What Should I Do If I was Forced to Marry the Elf Queen

"How can I take it when there are no women? So I finally thought of a way to take advantage of it... I paid a lot of money for the jailer to take the prostitute out of my cell, take off my clothes, and make me full Eyes."

"But such a good thing...it doesn't happen often...so I learned to paint in prison...to record the graceful postures of those women...sometimes I feel bad. , I will also write something like a novel to vent my fantasy."

"That is to say, in the twelve years facing the bars...I invented so many'postures' that no one had ever tried before, and had so many ideas...I am looking forward to it. On the day of my release... I can practice to vent my fantasies in prison."

"Finally... I waited for this day!"

"Twenty-one years ago on July 14th...your father Linden Wan led the revolutionary army to capture the Bastille!"

138. Sexual prosperous to disaster, cut to permanent governance

"At that time... watching the revolutionary army with red and black flags rushing into the Bastille like a tide... I am very happy and excited! Because I was finally liberated... and finally I have practiced my fantasy of the past twelve years in women!"

Friegan said blushingly.

"So, I am very grateful to your father... because if it weren't for him, I would probably have to go to jail for another ten years before being released. So as a thank you... The manuscripts and paintings are regarded as rewards, all dedicated to the great liberator Linden Wan!"

"Actually, when I took out those manuscripts...I was ready to be scolded...After all, this genius-like idea was surrendered by the heavenly Father, which is not understandable by ordinary people. .... Of course, the great liberator in my heart is a completely different person...because I believe that the hero who can break the shackles and liberate the personality of the serf must also understand my idea of ​​physical liberation! "

Having said this, Friegan's breathing became heavy again, and his voice slightly changed because of his excitement.

"What happened later did not come as I expected...Linden Wan the Liberator was indeed not a mortal! After reading my manuscript...His expression seemed a little strange...but it was still forgiving. Interested in discussing with me a lot about the "posture" and "posture" of the body... and even named my surname "Thad", and named the idea of ​​whipping and sadism as "sm"! This is What a genius! What an avant-garde idea!"

Archbishop Friegan said dancing and dancing.

"Of course... In the last great liberator also advised me... He warned me that excessive indulgence might bring disaster to me... At that time he also read two poems for me. I said it was an old saying from the East. So after that, I kept hanging this aphorism from the East in the attic to remind myself..."

After speaking, Friegan's face showed an extremely sacred expression, and said in a serious tone:

"The fishy save paper, cut a hemorrhoid!"

This...what is this?

I was a little confused when I heard this sentence that seemed to be inaccurate in a different world language. I didn't know what the thief was saying.

But what is certain is.... This is definitely the old bastard’s native dialect.

As if he had noticed the puzzled expression on my face, Friegan said very understandingly:

"I've been hanging in the study room. Let me show you."

After speaking, he stretched out his hand to swing a certain mechanism on the wall.

Immediately afterwards, a beautifully framed oriental calligraphy and painting slowly descended from the ceiling of the study.

I saw...On the pure white picture frame, two rows of vigorous and powerful characters suddenly appeared on it:

"Sex is prosperous to disaster, cut to permanent governance!"

This.... What are these?

After paying attention to the meaning of those words, I was almost instantly softened by thunder... and immediately after that, there was an urge to laugh wildly.

Hahahahahahahaha.....This old thing is really bad, bullying others for not understanding the language of another world, right?To give such a thing to an adulterous thief... even regarded as his motto!

Clam clam clam clam clam clam clam clam clam clam...

Holding back the smile, I said as calmly as possible:

"By the way... Archbishop Friegan, do you know what this means?"

"Of course I know, Linden Wan told me."

Archbishop Flegen nodded solemnly:

"It's the meaning of'abstinence before marriage, abstinence after marriage, ferry and reboot'!"

puff--

Is this old emotional bastard fooling him?

I was talking about the slogan of rebooting teaching. Why does the style of painting seem so surprising? It turned out to be a slogan from the old bastard's homeland, "Heavenly Dynasty"!No wonder it is so unique...

Thinking of this, I couldn't help but sympathize with the lewd stick in front of me.

It's so pitiful to be fooled for so many years...

