Chapter 210 - Two Quiet Lives Together
Graduation passed without any dramatic moment.
No tearful farewell between Kuro and Aoi.
No promises that they would never grow old.
No fears that their relationship would vanish with the end of university studies.
They just stood together outside the university library watching other students going away from the university campus with boxes of books and bags with memories.
Aoi held her diploma in her hands.
"So this is how it all ends?"
Kuro looked at her.
"You sound disappointed."
"I am."
She looked in the direction of the library.
"I spent so many Saturdays there."
"Almost all Saturdays with me."
"That’s right."
Kuro smiled.
Aoi leant against his shoulder.
"Do you remember when we met for the first time here?"
"Of course."
"I thought you were just the same quiet boy as in high school."
"I was."
"You were quieter than now."
"Maybe you talked too much."
Aoi immediately looked hurt.
"I did not!"
Kuro raised his eyebrow.
Aoi stared at him.
Then she burst into laughter.
"Okay."
"A little bit, maybe."
They stayed there for some time.
University was where their relationship started again.
Where they got their books, coffee, homeworks, rain, and eventually enough courage to declare their feelings.
They were leaving the university now.
But none of them was scared.
They were leaving together.
---
Their careers developed differently.
Kuro continued studying and eventually opened a small counseling clinic.
It was no big building.
There was no big sign on it.
There was only the waiting room with comfortable chairs, a small bookcase, and a plant which Aoi made him keep alive.
Kuro liked simple spaces.
A place where you can sit and feel comfortable.
His methods were easy.
First, listen.
Second, speak.
Never think that a man or a woman is weak just because he or she needs your help.
Aoi perfectly understood his choice.
"You were always good at listening," she told him one evening.
Kuro looked up from his papers.
"You think so?"
"I know so."
She put a cup of tea next to him.
"You listened to me even before you knew you were in love with me."
Kuro smiled.
"I probably should have realized earlier."
"Definitely."
---
Aoi found her own way in educational psychology.
She became a school counselor helping children with various troubles, like anxiety, learning disorders, family problems, or difficult feelings related to growing up.
She was such a peaceful person that students easily talked to her.
Some of them started talking immediately.
Other children stayed silent in the first few consultations before they said anything.
Aoi never rushed them.
She understood that silence can mean so much.
Sometimes it means fear.
Sometimes embarrassment.
Sometimes a man or a woman need to know that someone will stay even if he or she will not talk.
Kuro was impressed by that.
One evening Aoi came home very tired.
She threw her bag on the floor and fell down on the couch.
"Tough day?"
Kuro asked.
She nodded.
"Very tough."
He gave her a cup of tea.
Aoi looked at the cup.
Then at him.
"You’re learning."
"I had a good teacher."
She smiled.
"Who?"
"You."
She leant her head against his shoulder.
"You taught me to make tea?"
"You taught me when someone needs comfort, you do not need to ask what he or she needs."
Aoi closed her eyes.
"You’re doing well."
"I’m practicing."
---
Their wedding was quite simple.
This was exactly what they wanted.
No big ceremony.
No unnecessary show.
Just their family, friends, and all those people who were with them all their life.
Aoi wore simple white wedding dress.
Kuro was standing beside her and was quite nervous although he tried to hide it.
When she came close to him, he looked at her for several seconds.
Aoi smiled.
"You’re staring."
"You look beautiful."
Her cheeks turned pink.
"You are supposed to say that."
"I mean it."
She lowered her eyes.
"Then I will accept it."
During the wedding ceremony Kuro held her hand.
Aoi’s fingers were trembling a little bit.
He softly squeezed her hand.
She instantly relaxed.
They made their vows not trying to make them sound important.
They promised to listen to each other.
To be honest.
To support each other’s dreams.
To stay together during hard times.
To choose each other every day.
When it was finally over, Aoi looked at Kuro.
"Well..."
"We are married."
Kuro smiled.
"We are."
She leant closer.
"Is there something different?"
He thought for a minute.
"No."
Aoi laughed.
"Good."
---
Their first apartment was quite small.
There was a bedroom.
Kitchen.
Living room which was barely able to contain two bookshelves.
Aoi immediately filled one of the shelves with books on educational psychology.
