The Most Random System

Bai Bufan shyly covered his face.

Wang Ze, Chen Tianming, Zhang Haoyang, and others: "..."

Everyone knew Bai Bufan was about to talk about poop, but they didn’t expect it to be such pure poop, with all the nutrients already absorbed by the large intestine, leaving only the purest feces.

Some people were dying to hear this, you know.

Lin Li was okay with it, he thought it made sense.

But according to this logic, he himself seemed to be like a ripped crotch.

No matter how many weeks or even dozens of weeks he was tormented by the playground, it seemed to not matter, he could even enjoy the wind along the way.

"Oh dear, turns out I’m even more filthy."

"Lin Li, can I borrow your soy sauce for a bit, I really want to hit Bai Bufan now."

Qin Zeyu’s mouth said soy sauce, his mouth twitching, and his palm itching to smack someone.

Lin Li casually tossed the bottle of soy sauce and cola to Qin Zeyu, stroking his own chin:

"Hey, now that you mention it, the cafeteria is quite suggestive too—swallow it down, don’t want to eat? If you spit it out, there will be punishment, you know~"

Qin Zeyu: "?"

Zhang Haoyang also stroked his chin: "Now that you guys mention it, solving equations is actually pretty slutty too—playing hard to get behind a bunch of numbers, but really just waiting for me to decipher it. If I don’t want to solve it, it will give me hints and guidance, my pen ink practically floods on it, how tantalizing."

Qin Zeyu: "..."

Wang Ze stroked his chin, but the next second Lin Li smacked it away, and he could only helplessly stroke his own chin:

"Now that you mention it, the classroom is quite suggestive too—it’s a room where you’re not allowed to leave unless you’ve been in there for forty-five minutes."

Qin Zeyu: "OvO"

Yang Bangjie also joined in: "Now that you mention it, the fourth and fifth periods in the morning are even more suspicious—’Even though your unfocused look is cute, now’s not the time to sleep, persist with me.’

Zhou Baowei stroked his double chin, his sleaziness not quite enough, so he didn’t speak, just kept stroking, while thinking about what he’d eat later.

As for Chen Tianming, he was busy buttering up Yao Qiaoqiao, might as well consider him dead.

Qin Zeyu smiled in understanding by now, indeed, the problem wasn’t Bai Bufan, nor was it this world, it was his own mouth!

After a round of such exchanges, they all glanced at each other and nodded—

"My god, this school thing, it’s really too scandalous!"

"Tsk, no wonder our thoughts are all so abnormal! So it’s all a problem stemming from the top, and we’re being led astray! How can we study well with these pests around?"

"Sigh!!! Why is the top so crooked!?"

After some complaints with the boys, Lin Li saw that the girls had finished their 800-meter run, and transformed into Chen Tianming No.2, happily trotted over to hand a new bottle of water to Chen Yu Ying.

Nowadays, Chen Yu Ying was impolite enough not to even say thank you.

Secretly complaining about his girlfriend, Lin Li meanwhile disdainfully glanced at Ding Sihan lying on the ground:

"Really thirsty, huh. Just done running and already using it as an excuse to lie in the school hunk’s arms, you’re squashing him. But considering your violence and weight, he can only endure without a word, Dingzi, tsk tsk."

Ding Sihan: "?"

"Go die!!"

Ding Sihan really wanted to use violence against Lin Li.

Unfortunately, in her current weakened post-800-meter state, she could only endure bullying from Nan Village Lin Li, unable to even kick him.

"Look at your bestie, she could clearly lie in the real school hunk’s arms but refrains." Lin Li pointed at Chen Yu Ying, then at himself.

"Lin Li, have you no shame." Qu Wanqiu couldn’t listen anymore, her expression was that of a senior, on a subway, while looking at their phone.

"How much per pound, if it’s cheap I’ll take it."

"500 grams."

"Too expensive, I’ll name a price, 400 grams per pound."

"Deal!"

"..."

"Use the remaining time as you wish.

