Chapter 34: What am I?
AYLA
I am in a great hall.
The ceiling arches high above me, ribbed with dark stone and painted with constellations I do not recognize. Torches flicker in iron sconces, casting long shadows that dance across the faces of the crowd gathered before me.
There are so many of them. Hundreds and thousands, packed shoulder to shoulder, their eyes fixed on me.
I am sitting on a throne.
The seat beneath me is cold and armrests shaped like wolves’ heads dig into my palms and I can feel the weight of a crown on my head.
My hands are not my hands.
They are older. The knuckles scarred and the fingers calloused from years of sword work but the shape is familiar.
These hands are mine and they are not.
A man steps forward from the crowd. He is old, his beard streaked with gray. He bows low, his voice carrying through the hall.
"My Queen, the border fights grow worse by the day. The rogue Alpha, Varek, has taken three more villages. His forces are moving south, toward the capital."
I hear myself speak, but the voice that leaves my throat is deeper than my own,
"How many men do we have?"
"Eight thousand, my Queen. Perhaps nine, if we call in the northern garrisons."
"That is not enough."
"There is another way, Your Majesty."
I already know what he is going to say. I have heard this argument a hundred times in the past week.
"The Omega queen of the sacredwolf pack has offered her sons and their armies in exchange for a marriage alliance."
I grip the armrests of my throne until my knuckles turn white.
"I will not marry them. Tell Lyriana that will not be possible"
The old man’s eyes plead with me. "Your Majesty, they have fifty thousand warriors. With their forces combined with ours, Varek would not stand a chance. The war would be over within a month."
"I will not marry them." My voice is harder now.
"Please, my Queen. Think of your people. Think of the children dying in the border villages while we sit here debating honor. This is all it would take to save thousands of lives."
"I have a mate. Besides Lyriana does this to mock me. She knows as Omega queen I cannot be seen mating with Alpha princes. They are lowly whether or not they belong to her."
"Your Majesty..."
"We will find another way."
"There is no other way."
I close my eyes and when I open them again, the scene has changed.
I am standing in a garden and three men stand before me.
The Alpha princes. I know them without being told.
"So this is the great Queen my mother told us about." One of them speaks, his tone dripping with mockery.
I lift my chin and stare at him.
"You will keep silent before me."
I channeled my powers into my command watching as they sputtered with shock and bowed their head low.
I step forward.
"I will not marry you. Any of you. I have a mate. I only summoned you all here today so you can get a message to Lyriana. Tell her that this war does not just concern my people and if she thinks she is free from it then she has another thing coming for her."
"Varek will not come for us." The dark haired prince who had spoken before says. "We have an understanding with him."
"An understanding?" I scoff. "Your mother makes a deal with the enemy? I should have known. She has always been that way ever since we were kids."
I turn away from them with one last command.
"Leave my pack and never return."
"You are brave, Omega queen" he says quietly. "But bravery will not save you."
With that they all disappear into the night, leaving me standing alone in the garden.
The scene shifts again and now I am in a small room.
It is warm here, lit by a single candle on a wooden table. The walls are bare stone, the floor covered with woven rushes.
A man stands by the window. He turns when I enter, and my heart clenches in my chest.
He is beautiful. He is my mate.
He crosses to me and takes my face in his hands.
"You look tired," he murmurs.
"I am tired."
"Rough day?"
I nod.
He kisses my forehead then my nose and then my lips.
I melt into him, my arms winding around his neck, my fingers threading into his hair. His mouth moves against mine slowly, tenderly.
"I love you," he whispers against my lips.
"I love you too."
His hands slide down my back, pulling me closer. I can feel his heartbeat as I press myself into him, trying to memorize the shape of him, the smell of him, the warmth of him.
And then I feel pain.
It hits me like a blade between the ribs. I gasp, my hands flying to my chest.
Something is wrong. Something is tearing inside me, ripping through my chest like claws through flesh.
"What is wrong?" my mate asks.
I cannot breathe.
The air will not enter my lungs. My vision blurs as I clutch at his shirt, my knees buckling.
"Stay with me, my love"
But I cannot.
The darkness is closing in. I hear his voice, distant now, calling my name, but it is fading...
I bolted upright.
The scream tore from my throat before I could stop it. My lungs burned as I tried to fill them with air until I was sure I could breathe again.
I looked around the room. My room in the princes’ quarters.
I am safe...I am not her.
But I could still feel the crown on my head, the feel of his lips on mine and the searing agony that had rippled through me.
I scrambled out of bed and cross to the mirror, my legs unsteady.
The girl staring back at me was drenched in sweat, her hair plastered to her temples and her eyes.
My eyes were glowing like twin stars.
What was happening to me? What am I?
Alistair, I thought.
He mentioned he had something to tell me about myself.
I had to find him!