In retrospect, the old bastard also told me about his attack on the Bastille before.

According to him... he decided to attack the Bastille after hearing the bewilderment of the head of the underground party in Gaul.

Because according to the person in charge...The tall Bastille is a symbol of the authoritarian power of the Gaul Kingdom.The horrible prison was full of political prisoners who were thrown into prison for opposing the king... They were tortured, humiliated and tortured all day in the prison.Even... the half-brother of the former king was put on an iron mask and thrown into the Bastille...

All in all, in the description of the leaders of the Gallic Revolutionary Army, the Bastille is a ghastly hell full of torture, killing and blood.

After having this impression, the old bastard immediately mobilized the masses of the royal capital of Gaul, surrounded the Bastille under the leadership of the revolutionary army, and finally broke this notorious prison in Gaul.

But... the results after the battle made the old bastard feel completely disappointed...

Because in that labyrinth-like prison, the revolutionary army neither found the legendary political prisoners tortured, nor the appalling instruments of torture in the rumors...not to mention the iron face in the urban legend. People.

In fact... there were only seven prisoners in the Bastille at the time.

And among these seven prisoners... there are five mental patients who were sent to jail because their family members could not be disciplined, one was a drunkard who fought with people on the street...the other was because The erotic nobleman who was sent to prison for misconduct...

Now it seems... This "sexist" is probably talking about the current Bishop Fleagan...

Remember what the old bastard said:

"At that time... I heard that the Bastille prison was full of the wives and daughters of the loyal ministers and generals, thinking that many young and beautiful ladies would be grateful to Laozi...this was the only way to send troops. .... I know that there is only a pervert in the broken house... and he gave me a large pile of small yellow texts and erotic pictures... said it was a reward for me! But Lao Tzu Depressed to death!"

After that, the old bastard stomped his feet in dismay:

"After that...there were seven prisoners in the prison...Five spirits and an alcoholic, I can't let them go...only this pervert was his mother who was approved by the King of Gaul to approve his arrest. Yes! In order to give an explanation to the masses in the capital of Gaul, I had no choice but to announce that he was the legendary'loyal minister' who was persecuted by the Wudao Faunjun, and let him go! It's damn funny to think about it!"

Finally, he turned around and smiled mysteriously at me:

"But...it's nothing...Before leaving, I sent that perverted calligraphy and painting as a warning. I hope he can best follow my advice...hahahaha..."

Thinking about it now, I finally understand why the old bastard laughed so fucking.

Because.... It's ridiculous indeed!

If sex is prosperous to disaster, cut to permanent governance?

Clam clam clam clam clam clam

Seeing me laughing out of breath, Friegan shook his head strangely:

"Hey...Although it is the son of Lin Dengwan...but he is still an ignorant mortal, unable to understand the deep meaning of the liberator's words, it is really sad!"

I understand... Of course I understand.

Isn't your present awkward ball like a "sexy catastrophe"?

139. The Story of Forgiveness

"Yes, yes... I'm just a common man... can't understand the nonsense of that old thing...hahahaha..."

I laughed out of breath.

Suddenly, he felt that Friegan was also a bit pitiful, and he actually put such a malicious inscription like the old bastard in the study, and confessed it as the most reasonable quote for twenty years.Really laughs at me...

You said that if I tell him the true meaning of this character, will he instantly collapse the Three Views and then be fainted with anger?Hahahahaha...

"Old stuff... Lindentu... did you call your father that way?"

Friegan frowned, looking very unhappy:

"Unexpectedly, such a great person... actually gave birth to such unscrupulous offspring... It is really embarrassing."

Great person?

No matter what I think, it is difficult for me to associate such words with that wretched old guy...really...

But since I have to think so, what can I do?

Thinking of this, I shrugged and said:

"Since Archbishop Friegan admires my father so much, why not just recognize him as a father. Don't worry, this young master doesn't care about the number of cheap brothers in the family. Hahahaha..."

Facing my provocative words, Friegan just smiled contemptuously, and didn't react too much:

"You slander your father like this will only make me despise you even more in my heart. Alas...it's a shame that you have such a beautiful face, and your heart is so filthy..."

