Only with Your Heart

I had a bad feeling about it since the sound of the fierce hooves (hives) shaking the ground had subsided from afar. At that time, Ruklov was only an eight-year-old boy, celebrating his next birthday in a month.

In your hand, you will find a bunny rabbit with an arrow.

He recently captured his first living prey with bow-and-arrow techniques he had begun to learn from his father. My father was so keen to teach Luklov swords and bows and arrows these days that he would surely be pleased with this success.

With that in mind, we were well on our way back to the Mansion.

Dusk.

Behind it was a grey eastern sky that had already begun to darken. The first thing I heard was so little noise that I couldn't pick it up if I didn't clear my ears. That, soon, turns into a strong sound that strikes the tympanic membrane, and the earth conveys vibrations.

At least ten of them...... maybe more. Large stunning horses...... with armored and armed humans riding and running......

A sharp killing spirit was transmitted, goosebumps appeared, and Ruklov instinctively hid himself in the bushes at the end of the road. Fortunately, the tall dead grass seemed lush.

Place the tailored prey on the ground and place the bow and arrow on your back at an angle to make it difficult to find it.

Gradually, the earth's vibrations increase.

The enemy is approaching......

Yes, when they were enemies, Ruklov figured out why.

At the same time, Ruklov's heartbeat grew more and more intense as his hooves sounded. The dodgy and pulsating heart becomes too intense for him to be young.

At last, as an army of enemies approached his eyes, Ruklov set his bow at right angles, desperately suppressing the nausea that was coming up.

The rider's outline came into view, but more than half of it was covered with iron helmets, invisible to the face. Ruklov rebelled in his chest at what his father had taught him desperately.

Cusho, Nerae.

Canaraz, Iteno, Ugoki,..., Yonde...

Without waving their sides, they were headed straight for Baron's Mansion, the raw house of Luklov. Not very much, but it didn't look like a bunch of friendly merchants coming to negotiate the price of spices and horses.

It's a burglar attack.

─ ─ Now. Come on, come on!

But for the first battle of his life against a living human being, Ruklov's young hand as he grew up was nervous and trembled in small pieces.

The horse runs at full speed. The opponent rides a dozen. I couldn't set a goal.

When Ruklov managed to release the arrow, it was already slow and to the extent that he finally scratched around the rear horse's ass, he fell into the bush across the street.

".................. Huh!

Ruklov stood up and desperately followed the thief.

Tonight, the prey of the two rabbits, which was supposed to be praised by my father, remains in the bush.

The leg of an eight-year-old boy can't be the run of a grand horse. The invasion had already begun when Ruklov reached the front of the mansion.

Livestock, which should have been in the fence, is running all over the place with a strange squeal.

One of my servants, whom I had known since I was a baby, dyed my chest bright red and fell beside the gate, motionless.

I heard a scream.

There's a noise of things being broken.

The fury of the rogues was sounding like a nightmare.

For the first time in his life, Ruklov learned his true intent to kill and strongly consolidated his readiness to wave his sword at his enemies--I 'll kill you, you thief! Father!

…………

Since then, there hasn't been a night I haven't dreamed of that evening event.

Every night, every night...... a long nightmare, one that visits softly the moment Ruklov lets go of consciousness and keeps him in pain until morning arrives.

Even when I lost my parents and wandered around the city like an orphan. So coincidentally, even at the beginning, he was expected by the King to stand himself in the royal palace as a knight apprentice and be hailed as the best warrior he rarely sees.

That didn't change.

How can you be stronger than anyone else?

Why do you think you're braver than everyone else?

Luklov knew.

─ ─ Because I still can't forgive myself for not being able to shoot a thief that evening. So Ruklov fought bravely more than anyone else. I didn't even allow myself to miss one enemy. He worked harder than anyone, was on the front line ahead of us, and fought more spectacularly than any enemy.

There was always a shadow in my heart of my father and mother that day I couldn't save.

And in my dreams, I had an eight-year-old self, who cried halfway in front of a burnt raw house. Every night. Every night......

…………

It was that night that Lucrov stopped having nightmares for the first time like that, saving a witch who emerged from another world from the beast.

Let's get this straight.

