Chapter 96 -
Wenzhe and Yueqing stood frozen in the hallway like two marble statues, staring at each other in pure, unadulterated horror.
The two servants, totally oblivious to the biological weapon currently ticking inside the couple’s stomachs, quickly bowed again. "E-Excuse us, General, Young Madam! We will just take this wine jar to the Governor’s table now!"
They carefully picked up the heavy clay jar from the table and scurried away down the corridor toward the main garden, leaving the hallway completely quiet once more.
The second the servants were out of earshot, Yueqing’s mind exploded into complete, chaotic panic, sending her inner voice roaring straight into Wenzhe’s brain.
[NINE! NINE, HELP ME! HOW FAST DOES THAT PHYSICIAN’S LAXATIVE WORK?!] Yueqing shrieked hysterically. [I BOUGHT THIS STUFF FROM THE OLD DOCTOR BACK AT THE XI MANSION! AM I GOING TO DIE ON THE GOVERNOR’S CARPET?! IS GENERAL BLOCK-OF-WOOD GOING TO HAVE TO CARRY ME TO THE BATHROOM IN FRONT OF THE ENTIRE CAPITAL HIGH SOCIETY?! MY REPUTATION! MY VILLAIN POINTS! EVERYTHING IS DOOMED!]
Wenzhe’s right eye twitched violently as her mental screaming vibrated inside his skull. He quickly pressed his hand against his stomach, his stoic face turning a shade paler.
She got it from our mansion’s old physician?! Wenzhe thought, a cold sweat breaking out on the back of his neck. That old doctor uses heavy-duty herbs! I am a grand general of the empire... I cannot lose a battle to a cup of tampered fruit wine!
[Host, please calm down,] Nine’s robotic voice chimed in dryly inside her head. [The herbal formula from the Xi mansion doctor takes approximately twenty minutes to digest before full effect.]
[IS THERE A CURE?! TELL ME THERE’S A CURE!] Yueqing yelled mentally.
[Scanning medical database...] Nine replied smoothly. [To completely neutralize the herbal laxative before it kicks in, you both need to drink concentrated ginger juice boiled with warm water and a pinch of salt within the next fifteen minutes. It will neutralize the stomach reaction immediately.]
[CONCENTRATED GINGER JUICE WITH SALT?! GOT IT!] Yueqing gasped out loud, quickly grabbing Wenzhe by his heavy silk sleeves. "Wenzhe! We have fifteen minutes!"
Wenzhe had to pretend he couldn’t hear her chaotic inner thoughts. He raised an eyebrow, maintaining a clueless and stoic expression despite the ticking stomach bomb.
"Fifteen minutes for what?" Wenzhe asked calmly, crossing his broad arms over his chest.
Yueqing looked up at him in sheer desperation, her eyes big and frantic. "For the laxatives, Wenzhe! The wine we just drank was spiked with heavy-duty laxatives from our old doctor at the mansion!"
Wenzhe stared at her, his composure finally breaking as he glared down at her. "Who brings laxatives to a banquet, Yueqing?! Why are you always causing trouble everywhere we go?!"
"I had my reasons!" Yueqing snapped back, stomping her foot.
[Because I needed my villain points, you foolish Block of Wood! And you’re the one who forced me to drink it back through a kiss!] her brain shouted furiously inside his head.
Wenzhe pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath to keep his temper in check. "We are staying overnight at the Governor’s guest pavilion. We can’t just run out to the carriage without raising suspicion."
"Then we need that cure in our guest room now!" Yueqing hissed.
[Move your big legs, Block of Wood! Move! We need that ginger juice before our guts explode!] her brain shouted inside his head.
Wenzhe didn’t argue further. He reached out, grabbed Yueqing firmly by her waist, and yanked her right along with him as he marched back toward the main garden to excuse them for the night.
When they emerged back into the brightly lit garden courtyard, the banquet was at its peak. Music was playing, laughing noblemen were tossing back cups of wine, and Zhao Mingyuan was still trying and failing to get a rise out of Lanyin, who was gracefully ignoring him near the central tables.
The moment Lanyin saw her brother and Yueqing walking back into the garden, she stood up, her eyes widening in confusion. Wenzhe was marching like he was heading into battle, his stoic jaw set tight, while Yueqing was practically jogging alongside him.
"Brother? Sister In-Law?" Lanyin called out softly as they approached. "Is everything alright?"
"We are retiring to our guest room early," Wenzhe said in a low, clipped tone, not even stopping his fast stride. "I have a sudden headache."
"Wait, retiring already?!" Young Master Song’s voice cut in from a nearby table. He stepped forward, looking genuinely concerned as his eyes landed on Yueqing. "Young Madam Xi, are you feeling unwell too? You both look terribly pale..."
"Everything is fantastic, Young Master Song!" Yueqing blurted out, giving him a terrifyingly strained smile while her legs twitched. "Just... sudden, intense fatigue! Goodnight!"
Before anyone could ask another question, Yueqing caught the eye of a passing Governor’s house maid and quickly waved her over.
"You! Come here!" Yueqing whispered urgently, taking the maid aside while trying not to look like she was in mortal danger. She quickly gave the maid exact instructions, repeating everything Nine had taught her word-for-word. "Listen carefully. Go to the kitchen right now. Crushed raw ginger juice, mixed with boiling water and a pinch of coarse salt. Bring two hot cups to the General’s guest chamber within ten minutes, or your Governor will have a very messy disaster on his hands! Understood?!"
The maid blinked in utter shock at the strange request, but seeing the General’s death-glare behind Yueqing, she bowed frantically. "Y-Yes, Young Madam! Right away!"
With the order placed, Wenzhe and Yueqing practically sprinted down the quiet corridors toward the Governor’s guest wing, ducking into their private room and slamming the heavy wooden doors shut.
Yueqing collapsed against the closed door, clutching her stomach with a massive sigh of relief. "Phew... the maid is bringing it..."
Then, she slowly raised her eyes and looked at Wenzhe, who was standing across the room with his arms crossed, staring at her with dark, icy eyes as they waited for the drink.
[Wait a second...] Yueqing’s mind suddenly realized something as she looked at his handsome, irritated face. [We still have ten minutes before the maid gets here with the ginger juice... and we’re totally alone in this room!]
A slow, sly, evil cat-grin spread across Yueqing’s face.
She remembered Nine’s system notification loud and clear: As long as you are aggressively kissing General Xi for the next 48 hours, you will receive endless +1 Villain Points every second!
Wenzhe saw her grin, and his heart dropped right into his boots. "Su Yueqing... don’t you dare."
"Oh, Block of Wood~" Yueqing purred, marching across the room and backing him right against the bedpost. "Since we’re waiting for ginger juice anyway, might as well make some profit!"