Tensei Shitanode Tsugi Koso wa Shiawasena Jinsei wo Tsukande Misemashou

After all, Jill just didn't say anything to me, as if to avoid decisive words.

Clear words are not spoken, they are like tears, even if they are. I don't give a word to the habit of looking straight. As much as I wanted you to notice, I saw more than a few glances swinging at the chisel.

I don't know how I can be any better at the distance that will surely come a little closer, even as I am relieved by a relationship that is no different from when I didn't realize it.

Much more than in the past... Jill comes looking for my side. I feel hiccups by the purity without a back, and it's hard to kick it with respect at the earliest. I can't get my fever-pregnated eyes pointed at me and cut and throw away that it's just love.

I'm just confused that I haven't been able to organize myself to accept that as a love affair.

It's obvious, you've always been on my side, and you're the one who's been suffering with me. Even though you're the one who's been taking care of me since I was old enough to count with one hand. Even though he's the one who has been embarrassed to sleep with his stomach rounded out, lonely and crying, and all sorts of pathetic looks.

... I didn't want to believe that you wanted me as a heterosexual.

But the reality is ruthless, and let's just say the facts are stranger than the novel. What's for sure is that Jill likes herself a lot.

I don't know if they will one day, but I realized I was looking at myself that way. He said there are times when he sees her as a woman, not as the Lord. Why didn't you notice?

... If you looked at it objectively, those words and actions must be going too far. Normal servants don't kiss primarily, and they don't look at thirst like they want to.

And I was used to it and allowed deviant behavior, too, and I was asking. I don't try to realize that fact, and I'm aware that you're running away.

Then what about yourself, being turned towards such emotions?

Never, I don't hate it. Humanly, I love Jill, and he's fun and comfortable on his side. Even if you kiss me, that's embarrassing, but I don't hate it, and I'm happy to be gently touched.

But I don't know if you like it clearly, and I'm so worried. I didn't think that the sentiment of liking was a difficult one to discern and accept so far.

I can't even find the thread to solve it unless the answer comes back where I asked myself. On the contrary, I'm shy and itchy and my head is messed up and my thoughts don't get wrapped up well.

Has it ever been so thought-provoking? Thinking about other people so much, facing yourself, trying to find answers to yourself.

Unprecedented information, facts and shame are pushing me like a tsunami, and my head is going to flake. I'm going to drown, kidnapped by a wave of emotions I can't even control myself. Even with this wave close to hot water, we don't even have straw to grab and we can't solve it.

But I don't take Jill's presence lightly enough to throw it out. Although the reality is that if you want to find an answer before they send you a clear word, you can't.

"... jiru silly"

Exhales mixed with whining voices, hot.

While falling asleep in bed and looking up at the ceiling, I reiterate the fact that I am deprived of my body's freedom by the heat that turns all over my body instead of my breath.

... It's a really pitiful story, but yeah, they reached the tolerance limit as a result of continuing to worry, and the body seems to have issued SOS asking me to stop worrying. Troubled with boredom at night, my body complained of malaise when I woke up.

I'm aware that mental fatigue caused by just too much worries, even if I don't see a doctor. That's why you're telling Maria to leave it there. I don't even have to call a doctor, and I don't want to call you for this.

With that said, something similar happened before. When you were ten, you had a fever because you were seriously worried about what Jill said.

"If you don't find someone like that, I'll take you away."

... Oh, since this time Jill has been my thing...?

In retrospect, you say you've been approached quite a bit for a long time, or you feel like you've been shaking between your main obedience and that kind of emotion since that time, and your fever comes up again.

Let's calm down, if you turn up any more fever, they'll really call a doctor. I can't tell you that I had a fever for some very dumb reason. I wonder if you're boiling your head, maybe it's actually boiling.

No, it wasn't clear these days. In retrospect, it's to the extent that I'm shaking in the narrow space, it really doesn't seem like I liked it or that much as a heterosexual. You wouldn't ask for heterosexuality from a 10-year-old Peppa in the first place, although I'm pretty sure she was humanly liked.

So, when did it become clear?

The sound of a knock sounding in the room pauses the thought before an answer is given to a storm of questions that is blowing inside.

"Dear Liz,"

My heart beats faster in an instant because it was the person in the matter who heard me coming from across the door.

Is it a good time or a bad time, or do you think so because I'm constantly worried? You visit when you don't really want to meet each other, so I don't know how to handle it.

But I'm not going to refuse, and if I take a deep breath and then prompt you to "go ahead," the door opens without letting my hair in. Naturally, you will see from behind it a shaken cuisine.

