The Wolf God's Unwanted Luna

Vivian’s POV

I didn’t even realize how wildly uneven my breathing had become until my chest gave a painful, desperate thud in protest. I twisted the shower dial, letting cold water rush over me while turning the hot tap all the way down. It didn’t help. My forehead pressed against the wet tiled wall, the cold droplets sliding over my skin like tiny burning needles, doing absolutely nothing to cool the inferno blazing beneath my flesh.

I could breathe, technically, but it didn’t feel like nearly enough oxygen. Each inhale felt shallow and strained, as if my lungs were fighting just to function. My limbs trembled violently under me, feeling both impossibly heavy and far too weak at once, while a slow, pulsing ache began to grow behind my eyes. Dull at first, but steadily gaining strength like something trying to claw its way out of my skull.

Heat licked under my skin. Not the warmth of the shower, but something deeper, alive, and thoroughly unnatural. I could feel sweat slicking my back, even with the freezing water pelting me. Panic began to scratch viciously at my insides.

This wasn’t normal. None of it was.

I forced myself upright, dizzy and completely disoriented. The shower had done nothing but make it infinitely worse. I reached for the dial to turn it off, only for a sudden, sharp agony to slam into my spine with such force that I stumbled backward, nearly slipping on the wet floor. I cried out loudly, catching myself on the metal railing just in time.

Pain. Radiating, searing, spreading through every fiber of my being.

Every single nerve ending in my body lit up at once. My back, my chest, even my gums. My vision swam, my eyes struggling to stay focused as intense pressure bloomed behind them. My legs trembled as I fumbled blindly for a towel, barely managing to wrap it around myself before dragging my trembling body toward the sink. I leaned heavily on the cool marble counter, bracing myself with shaking arms.

The mirror was thick with fog from the steam, but I wiped it away with a trembling hand and froze dead in my tracks.

Claws. My claws were out shifting erratically, lengthening and retracting with zero control. My fingertips throbbed with each heavy pulse of pain.

Something was wrong. So very wrong.

My reflection barely looked human anymore. My wet hair clung to my pale skin like dark ink, my face gaunt and drawn. My eyes were wide, filled with a feverish sheen. My pupils were far too large, swallowing the natural color of my irises, but what little brown remained flickered wildly between light and dark, like it couldn’t decide who or what I was.

And my gums gods, they were bright red and aching, raw like they’d been torn apart from the inside. I lifted a clawed hand to touch them but stopped, terrified I’d slice my own skin open without meaning to.

What is happening to me?

Then the pain in my back returned sharp, pinpointed, like someone was driving massive talons straight into me from the inside out. I gasped and staggered backward, my legs giving out completely. I collapsed hard to the floor, cold tiles pressing against my overheated skin as my body twisted and trembled in sheer agony.

My wolf whimpered deep inside me, terrified and utterly confused. I felt like I was unraveling, coming apart cell by cell. No control. No understanding. Just absolute chaos ripping through every inch of me.

I couldn’t breathe.

Couldn’t think.

Couldn’t fight it.

Zaliver. I need Zaliver.

I clawed my way out of the bathroom, dragging myself slowly across the floorboards. The towel slipped away, my pride completely forgotten. I made it to the edge of the bed before my remaining strength gave out entirely. I collapsed there, half on the floor, half on the rug, my chest heaving as darkness closed in around the edges of my vision.

My heart thundered like a war drum, beating so fast I thought it might burst right through my ribs. The sharp scent of blood filled my nose my own blood. I had clenched my fists so tight that my wild claws had punctured my palms, slicing open skin and drawing crimson. Still, I didn’t care. I was far beyond pain. Or maybe just drowning in it.

And then

The door slammed open with a deafening bang.

Zaliver stormed into the room, wild-eyed and frantic, like he’d felt every single surge of agony I was going through via our mate bond. His gaze found me instantly, and he dropped to his knees beside me without hesitation. His hands hovered over my shaking body, desperately unsure where to touch without causing me more pain. I looked up at him, tears slipping freely from my eyes, my throat raw.

