The Most Random System

Lin Li happily patted Bai Bufan’s shoulder:

"According to unofficial histories, the reason why Black people have strong physical constitutions is because of numerous large-scale movements throughout history. Bufan, you’ve been barking about ’Bufan’s Movement’ all semester, but haven’t really moved much, have you?"

"Start taking action now,"

Lin Li tried to encourage Bai Bufan:

"You must understand, Bufan, although you can’t change the past, you can still mess up the future. Come on! You can do it!"

Bai Bufan, who was all ready to get pumped up: "?"

"You son of a...!! What kind of messed-up motivational speech is this!"

Lin Li: "Oh, my ’chicken’ is the ’chicken’ in ’barely’."

Bai Bufan: "That’s called bathwater."

...

In terms of time, objectively, it won’t slow down just because Bai Bufan fears it.

The afternoon arrived as scheduled.

Because the first period was PE class, right after the lunchtime bell, Lin Li patted the sleeping Chen Yu Ying next to him: "Lunch break is over, time to wake up and go downstairs."

Being a girl who participated in athletics, Chen Yu Ying’s physical education wasn’t top-notch but at least excellent; therefore, she wasn’t nervous about the physical test.

Awake, Chen Yu Ying stretched, swatted away Lin Li’s mischievous finger poking her waist, got up and looked at Lin Li, giving a small yawn: "Mmm mmm~ Got it, let’s go."

Her voice still carried a touch of sleepy confusion and laziness.

It sounded nice.

"Can you call me ’big brother’ with that kind of voice?"

"No way~"

"Darn it."

Lin Li, deciding to find another opportunity next time, went downstairs with Chen Yu Ying to the playground and asked her: "Doesn’t sleeping like that make you uncomfortable?"

"It’s not bad in winter, since the school uniform is thick, it’s quite comfy to lie down on. Besides, I don’t take afternoon naps often." Replied the now fully awake girl with a cheerful tone.

"Not bad means it’s not good, how about this, I have a really nice pillow at home, should I bring it here to keep in case you need it in the classroom?

It’s super useful, last week I used it to put my friend to sleep, and he still hasn’t woken up after three days."

Lin Li said seriously.

This isn’t a matter of waking up, but rather if it smells!

Chen Yu Ying rolled her eyes: "Lin Li, have you considered that maybe your friend is hibernating?"

"Exactly!!" Lin Li nodded excitedly, "I was actually a bit worried at the time because he had been asleep for so long, so I did some research on what conditions can make sleep last for days, then I found hibernation as the answer.

It all checked out immediately, so after consideration, worried that hibernating in normal room temperature might be harmful for my friend, I put him back in the fridge!"

But then, Lin Li looked a bit vexed:

"But later, his family called the police to my house, claiming I was attempting murder.

I explained it, but they wouldn’t believe me. I really don’t get what these people are thinking, treating Lv Dongbin like a dog that bites him for not recognizing a good person, sigh——"

Chen Yu Ying: "..."

Where’s the good person?

Tell me, where’s the good person?

It all matched up, but it matched up with the process of murder, didn’t it?

At the fixed meeting point for Class 4 on the PE field, there were already quite a few people present.

The two of them didn’t linger together any longer, they split up and joined their respective groups.

Lin Li naturally continued his beastly ways, adding pressure to the former comrades-in-arms like Bai Bufan and Zhang Haoyang, who now have pitifully thick shells.

Bai Bufan hadn’t arrived yet, so Lin Li started pestering Zhang Haoyang first.

"Haoyang, do you know why people sweat when they’re nervous?" Lin Li inquired.

"Because there’s a road-side Pikachu named Lin Li nearby," Zhang Haoyang smirked, "It’s afraid of being bitten."

Lin Li chuckled: "It’s because the pressure is so intense that it squeezes the water out from your brain."

Zhang Haoyang: "..."

Well, in some ways, that makes sense.

Unable to hold back a chuckle, Zhang Haoyang waved his hand, signaling Lin Li to bug off: "If you know there’s pressure, then stay away from me, lest I turn into ’Heavy Male’ and want to start a band with you for life."

"I heard ’start a band with you for life’? Really? Can I join?" Wang Ze peeked in.

"Great, now there are two sporty jerks," Zhang Haoyang despaired.

"Haoyang, Wang Ze being a jerk is true, but don’t you see I’m actually helping you?"

