I can't seem to concentrate today.
Just a few minutes after I started meditating. That's what Irmis called me, and I opened my eyes to Almark's calf.
"How hard is it to study for exams?"
Irmis doesn't scold Almark, he asks.
"Yes, for the first time in my life..."
Almark replied. Ill snort, hmm.
"That doesn't seem like the only reason I can't concentrate."
Almark swung at the seemingly clear words of Illmis. That's Dr. Illmis. Almark thinks he can't hide anything from this teacher.
"The teacher is expected to do anything. Actually..."
Almark honestly told Ilmiss about Wendy. That Wendy sees my studies every day, but there's nothing I can give her back for that kindness of hers. But I want to do something for you, and my chest hurts when I think about it.
Irmis initially raised his eyebrows a little unexpectedly, but later listened in silence.
When I'm done listening, Hmm, I roar and breathe.
"That kind of story is out of my specialty...... I see. Sure, I forgot because you always act calm like an adult, but you were only an 11-year-old boy."
"... Yes"
"In short, you must like Wendy."
"... do you like..."
Almark looks up anxiously at Illmis.
"Doctor, I don't know, like or dislike... you know, because I've never been in a world like that before"
"If you don't understand, you just need to know now"
That's the same thing with magic or whatever, Illmis continues.
"It's about staring at the identity of that feeling in yourself, without fear. That's one of those dialogues with yourself. And it's also as important as meditation"
Ilmiss said you'd get painful in the chest, keep calm. [M]
"Take care of that feeling. Remember that emotion well now. Because knowing how it feels when you're going to live as a magician will mean a lot."
"... yes, what is it"
I'm not sure about Almark.
"You don't need to know yet. And don't forget..."
Ilmis continued with his index finger up.
"It's how Wendy feels. You say you're bothering Wendy, but she herself wouldn't consider it annoying, etc. Don't forget that Wendy wants to do that to you herself."
"Wendy wanted to do that herself..."
"You'd be happy to help Wendy if she could help you when she was in trouble, wouldn't you?
"Yes, of course it is"
"Do you think Wendy bothered you?
"No, I don't think so"
"Why don't you think Wendy feels the same way right now?
……
Almark relaxed and thought about it. Look at that, Illmis laughs bitterly.
"As I said earlier, this kind of consultation is out of my expertise. I think you're talking about something that doesn't suit you. Come on, let's get this story over with. A good magician can dissociate negative emotions when using magic, no matter what his mental state is."
"Yes."
Encouraged by Irmis, Almark stopped thinking for a moment and immersed himself in meditation.