Chapter 133: Guilt
Kieran sat alone in his laboratory office, surrounded by the quiet hum of machines and the sterile scent of antiseptic that seemed to cling to every corner of the Central Hospital’s research wing.
Unlike the main hospital, where footsteps and voices constantly filled the corridors, this section was almost unnaturally quiet. The thick glass walls of his office overlooked the larger laboratory, where several pieces of sophisticated equipment sat beneath bright overhead lights.
Refrigerated storage units hummed softly along one wall, while shelves held rows of carefully labelled vials, test tubes and sealed containers.
His own office was far less clinical. A large desk dominated the centre of the room, its dark surface almost completely hidden beneath research papers, medical journals and neatly arranged files.
Several monitors were positioned across the desk, one displaying a series of complex graphs from the latest drug trial. Another showed a detailed analysis of the molecular structure of the experimental compound he had been working on for months.
Kieran had always been a medical doctor first, with years of surgical experience behind him, but his abilities had eventually pushed his research into territory no ordinary physician could explore.
His advanced healing magic had given him a unique understanding of how healing worked at a cellular level, and he had become obsessed with discovering ways magic could be infused into medicine. They weren’t medical potions but something else.
Kieran’s gaze remained fixed on the screen as his fingers moved steadily across the keyboard. He was finishing the report for his latest drug trial, carefully documenting the results and recording every detail that might be relevant to future testing. The trial had been successful. That should have been enough to make him feel satisfied. Instead, Kieran felt exhausted.
Something warm touched the back of his hand. His fingers stopped. Kieran slowly lowered his gaze. A single drop of blood had fallen onto his pale skin. He stared at it for a moment before releasing a quiet sigh.
Without any visible concern, he reached for a box of medical wipes sitting beside his keyboard and pulled one free. He wiped the blood away, folded the stained wipe neatly and tossed it into the bin. Another drop escaped from his nose. Kieran closed his eyes.
’Take a break, Kieran.’ His wolf’s voice carried none of his usual patience. ’Our body is falling apart. You haven’t rested properly since the rejection.’
Kieran picked up another wipe and pressed it beneath his nose. ’I can’t stop now. I’m almost finished with the report,’ he replied.
’You said that six hours ago,’ his wolf argued. Kieran ignored him. His fingers returned to the keyboard.
’The trial was successful. I need to finish documenting the results.’
His wolf gave a long, deeply irritated sigh. ’Did you forget that you absorbed three times the backlash?’
Kieran’s fingers froze above the keyboard. For a moment, the laboratory seemed quieter than before. He hadn’t forgotten.
How could he? The memory had been haunting him since the rejection. The instant Yuki’s bond with Killian had begun to snap, Kieran had felt the backlash tearing through her.
He had reacted without thinking. His abilities had reached through the bond and pulled the pain towards himself. He had assumed it would be manageable.
After all, Kieran’s body possessed an extraordinary regenerative ability. He had survived injuries that would have killed ordinary werewolves.
His magic allowed his body to repair itself at a speed that bordered on unnatural, even for shifters. But he had underestimated the strength of the bond. What had happened between them shouldn’t have been possible.
The backlash from Killian’s rejection had struck Yuki first. Then Kieran had taken his own rejection’s backlash as well as the remaining damage meant for Yuki. Three separate waves of backlash had torn through him, each one layered over the last. His regenerative body had survived it, but only barely.
Kieran leaned back in his chair, his expression remaining impassive as he stared at the screen. Kaden had already proved that strength could be transferred through a bond during that combat class with Eloise. Kieran had simply discovered that the transfer could work in reverse. If strength could be taken, perhaps pain could be taken too.
Kieran’s jaw tightened. He hadn’t been testing anything. He had simply acted. The moment he had realised Yuki couldn’t survive the full backlash, he had drawn it into himself. That was all. He thought he could handle it. After all, he had a very good regenerative body, but he had clearly underestimated the bond’s strength. It didn’t make sense for the bond to be that strong.
’Maybe it is because of the curse,’ his wolf added thoughtfully.
Kieran’s gaze shifted towards the darkened window overlooking the laboratory. The curse. That explanation made a certain amount of sense.
They were the first Ravencourt triplets in generations to reject an unclaimed mate. Perhaps the curse had twisted the bond into something far more powerful than either of them understood. Perhaps that was why the rejection had been so devastating.
Kieran lifted the wipe to his nose again when he felt another warm trickle. He cleaned it away, staring at the faint red stain on the white material. His body was weak. He knew that. But he wasn’t worried about himself.
His regenerative abilities would eventually repair the damage. It might take weeks or even months, but he would recover. What bothered him was something else. Yuki.
Kieran’s gaze lowered. If his body, with all its regenerative abilities, had suffered this much damage, what would have happened to Yuki if he hadn’t intervened? She had already been in a critical state before Kaden’s rejection.
She had only survived because Kieran had absorbed the backlash from both himself and Killian. And even then, she had fallen into a coma. What would have happened if she had received everything? Kieran’s fingers curled against the edge of his desk.
He didn’t care about Yuki. He had spent days telling himself that Yuki’s condition was none of his concern. Yet every time he closed his eyes, his mind returned to the same question. What if he hadn’t taken the backlash?
He still hated her. He still remembered why she had become the one person he had never wanted to see again.
But there was a difference between hating someone and wanting them dead. Kieran couldn’t accept the thought of someone dying because of his actions. That wasn’t who he was. His eyes returned to the screen. He finished typing the final sentence and pressed the save button.
"Done," he murmured.
Kieran glanced at the heading.
**Regenerative Treatment for Comatose Patients.**
His wolf remained suspiciously quiet. Kieran stared at the title.
His wolf’s response came immediately. ’Finally. Get the drugs ready so you can treat yourself.’
Kieran’s brow twitched. ’I’m fine,’ he retorted.
’You’re bleeding from your nose,’ his wolf sneered at him.
’It isn’t serious.’
’You haven’t slept properly in weeks.’
’I sleep.’
’Four hours is not sleep.’
Kieran’s lips pressed into a thin line. His wolf continued mercilessly.
’You can’t keep relying on your healing abilities. They aren’t infinite.’