Lin Li looked at Zhang Haoyang with disappointment.

Zhang Haoyang sneered at Lin Li, waiting to see what rubbish would come out of his mouth next.

Lin Li OvO: "I saw you sweating, so I thought I’d come over and add some sarcastic remarks to make you feel better."

Zhang Haoyang: "(•́へ•́╬)!!"

"Hey, Brother Lin, look, Bai Bufan is here, also Bao Wei. Go torture them."

Seeing Lin Li about to launch another barrage, Zhang Haoyang quickly decided better them than him.

With Wang Ze already there, Lin Li gave a sly smile and approached the two.

However, halfway there, he noticed Bai Bufan, who raised his hand in a solemn pause signal.

"Hmm—" Bai Bufan took a deep breath and then exhaled, his voice lacking its usual lightheartedness:

"Lin Li, hold on, I’m really not feeling well right now."

"What’s up?" Lin Li tilted his chin.

He didn’t care at all.

Bai Bufan shook his head, frowning at the field, although the winter sun was just right, he still felt uneasy:

"I’m unusually nervous, even more than during previous physical tests. I feel a bit nauseous, like I can’t breathe properly, I sense I’ll throw up when I run the thousand meters later, feeling very uncomfortable."

Lin Li was about to ask if Bai Bufan was just acting to reduce his own torment, but suddenly raised a brow and asked a different question:

"Bufan, did you take a nap this noon?"

"Yeah, I did nap," Bai Bufan nodded, "but what’s that got to do with my discomfort now? I’m not feeling bad because of lack of sleep? I’ve napped before without this issue."

Lin Li: "Because you wore your sweater inside out."

"?"

Bai Bufan looked down, then up, then down again, and finally chuckled with embarrassment: "Haha, what a fuss this is~"

Because he was wearing thermal underclothes underneath the sweater, he didn’t need to go to a place with no people to change. Bai Bufan successfully took it off and put it on correctly after a banana salute exercise.

"Feels much better now, doesn’t it?"

"Slightly better, but not by much, I still feel a bit nauseous and uncomfortable TAT, I’d rather wear a thousand sweaters inside out than take this physical test."

Bai Bufan still had a tense look on his face.

Lin Li thought for a moment, then seriously patted Bai Bufan’s shoulder and earnestly said:

"Bufan, given the situation, I must tell you this."

"We’re actually in a world similar to the Matrix.

Life as we know it is merely a hallucination created after inhaling oxygen. Once you stop breathing in oxygen, the illusion fades. There’s still time, as long as you quit oxygen, the hallucination will disappear, and the pain of the thousand meters will vanish."

"Wait a minute, won’t my ashes scatter with it too?" Bai Bufan deadpanned.

"The teacher’s here, straighten up the rows."

Before they could continue anymore, Wang Ze, tasked with keeping order, clapped his hands and gestured.

Indeed, You Jun was steadily making his way over with the class list in hand, a stopwatch hanging around his neck.

"Today is the physical test, so we aim to complete all events except the thousand and eight hundred. We’ve got to make the best use of time."

Approaching them, You Jun got straight to the point.

"Wahoo—!!" The near-death Bai Bufan beside Lin Li lit up with excitement, instantly transforming into Baili Shouyue:

"Prepare a dinner by the campfire to celebrate surviving another day!!"

—Apart from the thousand meters, other events aren’t much of a problem.

"Wang Ze, you and Xie Wenjing go to the equipment room and bring six mats for sit-ups to the equipment area, while the rest of you, it’s winter, but you still need to do a warm-up, as you’ll be running fifty meters later.

So the others will run one lap around the outermost circle of the field, then head over to the equipment area directly."

You Jun pointed to the area on the field equipped with horizontal and parallel bars, as well as other composite equipment.

The now-revived Bai Bufan immediately raised his hand.

"Speak."

"Teacher, one lap is too long, can we just run six days?"

"Heh."

--

Exhausted from editing and rewriting.

Nansang High School made a reluctant appearance, Lin Li, learning power, First Rank!

Whether genius these fell or not is unknown, but the antenna has definitely fallen.

And it’s not even finished yet, still waiting on further instructions. Chances are, hundreds of Chapters will need revising, life...how fleeting it is...

Sigh, I’m so restless that not venting is physically uncomfortable, damn it.

I hope to keep living well.