"What do you mean... you're not human?"
It must have been an unexpected word.
Until then, Luchel blinked as if the sword were a lie.
After momentum, Aldis regretted slipping his mouth for a moment, but he washed it all away just to say it didn't matter anymore.
That was before we met in that building.
When I woke up, there were many boys in the same shape as me.
The fact that the numbers were engraved on the boys' foreheads as they were.
Having no ego, including myself.
I am accustomed to being hurt many times in my vague memories, to being hurt as I was told, to dying many times in pain, and to killing - without any doubt, on the contrary, to being kept in such a situation with my thoughts even receded.
Regenerating self with a flap of applause, and taking in other boys to become who they are now.
It's the first time I've told anyone about Aldis before he became Aldis, something I didn't tell Grace and the others.
"That's... that's..."
I don't believe it, it's Rochelle who shakes her head small, but I still can't deny it strongly because she has a verse that comes to mind.
When she first found Luchel, she was tied to her bunk with a leather belt.
It is natural to think that there was some kind of interaction with the men in the building, as can be seen from the appearance of being frightened by Ardis wearing a white coat and the words "I heard what I said".
Fortunately, she still has memories of being brought to the building.
In front of Grace, he pretended not to know his name as well as Aldis, but perhaps everyone on the scene knew it was a lie.
Luchel, who managed to get out of the place before he was gone, and Ardis, who had lost sight of himself as a human being.
In the same situation, there was a large gap between the two.
"Unlike Luchel, I don't have a family that splits blood without memories of the past.Of course, I'm not human. "
Luchel shows a silly expression, but Aldis ignores it.
"Does Luchel have a place to go?If there is a place to go back, if there are people waiting for you to return, you should go back there.To do that, you must think about surviving no matter what.A human being who has his place - a human being who has a daily life to return to - is worth living for.... but I have nothing.It's a useless human imitation.Nobody will be in trouble if they don't disappear.Then I know which should be our priority. "
That's why Ardis reached out to Luchel.
At first, it was only a rare occurrence, which meant that it was born for the imitation of the created object.
The spirit of Ardis, which had been floating in space since he knew who he was, managed to maintain a dangerous balance in the name of protecting Luchel.
Take Luchel to safety before the balance tilts and becomes irrecoverable, break up, or protect her and face meaningful death.
Aldis decided that one of them was his path, but Luchel denied it straight away.
"That's not true!"
With an unprecedented strong tone, Luchel shouted, now lying down and whispering in disgrace.
"Don't say that...."
He clouds his face as if he had been hurt, holding his fists with his hands lowered.
"Aldis is human.It's not a imitation.Because Ardis took me out of that place, didn't he?You pulled me with that hand, didn't you?You gave me food until I cut my own food, didn't you?You warmed me up all night when I was trembling. "
Luchel turned to Aldis.
The black eyes were wandering in the light.
"Why aren't you human?You can think of someone because you're human, right?If Aldis was really a fake, I wouldn't be able to do that.But if Aldis isn't human, what is human?I don't know, I.... "
She closed her lips tightly while her eyes turned red and pressed and stopped feelings that seemed overflowing with tears.
"... no... human. I... I wouldn't be here without Ardis.Because of Aldis... I'm here.Aldis was the only one who reached out to me in that place.I can't thank you enough for saving my life!So don't say such sad things.Don't say bad things about yourself! "
Luchel stares at Aldis.
Tears spilled from the weir.
But the cause is not simple grief.
"Don't despise my benefactor, even if it's Ardis himself!"
Luchel's eyes are filled with a little sadness and anger.
She is angry.
To Ardis who despises himself.
To Ardis, who despises someone important to her.
Without wanting to take the emotion head-on, Ardis tries to escape.
But I couldn't.
Because it seemed more sinful to pass on Luchel's wrath than to throw one's life away.
Ardis, who was confused, opened his mouth to a situation where he didn't know that he could be angry for himself.
"... I'm sorry."
The words that were finally squeezed out of his mouth were words that he was willing to beg for forgiveness.
Luchel's expression eased.
The fist he was holding loosened, and his hands now wrapped Ardis's hands.
Her tremors came into Ardis's hands.
"If anyone else says anything, it doesn't matter.I think Ardis is a man.Only I can be confident that Ardis is human.Don't forget that, Ardis.At least I'll be sad when you die.So, Aldis, stop treating yourself badly.I won't forgive you for that.Anyway, if you say something like that about yourself or yourself, I'll snap your cheeks relentlessly. "
Luchel, who was still a little angry, stuck a nail in Aldis.
Looking at his face, Ardis felt like he had his feet on the ground for the first time.
The lack of location and vague anxiety that I have felt since I regained my ego and recognized myself today.
No matter how many questions you ask, there is no answer to the question of who you are.
They melt slowly like snow illuminated by sunlight.
"... okay, I won't pretend to treat myself like I'm underground anymore"
"I promise."
"Oh, I promise."
"Yeah."
Comfortable silence fills Aldis.
The sun shining from the sky, and the sound of the creek that goes through the bottom of silence with the spiral, have not changed much from before.
Only Aldis and Luchel are here.
But for Aldis, it felt like a completely different world.
It was Luchel who told the end of the silence.
"Ah, yes."
Explore pockets as you recall and remove a wide range of cloth from them.
"I made this.I'm not very good at sewing, and I didn't get a good fabric, so I might not look good. "
The cloth that Rouchelle gave Aldis was a little bigger than the palm of his hand, stained with a millet.
The Ardis in his hand notices that it is ringed.
"If you're worried about seeing your forehead, why don't you hide it?"
The creator, Luchel, tells him it's a headband wrapped around his head.
He knew Aldis had been worried about the numbers on his forehead for a long time.
Sometimes it looks like a clap, even though it's usually hidden by the front of your hair.
Luchel was aware that Aldis's movements were slowing down every time.
"Look, it's all mine."
Looking sideways, Luchel showed her back hair.
Long black hair was brought together slightly behind the pine.
Tie your hair with a slightly thicker ribbon.
The colour was the same as the headband Aldis received.
While looking alternately at the headband in his hand and Luchel's ribbon, Aldis felt warm in the back of his chest.
I think it is necessary and important.
It just seemed like there was something in the life of the crop that wasn't worth it.
"This is how I look.I'm sorry for being so ungrateful, but I'm still going to pay you back.Be prepared. "
Ardis' cheeks naturally loosen to Rouchelle, who smiles hard.
"Thank you."
Responding with gratitude to the challenging words, Aldis wears headbands.
The number on the forehead was completely hidden in a wide fabric.
That's all.
With just that, Aldis' chest is filled with satisfaction that she has never felt before.
I felt that the smile-coloured headband without any eccentricity not only engraved on the forehead, but also wrapped the pain and loneliness that lurked deep in my heart.