─ Hurry up, I want to tell you. I want to tell him what it really feels like not to lie. But...... I've been rejecting him scattered. Do I deserve to tell you how I feel now?
The feeling of "sorry" and "I want to convey this thought quickly" makes my heart mess.
When I opened the hospital room door with that thought, I saw Richt talking to Melvin with a blurred look on his face.
I just woke up and I still don't have a clear consciousness, and the answer seems traceable.
"Richt! Good...... woke up, really good!
"Ceres......?
Looking at me rushing over to bed, Richt was leaning his neck wonderfully.
"I... how could I be here..."
To the bewildered Richter, Melvin explained how.
I lay low that I had three more months to live on the boulder, but Richt seemed to grasp first that his health was not good.
"Um... Doctor. Is it okay if I talk to Richt?
I wanted to tell Richt how I really felt right away, but when I think about it, I realize that he's just regained consciousness, and I hesitate to talk to him about it.
"Forbidden to impose, but there won't be a problem as long as we talk about it for a little while"
"Really... good"
I relaxed when I heard Melvin's words and stroked my chest down, I leaned over by the bed and lowered my hips over it.
And then I gently lay my own hands on Richter's beautiful hands and casually tangled my fingers.
Surprised by the trick, Richter stared at me with a glaring eye. After realizing my true intentions, even if I just held hands, my chest was tightened and I was thrilled.
When you say this is the situation, your heart is like a girl who makes her breasts jump on her first love. It kind of complicates my mood.
"Well, I'll get back to work. If you need anything, push the nurse call and call the nurse. Nice to meet you."
"Yes, leave it to me"
"... don't push yourself too hard either."
"Yes. Thank you for your concern. But now I'm worried about Richter's body... so I'd like to stay with you as long as I can."
Returning it, Melvin left behind the leftover room, saying, "Keep it on track."
Then I exchanged two or three words, but Richt fell asleep soon as he seemed tired.
Again, is the body under considerable strain...... Even with that in mind, I keep holding his hand.
-It's okay. Never... never, ever, ever let you die.
Consolidate your resolve even harder and stare at Richt's sleeping face.
Then another two hours or so went by. When I lost my sleeping appetite and slept naggingly, Richt accidentally slapped me on the shoulder.
"Ceres, are you awake?
"... um... ah... richt? Sorry... if I did, I would..."
"Oh, I knew you were sleepy. Sorry to wake you..."
"Yeah, I'm fine. More than that, what's wrong?
"Um... if you like, why don't you go see the stars?
"Stars...?
Moving his gaze out the window, he saw an amazingly beautiful starry sky.
With that said, a nurse used to tell me that the day the stars come out because this hospital is on a hill is spectacular.
"Huh...? But is your body okay...?
"This street, I don't think I can flutter and walk decently... but with a wheelchair I'll be fine"
"Okay. In the meantime, I'm going to ask if I can go outside."
When I first got permission from the attending physician to borrow a wheelchair for Richter, who was also unbearable to walk, and went outside the hospital, overhead there was a much more beautiful starry sky full of stars than viewed from the room.
Pushing a wheelchair, I breathe less of a roll. Then I looked back at this one like Richt remembered something.
"Even in my previous life, when I was a little girl, this is how we saw the starry sky together... remember?
"In previous life...?
"Oh. Back then you often didn't want to go home saying, 'I don't want to go home because I don't like being slapped by your father'. So, usually I was forced to drag you home, but only once, you wasted so much time, I had no choice but to break it."
"You remember very well. With that said, I wonder if that happened..."
I'll dig up the memories of my previous life. I remember wandering, but I still remember seeing the stars with you, though somehow.
"At that time, the starry sky I saw was so beautiful... I thought I'd invite you on another date in the name of astronomical observation when you grew up. But in the end, I couldn't. The reason is that... somehow, you're embarrassed..."
That being said, Richt shyly put his head on.
Sure, seeing the stars together is like dating a lover, and as far as he's concerned, I guess he couldn't say it's going to be weird.
"But... I'm glad I invited you today. Now, there's nothing left to remember. Maybe I can't see the kid's face..."
"Richt......? What did you say?"
"I know. I guess I haven't been around much longer...?
"I don't..."
"Tell me the truth, Ceres"
"... Huh!
Unexpectedly leaning down and biting his lips, Richt continued the conversation as if he had guessed the circumstances.
"I knew, right... I've always thought my body wasn't feeling right..."
Richt sighs deeply and lays his eyes down lonely.
Truth be told, I had noticed his change in physical condition since the time he began to hide in the town of Reeve.
Now that I think about it, I guess that's why Melvin has been bothering to visit the mansion because of his physical condition.
But at the time, I thought his pale complexion was probably due to work fatigue, so I never dreamed there would be such a situation.
And yet, it's regrettable that I didn't notice.
"You know... Richt. I still can't tell you the details...... me, I'll help. I'll definitely try to help you."
"Thank you, Ceres.... but that's enough. That's all I've done. I'm sure it's a natural reward."
"Oh, no! I don't need Richter! 'Cause I... about Richt...!
"Ceres......?
A large grain of tears falls on Richter's shoulder when it is flabby. You confused me like that, Richt manipulated his own wheelchair and turned to this one.
"I like... I like Richt...! I love you......! So don't die! Don't leave me alone......! Don't leave me...!
When I held him to Richter's chest with a blur and tears, he looked at me with his eyes round as if he had been taken aback.
"I gradually realized how I really felt! The truth is, I've always liked you......! But that's weird... 'It's unusual that I like my brother. It's disgusting' around me... I was so worried, I put a lid on my heart... I thought I'd given up on you! So, 'I grew up because I could like other boys properly. It's just a little bit of a bracon,' I thought... at the end of the sentence, I used you! If I had to go out with you, I would be able to leave my brother more - believe me, be him and his lover each other... and as a result, I hurt two dear ones...! It's all my fault! If I hadn't lied to my own heart, this wouldn't have happened......!
"Ceres......"
"It's not just the two of us! Because of me... my father, my mother, my uncle... we've all become unhappy!
"... Huh!... Enough, Ceres. That's enough... you, don't blame yourself anymore. Like I said, I'm the worst..."
Richt gently stroked my head as he held it against his chest, even with a sinking expression.
"Richt is not bad! I'm the cause, I'm the fault! I'm the worst person to be unhappy around! But hey...... even I like you and I can't help but scratch your feet to keep you from dying that I love you! I want my loved ones to get their smiles back and I'm desperately scratching my feet...!
When I told him the obvious thought, I put my hand on Richt's cheek and dropped my mouth just to gently touch his lips.
After finishing his mouth a little longer and slowly leaving Richt, he had his eyes wide open wondering if he was surprised by the unintentional kiss.
I turn to him like that and try to make every smile I can.
"... so let me do my best. Now it's my (...) number (...)."
I was just hiding behind my brother, it was a moment of complete separation from the 'cowardly, crying self'.
I'm not running anymore. I accept myself, who was a coward and a crybaby, who loved my brother but couldn't admit it, the mistakes I made, the fact that people around me became unhappy because of me - all of it, as part of me.
Because... without that past, I'm sure I wouldn't have been strong.
Because I wouldn't have had the courage to protect my loved ones.
"... thanks, Ceres. I can't believe I got my thoughts right with the person I thought I'd never be tied to... I'm a happy person."
Richt, who gave it back, laughed with his eyes narrowed when he said, "Even if my life doesn't help me, I'm satisfied."