Kuro filled another one with counseling textbooks.
Then they began filling those bookshelves with novels, poetry books, old university textbooks, books which they bought just because they liked the cover.
Quite soon, there were books everywhere.
Aoi complained.
"We need another shelf."
Kuro looked around.
"We bought two recently."
"And they are already full."
"We could just stop buying books."
Aoi looked at him.
Kuro quickly changed his mind.
"That was a terrible suggestion."
"Yes."
---
Their marriage was peaceful.
Not perfect.
Peaceful.
Sometimes Kuro came home feeling very tired after a hard day at his clinic.
Sometimes Aoi came home frustrated because she could not stop thinking about the students who needed her help.
Sometimes they argued about household chores.
Sometimes one of them forgot to buy food.
Sometimes they ate instant noodles because they were too tired to cook.
But they always talked.
This became the base of their marriage.
Late nights, when the lights were off, when the whole neighborhood went to sleep, they lay beside each other and talked.
They talked about their patients.
Their students.
Their dreams.
Their fears.
Things which had happened twenty years ago.
Things they wanted to do tomorrow.
Sometimes they talked until two in the morning.
Sometimes they did not talk at all.
Aoi understood that marriage was not about always being excited about something.
It was about someone who stays with you when excitement leaves you.
Someone who remains when life becomes ordinary.
Someone who can sit beside you in silence without making this silence uncomfortable.
One winter evening Aoi sat beside Kuro near their bedroom window.
It was snowing outside.
She leant her head against his shoulder.
"Do you remember rain?"
Kuro smiled.
"The umbrella?"
"Yes."
"We both were getting wet."
"You were getting wet."
"You had the umbrella."
"And you tilted it towards me."
Kuro looked at her.
"I did not want you getting wet."
Aoi smiled.
"This is when I realized."
"Realized what?"
She looked at their hands.
"That I feel safest with you."
Kuro gently interwove his fingers with her.
"And now?"
Aoi leant her head against him again.
"Now I feel at home."
Kuro said nothing.
He did not need to.
Outside it was still snowing.
Inside it was warm.
Two psychology books were lying open on the table.
Two cups of tea were cooling beside them.
Aoi’s bag was lying near the door.
Kuro’s paperwork was waiting for the next day.
Nothing was extraordinary about this evening.
And it was exactly this fact which made it beautiful.
Once they met again in the university library.
They fell in love in ordinary Saturdays.
They walked together in rain.
Now they are building their life one ordinary day after another.
Aoi slowly closed her eyes.
"Kuro?"
"Hm?"
"Promise me something."
"What?"
"Even if we are old..."
She took his hand.
"...We will speak to each other like this."
Kuro looked at her.
"Of everything?"
"Yes."
He smiled.
"I promise."
Aoi smiled at him.
Then they continued reading their books.
Two simple lives.One common home.
And a love which did not require noisy words to be expressed.
The first winter of their marriage came unexpectedly for both of them.
It became cold in the mornings.
Fog appeared on the windows every time they were cooking.
Aoi began to wear thick socks inside their home, while Kuro understood that despite all the blankets, she managed somehow to take them all during the nights.
Once in the morning Kuro woke up with almost naked body.
He looked at Aoi.
She slept peacefully, wrapped into the blanket like a cocoon.
"Aoi."
Nothing.
"Aoi."
Again silence.
Kuro tried to pull the blanket from her.
Aoi just tightened her hold.
He stared at her.
"...You surely do not need all of that."
Half awake Aoi murmured:
"I am cold."
"You hold all the blanket."
"I feel comfortable."
Kuro sighed.
It was useless to argue with her logic.
Instead, he got up and prepared breakfast.
Several minutes later Aoi came to the kitchen wearing one of his too big sweaters.
Kuro looked at her.
"That one is mine."
She looked at the floor.
"...Maybe."
"That is my favorite sweater."
"It was cold."
"You could have asked."
"I knew that you would have agreed."
Kuro looked at her.
Aoi smiled innocently.
Unable to resist himself he began to laugh.
"You become very troublesome."
"To late."
She approached him and looked at breakfast.
"What are you preparing?"
"Something simple."
"It has something to do with coffee?"
"Obviously."
"Then I am forgiven."
---
Their morning ritual slowly became predictable.
