Chapter 170
Heather
After a long, hot shower, we went in search of Cosette. It was still early, but I’d wake her up if I needed to. We walked from my dorm back across the quad to the admin building. Light broke through the trees, sending God-rays down on us. If I could’ve felt peaceful, I would’ve, but I couldn’t. The image of Brent’s head rolling into the hell mouth was burned into my brain.
I blinked, trying to focus on the trees. On the ground underneath my feet. On Brent’s hand warm in mine... He’d barely let me out of his sight to shower and change, and I didn’t mind that one bit. I was feeling more than a little clingy.
Stop thinking about it, his voice came through the bond.
I’m trying, but I can’t help it. I’m really scared. I swallowed the lump in my throat. I don’t want to die. And I definitely don’t want you to die.
Your fear is drowning everything else out. You have to go of it. It’s not going to do us any good.
His determination that things would go well burned through our bond, but he hadn’t seen what I had. Easier said than done.
I know. Just try.
I was trying, but man—I was shaken to the core with this. How could I not be? Everything I had was on the line. Brent. My friends’ lives. Even my life.
There’d always been risk, but it had never felt more real. Even when I was scared for myself, it’d never occurred to me to be scared for Brent.
He was such a good fighter, and he’d always been so strong. I really thought he was invincible...
But he could die. We could all die. Tonight. Tomorrow.
This could be it for us. It wasn’t a huge leap to understand why I was so scared. The terror gripped me until it was like I was moving through a fog.
Now wasn’t the time to be foggy.
Because giving up seemed like a totally valid option at this point.
Running sounded pretty good, too.
But if I could stop it entirely—stop Luciana before we ended up in some decrepit church with an open portal to hell—then that would be fantastic.
I tasted blood, and let go of my lip. I hadn’t even realized I was biting it.
Cherie. Brent’s rumble came through the bond. A note of warning lit in his voice.
I know. I was freaking out, and I needed to stop.
We headed straight up the stairs in the main building, which held the admin rooms and offices on the bottom floors. Above that was the infirmary. The guest suites were on the top floor.
They usually housed the parents of students, visiting teachers, or Cazadores. Even though plenty of alphas and Cazadores were staying on campus, they were all in the dorms.
The few witches who’d broken from la Aquelarre had the floor to themselves.
Mr. Langdon had thought giving them their own space would be best. They mostly stuck around there or the library. The only one who didn’t care about the Weres and went where she pleased was Cosette. She’d been spending afternoons sunning in the quad, but she wasn’t an early riser. I’d be shocked to see her anywhere before noon.
I couldn’t help but smirk at the idea of waking her up as we climbed to the third floor. If I had to be awake at this hour, it was only fair that she should feel my pain.
I wasn’t sure which room was hers, but I used my senses to sniff her out. Her scent wasn’t like anything else I’d come across. The best way I could describe it was sugar water in the moonlight.
Which was ridiculous, because moonlight didn’t smell. But if it helped me find her, I wasn’t going to question.
My nose led me to the third room on the right. Of course. That room had one of the tinier windows, but the best view over the quad.
I knocked three times.
No answer.
I knocked two more times.
No answer.
Just as I went to knock a third time, she spoke up. "You want to keep that hand?"
Oh, no. She was not going to take that tone with me. "I need to talk to you."
"Come back in four hours."
"I can’t wait that long." I jiggled the door handle, but it was locked. Not that it would hold against my Were strength. "I’m coming in. You can either let me in or I’ll let myself in."
"You’re going to regret it." The faint rustle of sheets carried through the door along with a lot of what I assumed were fey curses.
"I already regret the need for it." I leaned against the wall as I waited. "Do you think I’d be here this early if it wasn’t important?"
The door swung open. Cosette stood in a sheer white robe that didn’t quite hit her at mid-thigh. Her tiny, pale blue nightgown peeked from underneath and I shot Brent a look. Don’t even go there.
wouldn’t dare, he said through the bond as he stared at the ceiling.
I elbowed him and then pushed past Cosette.
The rooms up here were all the same. Small single beds in simple frames made with crisp white sheets and comforters. Each one had a small wooden table with a lamp and a full bathroom. With so little inside, the rooms were usually pretty tidy.
Not Cosette’s. Clothes were strewn all over the floor. I wasn’t sure if they were all dirty or if some were clean. I tried to watch where I was putting my feet, but it was no easy task. "Glad to see you’ve made yourself at home."
Cosette crossed her arms. God. She’d just rolled out of bed, but her hair fell around her face in perfect blonde-brown ringlets. That had to be something to do with being fey, because it definitely wasn’t human. "If you woke me up to criticize my housekeeping, we’re going to have a problem."
"No. Sorry. I..." I swallowed as the fear came back two-fold. "I wanted to talk to you about visions."
Cosette shook her head, making her curls bounce.
"Hardly anything I know applies to your type of magic. You’d be better off talking to Yvonne or Elsa."
I sat down on the edge of her bed. Brent leaned against the doorway, hands shoved into the pockets of his faded and battered jeans. He gave me the slightest nod.
I met Cosette’s brown gaze with my own. "I don’t know them well enough to know if they’d lie to me." I hoped they wouldn’t, but they might try to soften the reality. I needed brutal honesty. Cosette was the girl for that. "I know you’ll tell me the truth, even if it’s seriously sucky."
"That’s true." She straightened. "What did you see that’s got you so worked up?"
I told her the basics—leaving out the part about the fey dude for now—and then asked my million-dollar question. "Can I change what I saw? Or is it set in stone? I need to know if there’s hope." I tried to keep the desperation out of my voice, but failed miserably. Holding my breath, I waited.
Cosette tilted her head from side to side as she thought about it. "I don’t know."
Not exactly what I wanted to hear. "But it could change?"
"Maybe. Maybe not." She twirled the belt of her robe around a finger, her eyes out of focus and distant. "But is that the best question to be asking?"
Was she kidding? "What other question is there?" If I couldn’t change the future...
I didn’t even want to think about that.
"Don’t worry about possible. Worry what to do with the information you have." Cosette leaned forward, peering at me so intently I almost leaned back.
"Knowing what you know, will you still fight Luciana? Even if costs your life?" She gestured toward Brent. "His life? That’s what I’d be asking."
Brent seemed calm enough, leaning against the doorframe, but a trace of fear mixed in with his confidence and determination. Losing him would be awful. If I had to die to defeat Luciana, I at least wanted him to survive and I’d do pretty much anything to make that happen, even if it was selfish.
I knew someone else would stand against her eventually, but could they win? Even if I tried to run, I had a feeling that I’d still end up in that church eventually.
Just with a lot more blood on my hands.