"It hurts," I whispered, the words barely audible. But I knew he heard every syllable.

Because the agony in my body wasn’t just mine anymore. He was feeling it too.

Zaliver looked down at me, his striking face contorted in sheer anguish, his eyes scanning my broken form as if trying to memorize every bruise, every fracture. The pain in his expression mirrored the inferno burning through me. After a agonizing moment, he cursed harshly under his breath and gently lifted me into his arms.

A sharp scream tore from my throat as my body protested the sudden movement, pain spiking everywhere at once.

"I’m so sorry. You’re going to be okay. I’ve got you. You’re safe now. I promise," he whispered again and again, his voice carrying a tone unlike anything I’d ever heard from him. There was fear in it raw, desperate fear and that terrified me far more than the physical pain did.

I couldn’t keep my eyes open. I let them fall shut and buried my face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the deeply familiar, grounding scent of pine, earth, and something uniquely him. He moved swiftly, yet with extreme care, each rapid step sending jolts of pain through me. Still, I found profound comfort in his presence the heat of his skin, the way his warm lips brushed my forehead, the soft murmurs he let slip between tender kisses.

His scent wrapped around me like a heavy blanket, easing my panic little by little. I felt the rush of cool wind against my skin, fast and fresh, and then his steps slowed down. I cracked my eyes open just a sliver. We were out in the forest, surrounded by towering ancient trees and tangled vines. Sunlight broke through the canopy in golden patches, illuminating the path he walked. Somewhere nearby, I heard the steady, powerful rush of water.

I wanted to turn my head to see the source, but even the thought triggered a sharp wave of pain in my chest that made me cry out softly.

Zaliver’s pace quickened immediately.

The air turned significantly colder. Then my toes touched water. My towel clung heavily to my skin as he stepped deeper into the flowing stream. My breath hitched when I realized he was carrying me directly into the current. Over his broad shoulder, I glimpsed a towering waterfall in the distance, its heavy spray misting the air.

The biting cold seeped into me fast, numbing my skin. For a brief moment, I thought the pain might finally fade, but it clung to me even as the chill dulled its sharp edges. I kept my arms wrapped tightly around Zaliver’s bare chest as he moved deeper, the river rising to his ribs and splashing against my side.

"Vivian, I need you to shift," he said, raw panic threading clearly through his deep voice.

I tried to respond, but the only sound I could manage was a weak, pathetic groan. My thoughts were completely scattered, my mind fogged with blinding pain and pure exhaustion. I just wanted to let go. Sleep. Drift away.

"Hey! No don’t fade on me. Stay with me. Please, baby," he begged, shaking me gently in his arms. "Shift for me. I know you’re tired, but you’ll feel better. I promise."

I tilted my head back slightly to meet his eyes. There was something so raw and desperate in his gaze something that shattered the cold fear trying to pull me under.

"Okay," I breathed, though I wasn’t sure if I physically could.

I closed my eyes and reached deep inward, searching for my wolf... but she wasn’t responding. I felt her, curled up tight in a dark corner of my mind, trembling violently. Her paws were clamped over her ears, desperately blocking something out. I called to her, pleaded with her, but she refused to answer me.

"I can’t," I whispered, my voice trembling with utter hopelessness.

Zaliver’s arms tightened protectively around me. "Yes, you can. Please, Vivian. Try again. My little cloud, I know you can do this."

His words cut straight through the heavy haze, gentler this time. I forced my eyes shut again, and instead of calling out to my terrified wolf, I focused entirely on him the soothing warmth of his skin against mine, the steady, rhythmic beat of his heart, the grounding comfort of his voice.

Even standing in the freezing river, Zaliver radiated intense heat. I clung to that warmth like it was the only anchor keeping me tied to this world.

And then... something deep inside me began to stir.