The Inner Palace Tale of a Villainess Noble Girl

... I knew it. I've been aware of this for a long time.

"Kai" is not good. Kai is good. I'm glad Kai's here. "

What is that "thoughts" that want only one warmth, just one?

Just meeting and talking doesn't mean you want to be personally close to someone you're worried about! If I hadn't been a "red rose", I'd have refused to see you a long time ago!!

If I wasn't a "red rose" - why did I shake that deep part of my heart into the words I released myself?

"... His Royal Highness is also terrified. That person's thoughts toward me are as beautiful as a sharp, cruel ice pillar. Even though it's terrible, I can't help admiring its clear beauty."

Why were you so afraid to confront Exiga's heart?

And...

"As long as Dee wants, I'll be by Dee's side."

"If you've been near the center of the country for more than a year, and you've been staring at the girl running around for the country and the people behind you and wondering what to do to keep her smiling..."

"Whether I care about Dee or think about Dee all the time, I'm doing it on my own."

Whenever that person indicated that they were "together" in words and attitudes, they were wrapped in comfort that could not be said, and the reason for that.

... I knew it. In words, I can explain in just one word.

--Once you fall in love. I just can't stand wanting to talk to someone else. I can't afford to think about the other person's mind, drowning in their body and mind, smiling and tearing at the same time... it's like I don't see anything else, but I just want one of them -

As the words of Exiga that I heard earlier go round and round, they turn around in your head.

I don't need other people's warmth. --Because I only want one.

If the "position" hadn't controlled me - if it weren't for the "red rose", I would have been unable to suppress my own emotions sooner and reached out as I wanted.

Faced with a straight and serious affection - no, but knowing the shape of the "affection", you have to realize that there is the same thing in you.

--As long as that affectionate person stays beside me from kindness and kindness... we can do the same time together. We can stay together.

Yes... I knew it, all of it.

--Let's go someday. Look at "Shoji", the house that used it, and the town. If you can't imagine, it's faster to actually see it, right?

I made a promise that day under the stars. Not only do you want to go to Shoji sometime, but you also want to see a world you don't know.

- Let's go, together.

That guy... he was so special because he swore "with Kai".

As long as there's that promise. Until then, I'll keep that promise.

Kai stays beside me.... I thought you'd stay with me.

(This is...!)

I didn't want to notice.

I shouldn't have noticed.

That's why I closed the lid. --I sealed this "thoughts".

(I, Kai....!

If you realize... if you reveal the identity of this "thoughts", you will surely be unable to let go of Kai. I knew it, so I ran away.

Kai has a life of Kai. Until he met Diana, he was a freelancer.... no, he's still free. He will only be by Diana's side with free will.

Because I'm not tied to anyone... one day, Kai will have the freedom to leave Diana if he meets something more fascinating than being next to her.

At that time, I had to seal the feeling of miss so that he wouldn't cry and lean - so that he wouldn't be pulled back by his gentle hair.

And yet...!

(I can't think about the other person's mind. You just want it. I can't control it. If you say it like that... if you say it clearly, you can't escape no matter how you scratch your feet anymore...)

Is this love?

Is it true that such selfish, arrogant and violent thoughts are love?

The feeling of wanting just one person forever is pure without mixing up...

(The desire for high purity is no different from the poison....)

Like my father, a rational man would have been better.... then you must have made a gentle love that respects the other person's feelings above all else.

Like my brother, I would have liked a strong man.... then I must have been able to control my arrogant self and make a peaceful love to live for the happiness of my loved one.

Diana, who has always lived with her selfishness, is not accustomed to enduring what she wants. --If you realize it, you can't help but want it.

(No, I can't.)

Someone who found a wish he didn't even realize and put it on his palm.

One who always takes for granted Diana's most desirable words.

--I don't know how much you've helped Kai with what he gave you. I've been saved beyond words.

Before anything like love, Kai was Diana's benefactor.... one important person.

Kai always wishes Diana happiness, but Kai is the one who absolutely must be happy.

Don't just disturb his happiness.... don't tie him free.

(And yet...!!)

I haven't seen my face in five days, just like this. I'm lonely, I'm lonely, I can't stand it.

Still, if the lid stays closed, I can still endure it. He kept running away from the identity of his "thoughts".

--If it stays closed.

(If you're in love with such thoughts. I...!!)

With the box completely open in her heart, Diana just ran away.

--I don't remember the details of how and when I got off the horse.

"Rita!!

"Dear Deanna!?

With a desolate heart, Diana ran back to Lars' Imperial Palace, his given room, and jumped to Rita, who was tidying up the room by herself.

Rita, who seems to have been stunned by surprise, staggers backwards, but flips her body with her reflex nerve to kill Diana's momentum and support her as it is.

"Dear Deanna... what's wrong?

"Rita....."

"... did the Crown Prince force you to do something ruthless?

"Chiga... Rita...!

