying to do? ”

It was not a word of respect that came out of the mouths of the dead.

“Now that you're marrying a rich girl, are you laundering the past? You think we'll get in trouble later? Smart.”

My heart ached.

“Or is this a new game? If you want to play, just say you want to play. Tell me what you're playing at. Don't bother. I'll play again. Do you want to go to the playground at night? ”

His voice was blunt. There was no bending. That was the voice of a human who chose to crash himself the day before.

“I'm sorry.”

“Are you crazy? You're crazy. Kim Gong-ja.”

“Just give me one day. Please, I'll do whatever it takes. Please just hold on for one more day. ”

"......."

It was one of many days for me to live, but it was the last one for the person in front of me.

I had no choice but to hope. I had to ask. There was nothing I could do other than wish and pray for.

“Take care of it... Whatever you want.”

You mutter tiredly.

I grabbed her wrist and headed home. I had to go through school to stumble across paths I didn't know. It was only after sunset that the sky became dim that we arrived at the house.

“Wait here for a moment. ”

“I'll be right back. In 20 minutes. Will you wait for me in the meantime?”

“Do whatever you want... ”

I left Killnathan on the side of the road and headed home first.

“Oh.”

There was a messenger in the yard. The messenger listened to the whiskey cup, whether he was alone looking up at the night sky.

“Hello, son. You're a little late today. Heheh. You can't be late to play because you have a girlfriend, right? Just so you know, after you graduate from high school, be serious. There's nothing good about getting between people on a speed pedal. ”

Sword. My partner.

Someone who taught me how to look ahead.

In this world of mine,

“Father.”

“…… huh? ”

The messenger blinks.

“Oh, is that weird? It's a little weird to call you Dad. It's not a bit strange, it's a lot awkward... It's just awkward because the chicken's just gone up. Oh, is this because you're so drunk? ”

“Father.”

I called him once again.

“You couldn't have raised me like this. ”

“What?"

“The father I know is a great man. He's a scary guy. He looks like a psychopath, but he's a little bit of a psychopath, but at least he ends up where he thinks he's [this is not]. ”

The messenger slashed his eyebrows.

“What are you talking about... son? ”

“If you were my father, I wouldn't grow up a gangster. We have to get off the road. But before you do, you're gonna have to squeeze. Even if it kills me in half, they'll bring me back. ”

You are such a person.

“Well, I was torturing a weak child... and then I tried to kill myself. That.”

I heard there are a lot of people messing around with it.

Things I can't even pronounce in front of me make a fuss with my fingers.

"Ew. Those guys need to cut off all their fingers.

“You can't say that. You're not just a man who can do that. You are a person who vows to teach you how to be happy when you see someone who is suffering. ”

"......."

“I am the kind of man you despise the most. You don't call a man like that" son. "It's impossible. It's an impossible world. ”

The night sky was still sinking.

In the courtyard, where there is no sound of a bug, I look directly at the messenger.

And I said,

“You are not a sword. ”

"......."

“Get lost. In front of me, now. ”

At that moment.

- ■ ■ ■ ■ ■.

The messenger's body collapses.

The skin drips. The bone melts. Everything that was made of blood evaporated. When I close my eyes, there's something there that I don't know about. Only the sobbing shadow is like a ghost.

- ■ ■ ■ ■, ■ ■....

I couldn't understand what it was saying. I couldn't even recognize his face. But I knew it was a stranger to my father.

It was the embarrassment of this world.

"......."

I passed the messenger and entered the house.

“Welcome. Confucius.”

On the living room couch, the teacher sat down.

With a face and a face that I thought I would never see again.

“How was school today, my son? ”

The teacher smiles softly.