Kuro woke up first.
Aoi slept for ten minutes more, sometimes for fifteen, sometimes even for twenty.
She said that extra minutes were necessary for her psychological well-being.
Kuro believed that she liked just sleeping.
After the breakfast they went to work together, when it was possible.
Kuro went to his clinic.
Aoi went to the school, where she worked as a counselor.
Before separation they said to each other the same old words.
"Have a good day."
"You too."
Then they separated.
It was not romantic in any way.
No one watching them could assume that they saw something amazing.
But for Aoi this simple goodbye was very important.
It showed that someone awaited her at home.
---
One evening Aoi returned home much later than usual.
Kuro sat at the dining table looking at his notes.
He immediately turned his attention to her.
"You are late."
Aoi took off her shoes.
"I know."
"Everything is alright?"
She nodded.
"One of the students needed somebody to talk to."
Kuro did not ask for details.
He knew better.
Instead he got up and began to move to the kitchen.
"Have you eaten?"
Aoi shook her head.
"I was not hungry."
"That was not my question."
She looked at him.
"You become really strict."
"Occupational disease."
Aoi smiled weakly.
Kuro prepared something warm.
While he was preparing food, Aoi sat at the table and watched him.
After several minutes she whispered:
"Sometimes I wonder whether I help anybody."
Kuro stopped his work.
Aoi looked down.
"You spend the whole day listening to the problems of others."
"Sometimes they leave feeling better."
"Sometimes they don’t."
"And sometimes I go home thinking whether I said the right thing."
Kuro put the food in front of her.
"Have you listened to her?"
"Yes."
"Did you take her seriously?"
"Yes."
"Did you remain, when they needed someone?"
Aoi nodded.
"Then maybe you have done enough for today."
She looked at him.
"That’s all?"
"For today."
Aoi smiled.
"You become really reasonable."
"I’ve heard that."
She took a bite.
Her expression softened.
"This is tasty."
"You were hungry."
"...Maybe."
Kuro returned to his notes.
Aoi ate quietly.
After several minutes she whispered:
"Thank you."
He looked up.
"For what?"
"Nothing."
Kuro smiled.
"Alright."
He returned to his work.
Aoi continued eating.
Sometimes it was enough for them.
No advice.
No attempts to solve all their problems.
Only dinner.
Warm house.
And someone who remained at home.
---
Later in the evening they sat together at the sofa.
Aoi was reading a book about development of a child.
Kuro read the journal about psychology.
Their legs touched beneath the blanket.
For almost an hour nobody talked.
Then suddenly Aoi said:
"Kuro."
"Hm?"
"Do you ever regret marrying me?"
Kuro slowly put his book aside.
"Where it came from?"
"Nowhere."
"That is not true."
Aoi sighed.
"I just wondered."
Kuro completely closed his book.
"Aoi."
She looked at him.
"I do not regret it."
"Not even a little?"
"Not even when you steal my blankets?"
"Especially then."
She smiled.
"And when you steal my sweaters?"
"The case is under consideration."
She smiled.
Kuro took her hand.
"I do not need a perfect marriage."
The expression of Aoi softened.
"I just want us to continue talking."
"Even when we are angry?"
"Especially then."
"Even when we are tired?"
"Especially then."
She laid her head to his shoulder.
Kuro put his head gently to hers.
Outside the snow began to fall.
Inside the house their small home remained silent.
Two books lay open on the table.
Two cups of tea remained untouched.
Tomorrow will bring to them work.
Appointments.
Students.
Problems which they could not solve right now.
But now they had each other.
And for both Kuro and Aoi it was enough.
Their marriage was not based on spectacular romantic moments.
It was based on small actions.
Preparation of dinner for the other one, when he or she was tired.
Listening to the problems of the other one, when it was difficult.
Remembering how much sugar should be in a cup of coffee.
Leaving the last blanket alone.
Waiting at the door.
Goodnight.
And waking up the next morning, knowing that they would choose each other again.
Aoi closed her eyes.
"Kuro?"
"Yes?"
"I am glad that we found each other again."
He squeezed her hand gently.
"So am I."
And under the silent winter night their first year of marriage continued exactly the way they desired it to be.
Quietly.
Simply.
Together.