Infinite Nightmares

The moment he finished speaking, the computer fortune-teller spat out the day’s dial-up number: 1423221.

Seeing this, the others all ran toward a nearby iron rod. They grabbed the rod together and, like cranking an old rotary phone, worked in unison to dial using a disc on the ceiling.

"What the—it works like that?" Zhang Wenda ran over to help.

Once they finished cranking, the others instantly scattered. However, the surroundings remained completely unchanged.

Just as Zhang Wenda was thinking the Daoist was a fraud, he turned to go back the way he came and was immediately met with a scene that defied all his expectations.

In contrast to the dilapidated street from before, a chaotic and spectacular vista now unfolded before Zhang Wenda.

As far as the eye could see, the sky was a chaotic, pixelated mosaic. All sorts of characters and lines of code drifted through the air, and there were even some flying computer worms.

The ground was gone, replaced by a boundless black "soil" formed from a torrent of densely packed binary code, a flood of 0s and 1s.

Following the stretch of binary soil to the horizon, Zhang Wenda saw a hill shaped like a giant, bloated "Recycle Bin" icon. Broken icons and file fragments constantly tumbled from its fractured surface.

’Holy crap.’ Zhang Wenda was stunned. ’The Internet World is every bit as weird as the adult world, if not more so.’

Fortunately, Zhang Wenda wasn’t a total rookie anymore; he wouldn’t be as jumpy as when he’d first arrived. After calming himself, he turned to the Auntie at his side.

"Thanks, Auntie. I need to find something to make me stronger. Where should I look? A Superpower or even Qi Gong would be fine."

Hearing this, Auntie didn’t immediately lead the way. Instead, she said seriously, "Kid, I can take you there, but first, there are some rules of the internet you have to follow."

"I’m listening."

"First, this place is full of hostile people. Do your best to avoid contact with others. If someone approaches you out of the blue, they probably have some hidden agenda."

"I get it. Didn’t you already say that? I remember what you told me before. Right now, I just want to ask one thing: If we die in here, are we dead for real?"

At his words, Auntie’s expression immediately grew serious.

When he saw Auntie slowly nod, Zhang Wenda was instantly on high alert. ’High risk for a high reward, just as I thought.’

"Got all that? Alright then, this way." Auntie walked toward several progress bars sticking out of the binary soil nearby.

Zhang Wenda copied her, grabbing hold of a progress bar. As it began to move rapidly, he felt like he was on a bullet train, the surrounding environment blurring as it rushed backward.

"This is a thing too?!" Zhang Wenda yelled to Auntie in astonishment, bracing himself against the fierce wind.

Auntie, who was shielding Song Jianguo with her body, snorted smugly. "You underestimated me, huh? Hmph. I’ve shed more blood than you’ve had hot dinners."

This was a completely unfamiliar territory. Zhang Wenda couldn’t afford to be distracted. He quickly scanned his surroundings, trying his best to adapt to the new environment.

As the progress bar slid onward, a dizzying array of landscapes flashed by: cities, rivers, mountains, and even a stretch of ruins.

As they neared the ruins, Zhang Wenda spotted a sign. In the split second it flashed by, he just barely made out the words on it: "Historical Site of Ancient Northerners Hunting Southerners."

’What the hell?’ The information overload was making Zhang Wenda’s head spin.

Before he could process it, he was looking at a digital green prairie where another sign stood. "Welcome to the Republic of Aminos."

And there, standing on the grasslands of Aminos, was Daoist Tao, a man he’d met once before. His hat was on crooked, and he was in the middle of a hip-hop rap.

"Yo, yo~ You ain’t even a premium member, how you gonna battle me..."

’What is any of this?’ Zhang Wenda thought, dazedly trying to absorb all the chaotic information.

But he quickly had to stop looking. It was all too much, too chaotic. His brain simply couldn’t record it all.

Seeing his reaction, Auntie and Song Jianguo snickered at his side. "Kid, you can’t try to see everything in the Internet World. Just focus on what you need to do. Otherwise, you’ll be completely overwhelmed."

"Then why didn’t you say so earlier?" Zhang Wenda shook his head, trying to clear it of all the useless information.

"Consider it a little punishment. Who told you to bully Mimi?"

"So where are we going now?" Zhang Wenda asked.

"To a city. There should be an information desk there where you can search for what you need!"

Before Zhang Wenda could say another word, the progress bar beneath his feet screeched to a halt, sending him and the others flying.

As he tumbled upside down through the air, he saw a giant neon sign: "MD Multi-Beauty City." He was sure he hadn’t misread it—it was definitely the character for "beauty."

"What’s going on?" Zhang Wenda had just scrambled to his feet when a shadow fell over him. He looked up to see a Chinese character for "Mom," twice his height, smashing down toward him.

"Danger!" Zhang Wenda slammed his feet into the ground and lunged forward.

He barely dodged the giant "Mom" character, only for the character "De" to come crashing down right after it.

After diving behind a pixelated piece of cover, Zhang Wenda cautiously peeked out. He saw a scene that made it clear the entire city had descended into utter chaos.

All kinds of people were screaming curses at each other, and every single profanity they uttered materialized into a solid projectile, hurtling toward its target.

Characters with an extremely high "mom-content" flew and crashed everywhere, riddling the once-beautiful neon city with holes. Toppled skyscrapers littered the ground, transforming the area into a brutal battlefield.

"Are you sure this is the right place?" Zhang Wenda asked, stunned.

But Auntie was clearly just as surprised. "It wasn’t like this when Mimi and I were here before."

Hearing this, Zhang Wenda flared up. "Could you be any less reliable?!"

Auntie immediately refused to take the blame. "How was I supposed to know it would turn out like this? You think it’s my fault? I’ve only been here one other time!"

"Look out!" Song Jianguo pointed upward. Two flying curses had collided above their heads, and now the shrapnel rained down on them like a meteor shower.

The Black Cats instantly transformed into a large black umbrella, shielding the three of them from the profane shrapnel.

Peeking out from under the large umbrella and seeing the danger had passed, Zhang Wenda breathed a sigh of relief. He couldn’t be bothered to argue with Auntie in a situation like this. After quickly getting his bearings, he said to the other two, "Let’s move. We need to get out of this city. It’s way too dangerous here!"

"Kid, I forgot one more thing," Auntie said. "In the Internet World, you can’t apply the rules of the real world."

"You think I need you to tell me that?! I’m not blind! At this point, nothing that happens here could possibly surprise me!"

The words were barely out of his mouth when his foot slipped, kicking a ceramic tea mug lying nearby. With a puff of black smoke, a man emerged from it. He wore a Zhongshan suit and tortoiseshell glasses, giving him the air of an old-fashioned government official.

The man’s lower body was made of mist. In the hands of his upper body, he held another white ceramic tea mug.

Floating in the air, he looked down at the astonished Zhang Wenda, took a sip from his mug, and announced solemnly, "Greetings, young man! I am the Lamp God!"

’Huh?! I can even run into a Lamp God here?!’

Zhang Wenda froze, but his shock quickly turned to elation. ’A Lamp God! I know what he’s going to say next! He’s going to grant me three wishes!’

Under Zhang Wenda’s expectant gaze, the Lamp God spoke. "Young man, since you are the one who released me... excellent. Now, you must grant *me* three wishes."