The CEO's Rose

Vivian’s POV

The way people processed hurt was really something. Back at the hospital, Vivian had truly believed that once her body healed, she would be perfectly fine. That the moment her entire body stopped aching and she was finally able to speak again, she would shake off everything that had happened and all would be well in her world.

But now here she was, her body no longer in as much pain, her voice back, if a bit raspier than she was used to, and instead of feeling fine, Vivian was somehow feeling worse.

At the hospital, given the near constant supervision of the nurses, the way that Ryan had always wanted to be by her side, plus Mark and Amy taking turns to spend time with her. Vivian had cherished the small moments that she had gotten to be alone. But now that she was at the penthouse, any time that she was on her own, Vivian panicked, honest to goodness panic. To her it now felt like any silence was a precursor to doom. Like if it was too quiet, there was a predator waiting in the shadows, just ready to snatch her up and devour her.

Logically she knew that that was not going to happen. But that did not stop her from stressing that it would. Always having background noise playing, be it soft music or white noise helped. Another thing that she’d found useful was having something of Ryan’s on hand, being surrounded by his strong masculine scent, did wonders when it came to reassuring her that she was safe.

***

But even with making sure that there was always sound and with Ryan’s scent surrounding her, Vivian still struggled. She found herself jumpier than she had ever been.

Her emotions were all over the place. When she had video called her class to show them that she was truly fine. She had been laughing and smiling throughout the entirety of the call. But the moment that it had ended, she had burst into tears and had been unable to stop crying no matter how much she had tried. Then she had gone from being said to feeling unbelievable anger towards Bryce, cursing the man for daring to lay hands on her and wishing him nothing but all of the worst things in life, to feeling really low.

The anger quickly giving way to her feeling guilt for having not been strong enough to defend herself and scaring Ryan, since the man had had to rescue her and then just stay by her side, not knowing whether she was going to make it or not.

Had it been just one incident, Vivian would have been able to quickly get over it. But more and more she was realizing that she went through an entire cyclone of emotions at the smallest things. Even the sight of her own phone had triggered her once when she had recalled how Bryce had kept it from her. She had even caught herself shedding silent tears while on a call with Ryan’s grandfather.

It was not a sustainable way to live and Vivian had made a promise to herself. If the symptoms persisted, she was going to talk to someone. But before she took that step, she would try to work things out on her own and see if she could not overcome the hurdle without needing to talk to anyone. From the stories that she’d heard, from other trauma survivors, she knew that that would be very difficult, but she was willing to try.

***

In addition to her still aching body, and her mood swings, Vivian now also had a lot of nightmares to contend with.

For the most part, sharing a bed with Ryan helped, even if his presence did not stop her from having bad dreams, more often than not when she woke up in the middle of the night after a really bad dream, being in Ryan’s arms, often helped her fall back asleep. But that night, things were different. Vivian’s nightmare had felt so real. No matter how much she had clung to Ryan, she had been unable to fall back asleep.

So now she was sitting out on the balcony, a blanket around her shoulders as she stared at the city. If she squinted her eyes and tilted her head just so, she could convince herself that all of the lights were actually stars and all she had to do was reach out and she would be able to touch them.

Having not wanted to disturb Ryan, Vivian was resigned to spending the night there, just staring at fake stars. But half an hour after she left the bedroom, Ryan joined her.

"Nightmares?" He asked, not even trying to deny it, Vivian nodded. "I dreamt that he came for me again, but this time I didn’t fight back. I just stood there and let him strangle me to death," Taking a seat next to her, Ryan took her hand in his, his thumb running over her fingers, he began speaking softly. "I have nightmares too. Only in mine, you fought with everything you had, and it is I who failed you, allowing him to finish you off,"

Vivian’s heart ached at hearing his words. "But you did not fail me, you came right in the nick of time and you fought him off,"

Ryan nodded, "I know, and that’s what helps me deal with the dreams. What about you? You do realize that you did not just stand there and take it right. You fought with everything you had, and that allowed me to come in and save you. Both of us did our best. We just have to keep reminding ourselves of that until our brains realize that it is true, and stop trying to punish us with things that never happened," Squeezing the hand that was holding hers, Vivian suddenly felt as though Ryan had transferred some of his strength to her.

He was right.

She had fought to save herself and Ryan had fought to save her as well. She just had to keep that in mind, and day by day things would get easier.

The two of them stayed out in the balcony for a few more minutes, then with Ryan’s arms around her, they walked back to bed and when they settled in, neither of them stirred until late next morning. The two of them finally getting some much needed and interrupted sleep.

***

The next morning, while the couple slept, another couple was walking through the woods using a trail that very few people ever did.

" I think that we are lost," The young lady said, but her boyfriend would not listen.

"No, we are not. I read the map. Look, we just have to go a few more paces and then-" Whatever else he was about to see was cut off when the wind suddenly changed direction and brought with it a foul smell. Instantly leaning over and throwing up, the young man glared in the direction that the stench had come from.

"Oh my goodness, what is that? Do you think a bear died over there or something?" Turning to look at his partner, he found her face pale.

"What?" He asked. Not saying a word the young lady lifted her hand and pointed. Shifting his eyes to where she was indicating the young man squinted into the trees. When he finally saw what she was seeing he staggered back.

Swinging gently on the branch of a tree, was a human body. It might have been a man, but given how bloated it was, the couple could not be too sure. But what they were certain of, was the fact that they needed to get away from there and call the police.