This week there’s still a PE class, you can arrange it as you like, if you want to study in the classroom, stay in the classroom, if you want to go out and have free activities, have free activities, if you want to get equipment from the equipment room, I’ll leave the key with Wang Ze ahead of time, get it yourselves, but make sure to return it after class ends, I won’t come back.

As for the PE class next week, just treat it as a study period, and get ready for the final exams.

Alright, you’re dismissed." After recording the long run results according to the rankings just reported, You Jun casually said.

You Jun leisurely left, and the members sitting in Class Four slowly got up, but no one headed to the court.

There were only ten minutes left in this period, even if one wanted to play ball, by the time everyone caught their breath, it would be over.

Some headed straight back to the classroom, others went to the school’s convenience store to buy water.

One spouse to share love with, so Lin Li ditched Chen Yu Ying, and went to the convenience store with Bai Bufan and the others.

The main reason being, once Ding Sihan’s health bar refilled, his pants would be in trouble.

"Everyone has a budget of one and a half bucks, my treat!" said Chen Tianming, who had returned to join the Class Four boys’ group, as he walked with them towards the convenience store.

"Made big progress again?" Lin Li glanced at Chen Tianming, saying amusedly.

"She just called me Tianming and she did it right in front of her friends too!!" Chen Tianming giggled.

Lin Li raised an eyebrow.

From a certain perspective, it was indeed quite a significant progress.

After all, in this current stage, most guys and girls maintained significant reserve, except for those with names like Lin Li or rare warm personalities, generally speaking, whether a guy calling a girl or vice versa, it was usually full name by default.

When relations improved, guys and girls usually used nicknames instead of real names.

Even Lin Li, the girls in class he’s carefree enough to call by name, there were just "three," and more often he used nicknames.

"Well congrats then." Matchmaker Qin Zeyu grit his teeth, deciding to go back and bless the two for a few rounds.

"Thanks, Zeyu, to thank you for blessing me first, I’ve decided your budget will be two bucks!" Chen Tianming chuckled maliciously, patting him on the shoulder, "Maybe you can catch some of my good luck."

Qin Zeyu: "!"

"Damn it! Damn!!"

The others, unlike Qin Zeyu, not hormonally driven, cared more about Chen Tianming’s one and a half—

"One and a half bucks, that’s just enough for a winter melon tea, can’t even buy a small bottle of Coke."

"Actually, Tianming probably means for us to pool money and split a bottle of water between two people."

"Hmm—that works too."

"Tianming, I’ve decided," during the exchange, Bai Bufan turned to Chen Tianming and said, "one and a half, right? I want a winter hand brew!"

Chen Tianming: "?"

Chen Tianming looked around, but didn’t see any students from other classes yet, but doing it in such a public setting wasn’t too good, right?

Sigh, brothers are brothers, let’s indulge him.

Chen Tianming nodded: "Go ahead, we’ll cover for you."

Bai Bufan looked at Chen Tianming with a combination of delight and disdain: "What nonsense are you talking about, I meant I want a popsicle."

Chen Tianming: "..."

Son of a bitch.

That’s indeed a winter hand brew.

Suggest naming a new specialty in a coffee shop, let guests be astonished by the hand brew.

"Eat up, eat up, if only black milk popsicles from deft were available here, I’d shove one in your mouth." Chen Tianming disdainfully shook his head.

"Why dis black milk popsicles, you think it was black milk popsicles that ruined this speech?

Actually, no, the stark contrast between serious truth-telling and abstract black milk popsicles makes this speech unforgettable, truly embedding the logic in the mind.

But, come to think of it, deft had like over ninety, right?"

Qin Zeyu didn’t want to eat charity food, so he was out of sync with the laughing crowd.

He stood forlornly at the convenience store entrance, whispering sadly: "Which girl in the future would be willing to call me Zeyu?"

The store’s cashier owner: "Zeyu?"

Qin Zeyu: "..."

Oh god, not you ma’am.

Even if you like me, I’d add a condition, I want a girl within a five-year age gap.

The owner: "You’re called Zeyu? Is it Qin Zeyu? I have three meal cards here, all picked up by other students recently, see if any of them are yours."

Qin Zeyu: "...Thank you, sister TAT."

Shit.