I was worried to see Jill in the morning, whether he was listening to her or detecting her condition with his face.... you have one end of the cause, I can't say very well.

"How are you doing?"

"... hey, I'm fine"

Fortunately, the red tide on your cheeks can be deluded because you have a fever. If Jill snorted asleep while realizing it might be slightly too much, Jill wouldn't pursue it there either. A "good" word.

I smile slightly down and walk over here.

If you try to get up, you will be controlled by your hands, and if you remain at rest, you will be gently embarrassed. That care helps, but do you say you're ashamed because you feel your gaze straight?

"Please sleep with adults, you must have been tired too"

"... I'll do that"

Whose fault is it, I can't tell you because it's like eight hits at the same time. Because it's causing a dumb situation where I get bored and fever on my own.

So, but Jill's a surprise, or Jill's... it's a bad idea to see him so much in love. You've decided to think deeply, if you look at me like that.

Half of it is Jill's fault, and looking up at Jill as he shifts responsibility just a little bit on his own, he loosens his worrying look and now shapes his bitter smile.

"What's wrong?

"Nothing."

"Really? With such a stubborn glance, you wouldn't be complaining if you didn't tell me, would you?

"I'm not obstinate."

"Hehe, I hope so"

Kusu, I still don't feel like enemies to Jill, who just laughed and showed it with pleasure with his breath. I feel ashamed that they are discerning why, even though I don't remember mouthing this awful emotion.

The complaint is smoking again in the back of my chest without coming out of my mouth, but Jill just stroked my cheek softly and it got foggy.

It gives you the comfort in front of your fingertips. Just be caressed to rinse and spoil with the joints of your fingers, and the odd satisfaction fills the back of your chest instead of panning.

Usually my warm hands are limp all day and it feels so good.

"... n"

The only thing that made me squeal my throat like a cat and narrow my eyes is called habit.

It gets sweet on.

Why do I allow myself to be so touched? I know I can't, but I like it when my fingertips look at my skin. The exquisite stroke will take away all the vigilance, or the ever stained feeling that "being stroked by Jill is a daily tea meal" will make it so.

I don't hate being touched by Jill, and I feel good about Ning Ro. It's limp now, but usually warm and fluffy. Jill, who knows I prefer human skin, knows the extent to which I don't like it and also knows how to be happy.

That's why it feels so good and makes me laugh. Maybe I'm doing this on purpose to put you to sleep.

"... Jill is..."

"Yes."

"Do you touch me, Suki?

The fingertip movement stopped perfectly, then laughed bitterly. Your face slowly turns into a form of laughter so that there are different waves spreading across the quiet lake.

"I sound like a little pervert, but I'm happy to touch you."

The whispers that slip into my ears are terribly sweet.

Even if you say you have a fever, if you are directed at such a caged, loving voice, the fever will go up again. Even though I heard it from myself, I didn't think the response was such a sweet word.

It's embarrassing and feels like my head came to my mind if it also affected the heat that lives in my body. I don't know what to think, fluffy...... good, I can't grasp it.

Fever rising and strange flaccidity, then weird floating sensation. Must be the heat. Jill's sweet voice is bad.

"I like to be touched by Jill, too"

Words that rubbed through my control were meant for nature and Jill.

"... it's a profound word, Master Liz"

Jill laughed bitterly at the words she answered with her own mouth. No, my eyes are too feverish to call it a bitter laugh and my cheeks are loose.

A slightly illuminated look, as if my fever had shifted.

Jill, too, you just have to feel a little embarrassed. You're bothering me so much, you're a little mean.

"... you're so cute and I don't know what to do sometimes. I'm always flirting with Master Liz."

Jill with an indescribably complicated grin and then stroking her cheek again.

It's me who's flirting. You make me think about Jill so much, sometimes. Don't say that habitual decisive word, just confuse me.... Thats what I'm thankful for and at the same time I want a clear answer.

It must be contradictory, I am. Because he wants to know the answer to the habit of wanting to escape.

If you're blurry and looking up at Jill, Jill's palms will slowly hit your forehead. To a limp palm, if you say so, you should have asked for a wet towel, what a reminder now.

"Rest well, Master Liz, and rest well."

To a serene voice, consciousness goes away naturally. It's like being dragged into sleep, falling more and more from the edge of consciousness into the sea of sleep.

In my consciousness where tiredness also twitches out and fades into body fatigue and heat, the last thing I saw was a grin mixed with joy and loneliness and a slight lip movement.

"... I..."

Before I heard that, my consciousness fell into the white sea.