At the time, Ruklov was pleased with his work as the Knight Commander of the Evil Dragon Exorcism, which he had just been given. Lone, who became a subordinate, was half-hearted, as was the presence of the witch and the witch who should have appeared.

─ ─ But.

Witches didn't just have the power to defeat evil dragons.

She also erased the sorrow and nightmare in Ruklov with her hands, with her smile and with her heart. She was the first woman Luklov loved wholeheartedly, a lover he would continue to love until the end, and was all about Luklov.

Let's build a castle for you.

Ruklov promised her.

It certainly did come true... of, maybe.

…………

Gently open the closed eyes.

In front of Ruklov there was a small, feminine and beautifully put together room in a stone castle. Now next to Ruklov's master bedroom, which became the castle owner, is a private room that his wife should have used.

There was still no one there today.

And maybe, a future perennial robbery... the woman who should use this room, she's not coming home.

The maiden who took a look at the boy's day nightmare from Ruklov gave Ruklov another nightmare and disappeared forever.

Every night, from the shallow sleep I finally visit, the moment I wake up.

That despair in the blink of an eye that makes me reconfirm that she's still not here.

That was the nightmare she left behind for Luklov. It's been fourteen years... coming and coming mornings, sometimes daytime, evening, midnight... nightmares that strike, swell, and hurt Lucroff all the time, all the time.

There were times when I tried to have hope.

But Luklov has already forgotten how to even hold that hope.

Little chairs that I could think of her, floral sheets and carpets, all I could ask for was sadness anymore.

I didn't even know how to weep anymore.

Still, Luklov sometimes, stands in this room.

And I closed my eyes, 'If'... I imagined such a vain future. Or it was just one year, hit by memories of happy past.

It was then that Con, Con, and the wooden knock sounded and the curly hairy boy appeared out of the unlocked door leading to the master bedroom.

"Rucrof-like? Oh, I knew it was here. He wasn't in the master bedroom, so I looked for him."

"Nadal."

The boy has been a former orphan used by Ruklov as a servant for several years. "I told you not to disturb me here except when I had some serious business."

"Excuse me, but the truth is, I have a strange visitor, and now I'm making a scene in the hall asking you to meet the Duke of Ruklov."

Nadal was not particularly evil, and he told him so all the time. I also liked Ruklov for not knowing the scary things about this boy, but maybe I should teach him a little more, something called courtesy.

Ruklov took Nadal back to the master bedroom.

"What are weird visitors?

"But he was the head of a village on the eastern edge of the territory. He's a bear kind of guy named Rodolgo. I guess I haven't had a bath in about six months. It stinks."

With an exaggerated gesture, Nadal explained.

"I guess I'm here to stir up the money anyway. I'll send an inspection later if necessary. Now just give me the meal and the food and water on the way home."

"I thought you said that..."

It was unusual for Nadal, it seemed so clumsy to say, and then he continued whispering to tell a secret story.

"Actually, that guy, he's saying weird things. Mr. Ruklov's been looking for him at his house right now... what did he say? Heavenly Woman, was it? Anyway, there's a beauty with long dark hair and an unusual face, and Lady Ruklov should want to see her - so she's persistent."

Ruklov's movements stopped.

I felt like my breathing, even my heartbeat, had stopped. It's like a continuation of a nightmare...

"... are you sure?

"Yeah. I guess I finally went crazy, that guy. Do you want to keep me connected to the dungeon for a while?

"No..."

Ruklov thought.

No, you're not.

Even thoughts don't turn around well already. Always is. I should have given up already, but when it came to 'her', Ruklov's head stopped moving properly.

Always, always.

Even at the heart of the matter.

"... let's talk to him. Either way, I thought it was time to go to that neighborhood for an inspection."

Nadal puts his neck up.

"So do you want to prepare soldiers for inspection?

"I don't need to--" Ruklov's lips were spinning words at will. "I'll go."

…………

I didn't have hope.

Even if... 'if'... even if it were her, I didn't think that the dry, current heart of Ruklov would be able to accept its existence even now.

But still...... Ruklov couldn't help but go.

It was already even like a sweet curse engraved on my soul.

Chizuru.

That was her name.

Never again, I would call you with this mouth, it was a name I gave up and swore to.

[Genesis-now]