Confused minds don't even think of words, and Diana can only repeat Rita's name... the name of someone she trusts and trusts more than anyone else.

She stuck to Rita and trembled like she was holding something up - Rita moved her hands unexpectedly, gently, but with certain strength, holding Diana's back.

"Calm down. It's okay. - Deanna."

"Rita... hey, sama"

"Whatever happens to you, I'm here. I'm on your side no matter what happens."

"Hey sama...."

"If you can't forgive me, I'll forgive you.... even if I'm hopeless enough to stand up, I'll be there for you. That's why it's okay."

... what you were about to endure in Rita's words, as if you had read Diana's mood, is easily overflowing. There were zero drops from both eyes, and Diana snapped one.

"I knew it. I knew it was no good. I knew it."

"Deanna...."

"Because I'm so selfish. I knew when I realized it, I couldn't stand it anymore."

"... what makes you unbearable?

"... do what you want."

As a word, I can't stand at last. When her knees are crushed and she sits down, Rita supports her with exquisite force and lowers herself to the floor without pain.

Diana peeks into Rita's face with her eyes on her.

"Hey, did Rita do the same?... did you think you wanted Al?

Eh...

"The other person's feelings and circumstances. I don't care about all that stuff... just because you want it?

Rita's eyes looked stunned.

Leaving it for a while - she nodded slowly.

"Yeah, that's right... I thought I wanted it."

"Yes, what is it? I knew it....."

"When you fall in love... when you fall in love. I want to spend time with you, I'm happy when I meet you, and when I don't meet you, I miss you a lot."

Affirmed, full of tears. Diana appealed to Rita, shaking her head.

"No, no, no, no."

"Why?"

"I mean, that's not true. I'll tie him up forever."

"Can't you tie it up?

"No, it's settled. It's selfish to make someone yours, to deprive someone of their liberty and tie them up. It's arrogant,"

"... is that so?

"... I knew this feeling could make that person unhappy, so I definitely didn't want to notice it."

"Did you notice that?

"Your Highness said... I can't afford to think about the other person's mind, and I'm drowning both physically and mentally in their existence. I just want one of them to be" in love. "

To be clear, I couldn't do it anymore. Stick to Rita with a bursting emotion and tell her with tears.

"I've always wanted it. I don't remember when. When I realized it, I already wanted Kai."

"Deanna...."

"When only the warmth of Kai became special and I was happy to touch the body temperature... I thought I wanted more, I thought it was no good. Once you know more, you won't be able to leave."

"Can't you just stay away?

"No."

"... why?

"... because Kai is such a sweet person."

……

"If Khai knows this feeling, that affectionate, kind person won't be able to abandon me.... in the future, even if you can do more than you want to do next to me, you may be worried about me, and you may not be able to go the way you want."

"Ahh...."

"If that's the case, it's my job to guess what he wants and push his back... and if I can't leave him, I'll sugar his kindness and take away his freedom. I'll tie Kai up."

... the more you say it, the more scared you get. It's just imaginary, but it's an amazingly realistic future.

Because I am more aware of myself than anyone else. This vicious "love" binds him to the future in sight - despair.

"... I didn't want to know."

"... Deanna"

"I want Kai to live as he wishes and grasp the future of happiness as he wishes. Because you're a loved one - a loved one, so"

"Hmm... that's right."

"And yet... maybe one day Kai will come, and I can't stand the thought of a day when Kai will choose to leave me for his own happiness. I can't believe I'm lonely."

…………

"If you want to be so fierce that you can't hope for the happiness of the person you love the most... I didn't want to know. I wanted to live without knowing for the rest of my life!"

Even the position of "side chamber head" became a safety valve to control this thought and not tie Kai's freedom from the cage that bound him.

One day, I handed over the role of "Red Rose" to Sheila, and I wanted to fulfill the promise I made to Kai to be nothing but "Diana" - I remembered the unspeakable loneliness that it was the "end" with him.

I yearned for a kind love like my parents. I wanted to have a peaceful love like my brother and Chris.

But - to make love gentle and calm, you must have more humans. At Diana, everything is missing.

Rita gently rubs Diana's back in despair.

"Certainly... Deanna is right, there is also a selfish and fierce aspect to love. Otherwise, there would be no such thing as a rubbing matter caused by a craving."

"That's right...."

But...

Here, cut the words unexpectedly. Rita woke up supporting Diana.

"This is just my theory. ― ― If each other's selfishness serves as a miracle match. In particular, isn't there a problem with your thoughts?

"Rita....?

"You can't consider the circumstances of the person you're looking for... but when the person you're looking for is there, it's not alone. You can't tell if Deanna's thoughts are really selfish without asking her.

Speaking to Diana, Rita's gaze is towards Diana's further balcony.

With her head still out of work, Diana followed Rita's gaze and looked back.

――

The moment you acknowledge Kai's appearance standing in a state of indifference, all your thoughts bounce and fly.

With her pure white head, Diana was just stiff.