Chapter 1168 - 848: Reminiscing Year After Year...
"...!"
Shang Ruyi’s heart instantly sank.
The words were like a sharp sword suddenly thrust out of the fog, in a single instant piercing straight through her heart.
Yet pain and helplessness were secondary; what truly robbed her of any response was a confusion heavier than the fog itself. She could only stare wide‑eyed at the still gentle, mild face before her—yet those eyes that seemed to hold a smile, in the instant after those words were spoken, once more froze into ice, without the slightest trace of mirth.
Why would Yu Wenqian say such things?
Why say them tonight?
These past days, though the two sides had already clearly drawn the line and begun to stand opposed for the sake of the Crown Prince, and even more, because of Duke Shenwu’s death, had completely stepped onto a path of life‑and‑death struggle; Yu Wencheng’s bringing that pot of wine into Chengqian Hall had already proclaimed this Crown Prince’s stance. Shang Ruyi could even accept his resentment, his furious curses, even his revenge—yet she had no way to accept what was now before her...
That he was once again speaking of her marriage.
Just like that first night they were alone together back then—same ink‑black night, same rippling sheen of water, moonlight like ice—he had told her: It was you, Shang Ruyi, who cast off me, Yu Wenqian.
Shang Ruyi’s throat tightened. After a long moment, she forced out a hoarse voice: "Imperial Brother..."
But Yu Wenqian seemed not to hear her, and went on smiling as he said, "You did not choose me."
"Elder brother..."
"You chose my second younger brother."
"Crown Prince!"
The four words were urgent yet weighty, like a steel blade suddenly falling, at last severing Yu Wenqian’s seemingly reasonless, yet word by word like needles driving into Shang Ruyi’s heart, speech. But the expression on his face did not change; the smile remained, even carrying a certain unhurried leisure.
His unhurried leisure stood in stark contrast to Shang Ruyi’s utter discomfiture.
Not only that, even her breathing was thrown into disorder—especially in such pitch‑dark night, with only the lake surface not far behind her being ruffled into ripples by a wind blowing from who‑knows‑where, the shimmering water unsteady, unsettling the human heart along with it. Her ragged breath, too, seemed in that moment to be laid bare in its embarrassment under the moonlight.
Then, meeting Yu Wenqian’s slightly raised brows, that expression as if calmly watching her inner upheaval, Shang Ruyi bit down, drew a deep breath, forcing herself to steady.
Then said, "I thought, Your Highness the Crown Prince would not bring this up again."
"Oh? And why is that?"
"Because you once said that you bore no hostility toward me!"
"...!"
Her words made Yu Wenqian’s gaze flicker, yet he did not look away; on the contrary, his eyes grew even keener, as if in that instant seeing straight through Shang Ruyi’s soul.
Shang Ruyi said in a low voice, "Even if, in the eyes of the world, I, Shang Ruyi, cast off you, Yu Wenqian; even if today you marry a fine wife, and she surpasses me by ten thousand measures; even if you have already become Crown Prince, and surpass my husband..."
"..."
"Even if all these are a catastrophe that drowns me, they were nonetheless invited by me, brought upon myself."
"..."
"My own cause and effect will bring my own retribution; it truly has nothing to do with Your Highness the Crown Prince!"
As she spoke this, though she had tried her utmost to remain calm, her voice still trembled unconsciously, like the ever‑widening ripples behind her on the water. And as the words left her lips, she clearly saw Yu Wenqian’s leisurely composure pause, ever so slightly. After a long moment, the corners of his eyes slowly curved.
These were the very words he had once said to her that first night they met in the Yuwen Mansion in Eastern Capital Luoyang.
At that time, Shang Ruyi had not answered him, yet tonight she answered them in full.
And the reason she had not answered back then was not merely because she had not yet figured out what sort of man he truly was, nor what he intended, but even more because of shock. At that time she had been utterly certain that Yu Wenqian would harbor resentment toward her because of her broken engagement, yet unexpectedly, he had been as calm as though he had merely seen a dark cloud drift overhead, without the slightest trace of grievance.
He had even hoped that Shang Ruyi would stop Yu Wenye from securing the chance to send troops to Fufeng.
Back then, Shang Ruyi had wondered—was this man a Buddha?
But now, the answer seemed already to be before her eyes.
"Few become Buddhas, yet many chant of Buddha, chanting on and on through the years..."
As that line of verse floated up again in her mind, it seemed clearer than it had ever been. Shang Ruyi felt as though she had already sensed something, and that battlefield‑honed instinct for danger made her all the more lucid, all the more ill at ease.
She said in a deep voice, "I have disturbed you."
With that, she turned to leave.
But the moment she lifted her foot, her steps stalled where they were—just now, Yu Wenqian had walked past her side, and when she turned back, he was already standing in the path by which she had come. Now, when Shang Ruyi tried to leave, he did not move at all; his tall figure stood like a great mountain, looming in front of her.
He had already blocked the way she had come.
Shang Ruyi’s brows drew together. She lifted her head to look at Yu Wenqian. "Your Highness..."
Yet just as she was caught between going and unable to go, lifting her head, Yu Wenqian suddenly took a step toward her and said, "Are your cause and your retribution truly unrelated to me?"
With that step, his body was almost pressed to Shang Ruyi’s. She had no choice, forced into retreating a step: "Your Highness the Crown Prince!"
"Do you know that it is precisely because of your cause that we have today’s effect?"
"Elder brother!"
"Everything that has come to pass today—this entire effect—was wrought by your cause!"
"Imperial Brother!"
With each sentence he spoke, he stepped closer, and under his relentless advance Shang Ruyi could only retreat again and again. Gradually, she felt the ground beneath her feet grow steeper, more uneven; in her panic, she had backed away from the level avenue paved with bluestone and had reached the lakeside.
This path was not meant for walking; jagged rocks jutted everywhere. Shang Ruyi, inattentive, trod upon a protruding stone and nearly fell!
"Ah!"
She gasped softly, her body swaying twice before she just barely regained her balance. Yet before she was fully steady, she lifted her head, and Yu Wenqian’s tall shadow was once more looming close before her. He gave her not the slightest chance to catch her breath, as though determined to force her yet further back!
Almost by instinct, Shang Ruyi took another step back.
The ground beneath her feet seemed already stained with the dampness of the lake water, turning slick and muddy.
And that willow at the lakeside—just moments ago, Yu Wenqian had been standing beneath it, quietly gazing at the lake. Its bare branches now drooped down, brushing past her ear, her cheek, her side, without the least softness or ease. Instead, they were like a dull blade scraping over skin, sending a chill coursing through her.
Yet Yu Wenqian was still coming forward!
Behind her, the seemingly placid lake surface was already mere inches away. As she retreated another step, she accidentally kicked a small stone, which tumbled into the lake. At once there came the murmur of water; the glittering waves trembled, their light flickering around her, shadows swaying, as if heaven and earth themselves were on the verge of overturning in that instant!
Shang Ruyi panicked. "Yu Wenqian!"