The Forest Feeds No Idle Goblins

"Holy Water?" Shire’s brow furrowed when he heard the word. "What is that? Do you have to drink it before every battle? Do the Earth Goblins drink it too?"

The rapid-fire questions sent Cyan Hide into silence again, but this time he quickly answered Shire. "Holy Water is something the Evil Throat Army gives us to drink. The Earth Goblins don’t drink it. Before every battle, some goblins are forced to drink it. And not a single one of the goblins who drank the Holy Water has ever returned."

"Have you seen what they look like after they drink the Holy Water?" Shire recalled the red-skinned goblins he’d seen earlier. ’That must be the effect of the Holy Water,’ he thought.

"No," Cyan Hide shook his head. "They’re called out to battle by the ’Military Leaders,’ and no one ever comes back. Not a single one."

"Military Leaders?" Shire looked at the goblin before him. "Is that a title those Earth Goblins came up with for themselves?"

"Yes, we have a total of..." Cyan Hide glanced at his hands, then down at his toes. "We have twelve Military Leaders in all. They’re all Earth Goblins, and each one commands a number of Slave Soldiers equal to all the fingers and toes of two goblins."

Shire did some quick mental math. "So you have about 500 goblins?"

"I don’t know," Cyan Hide said quietly. It was true; these goblins really couldn’t count any number higher than they had fingers and toes.

’Five hundred,’ Shire thought, his eyes sparkling. With that many goblins, he could finally organize his forces properly. He was currently short-handed, and his goblins had to switch tasks daily. For example, the warriors under Red Eyes not only had to train but were also responsible for protecting the herb-gathering parties and the daily hunt. Meanwhile, the "civil engineering" goblins following One-Eyed to dig tunnels sometimes had to be pulled away to go on patrol with Broken Tooth.

If he had five hundred goblins, he could form a dedicated combat unit. The remaining herb-gathering and engineering teams could be fully staffed, ending the "goblins are bricks to be moved wherever there’s a hole" situation.

"What is this Holy Water the Earth Goblins make you drink?" Shire asked, calming his excitement.

"I don’t know. I just heard it from Scarface. He told us that if we didn’t behave, the Military Leaders would choose us for battle," Cyan Hide said quietly.

"Scarface?"

"The goblin who escaped," Cyan Hide affirmed with a nod, gritting his teeth.

Shire recalled what Broken Tooth had told him about the first time he’d encountered these goblins. He narrowed his eyes. "So he’s a ’Brother-in-law’."

"So that’s why you were so hesitant and afraid when I first gave you that honeyed water to drink, isn’t it?" he said with a smile.

"Yes," Cyan Hide nodded. They had indeed been terrified of the steaming water in the wooden bowls. It was mainly because they had heard too many stories and seen too many of their comrades get dragged away by the Earth Goblins, never to be seen again.

"Why didn’t you try to escape?" Shire asked, looking at the goblin before him.

"We can’t," Cyan Hide bit his lip. "Some tried, but they were caught and brought back. There are Ogres in the area. Anyone who’s recaptured is hacked to pieces by the Earth Goblins in front of everyone. And if someone actually escapes and isn’t caught, all the goblins from their tunnel are immediately chosen for battle. Then... none of them come back."

Hearing this, Shire instantly understood their predicament. ’Getting caught while escaping means public torture. But if you actually succeed, everyone in your tunnel gets sent out as cannon fodder. In a system like that, the goblins would all spy on each other. The moment anyone made a suspicious move, someone else would surely report them.’

’Living like that for too long would make anyone numb. I used to live on the brink of death too, but at least I could still forage for food and raid birds’ nests. As long as I hid well, I could live happily. I remember Bai Mao jumping for joy after finding some tasty fruit. But Cyan Hide’s life... he’s just a tool waiting to die.’

"So why were you unwilling to tell me about the Evil Throat Army before?" Shire asked, leaning back in his chair and lacing his fingers together over his chest.

"Everyone would die," Cyan Hide said quietly. "As long as you don’t go near the Evil Throat Army, we won’t be sent out to fight, we won’t have to drink the Holy Water, and we won’t die."

"But that ’Brother-in-law’—Scarface, wasn’t it?—he’s already escaped. If he runs back to the Evil Throat Army, I’m sure they’ll come straight for us," Shire said calmly, looking at Cyan Hide.

"Scarface..." Cyan Hide’s brow furrowed. His hands gripped the cup so tightly they began to tremble. "He can’t... He will... No..."

Shire watched the conflicted, stammering goblin before him. ’I have to admit, I kind of like this guy. For the sake of his comrades back in the tunnel, he resisted the temptation of a full belly and warm clothes instead of spilling everything right away. You don’t see many goblins like that.’

’The clans I’ve absorbed in the past all surrendered quickly. There were even oddballs like Scarface. But I’ve never met one who thought about the other goblins in their group. Maybe it’s because all the goblins under the Evil Throat Army’s Enslavement share the same miserable fate.’

"A reign of terror," Shire said, rubbing his temples. ’The natural history books were right. This is the only trick military organizations run by Earth Goblins know how to play.’

"Did you ever try to escape all at once?" he asked aloud. "If all the goblins ran, the Earth Goblins wouldn’t be able to catch everyone. Even with Ogres roaming about, they probably wouldn’t kill all of you, right?"

"I don’t know," Cyan Hide said after a few seconds of thought. "We never tried. We’d be assigned to patrol around the tunnels. If you caught an escaped goblin, you’d be rewarded with food."

"Besides, escaping means death. If you’re careful, you can stay alive." His voice grew quieter and quieter, eventually trailing off into nothing.

"The difference between dying sooner and dying later," Shire said calmly, twiddling his thumbs. "You’re all cowards, so after seeing a few brutal killings, you don’t dare to run. You just hope you’re lucky enough not to be picked as cannon fodder by the Earth Goblins, so you can live a little longer. Some, like Scarface, even become a ’Brother-in-law’ and get rewarded with food."

"But luck always runs out. Whether you’re the one chosen, or all the goblins are herded onto the front lines, or even if an Earth Goblin just doesn’t like the look of you, you’ll end up getting hacked to death," Shire thought. ’It reminds me of my past life, of those tyrannical lords and warlords. They treated the common folk the same way. But goblins have it even worse than commoners. The Earth Goblins probably kill them without needing any reason at all.’

"This way... you stay alive," Cyan Hide whispered. This, perhaps, was the method of survival the goblins had slowly groped their way toward under the Evil Throat Army’s rule.

"So if the Evil Throat Army fights several consecutive battles, doesn’t that mean the number of goblins would drop significantly? I believe you fought several times against those Centaurs." Shire stared at Cyan Hide. ’Those Earth Goblins definitely aren’t like the generals of old who ’cherished their soldiers like sons’.’

"We’re constantly getting new goblins," Cyan Hide said, taking a small sip of his tea in an attempt to calm himself.

"Constantly getting new ones?" Shire was taken aback. ’Where are these Earth Goblins capturing so many goblins from?’

"Yeah. We were all kicked out. We’re the trash the Kingdom didn’t want. After we ran, we were all captured by the Evil Throat Army," Cyan Hide said, a lonely look on his face as he tried to recall the past.

"Kingdom? What Kingdom?" Shire leaned forward, his hands gripping the arms of his chair, and stared intently at the goblin before him.

"The Kingdom to the north of the Evil Throat Army. The goblin Kingdom." As he spoke, Cyan Hide lowered his head.