Having said this, Friegan sighed again, and a trace of longing appeared on his face again:

"Sure enough... only a peerless beauty like Mr. Lin Dengwan is the most perfect woman in this world!"

and many more!and many more!

The words "sir" and "peerless beauty" are fundamentally in conflict, right?How can a person be a husband and a peerless beauty?

Besides, the smoky glamorous look of the old bastard when she was in women's clothing, and the dusty air all over her body, where does she look like a peerless beauty?It's nonsense.

Thinking of this, I interrupted Friegan's speech again, and asked curiously:

"By the way, when did you see your father wearing women's clothing, Archbishop?"

Don't tell me that the shameless old thing was dressed in women's clothing to attack the Bastille. I still don't believe that he dared to dress up like that in front of his comrades and men...

Wait.... It suddenly occurred to me that there was an oil painting called "Freedom to Lead the People" at home, on which was painted a topless woman leading the uprising people to charge forward.(Ps. This is a very famous oil painting. Many dramas have used the stalk of freely guiding the people~)

I remember that the old bastard seemed to have said... it was given to him by a friend of the Kingdom of Gaul...

Don't tell me, that's the restoration of the scene when attacking the Bastille!

Because if the fake milk my father forcibly squeezed out could have such a heavy weight...that would be too scary, old iron.

Thinking of this, I looked at Friegan anxiously, for fear that he would say "exactly" the answer from his mouth.

"That's after again..."

Fleagan shook his head.

I finally breathed a sigh of relief when Friegan answered like this.

Fortunately, fortunately... the person on the painting is not an old bastard.

You know... I always looked at it as a small yellow picture when I was a kid... I even sublimated it against it... If the old bastard was painted on it, wouldn't I? ...Huh, I feel scared after thinking about it.

At this time, Friegan began to speak again.

"After being released from prison.... I first returned to the royal capital's home. At that time, my father had passed away, and the man who inherited the title was my younger brother." Having said that, Friegan spread his hands helplessly." He was afraid that I would divide his property, and naturally he didn't welcome me, the "evil full" brother, to go home...so soon, I was kicked out."

"But I don't really care about this.... Money and power are just, if it can't be converted into physical pleasure, then it's meaningless to me."

"Therefore... I feel that I would follow the warnings of Lord Linden Wan to me... "Abstinence before marriage, abstinence after marriage", come together specifically to find a woman who really understands me, and then be loyal to her. The most extreme experience!"

Speaking of this, Friegan's face showed a trace of nostalgia.

"So I put on a paintbrush and a notepad... and started a journey across the continent... During my three years of wandering around, I paid for the portraits of people... while looking in my heart The most perfect woman went to many places in the world."

"Finally... Eighteen years ago...I found a perfect woman in Ximu Town under the Frost Mountain."

"She has the most perfect figure and a devilish face.....in the bed is enough to make all men crazy.....It's not an exaggeration. When I first saw her, my soul was Hook away! I can't help myself!"

"After that... I was crazy with her for three days and three nights... I spent all my savings on her again, soaked for several months, and finally touched her and made her willingly Marry me...become my wife."

Having said this, Friegan's emotions became excited again:

"Swear to Heavenly Father... the days with that woman are the happiest time in my life... because her body is so soft and it fits me like that. Whether I am right No matter what outrageous request she made, she would agree without thinking, and perfectly realize my vision! It's not an exaggeration to say... she met all my requirements for a perfect woman at that time!"

After speaking, Fleagan took a few deep breaths, and the expression on his face gradually changed from excitement to anger and distortion.

"But... after a long time... I discovered that she is just a woman after all... and only a woman! She can't fully understand my mind, let alone 100% fit with my body. .... No matter how I develop... the final result... it is nothing more than this!"

Friegan squeezed his fist, his expression turned pale:

"In the beginning... I thought there was still room for recovery... So I wanted to develop her potential as much as possible... But what I never expected was... that incompetent Women not only can't meet my simplest requirements...even...even..."

"I even dare to cuckold me!! It's simply unforgivable!!"

Friegan hissed distortedly.

Looking at Friegan's hysterical look...I couldn't help feeling a little bit sigh.

Alas.... No wonder this guy later became the leader of the cult.

It turned out to be green by my wife...