Chapter 607: This Pain Is Too Much
Luca’s palms moved slowly up and down her shoulders, trying to soothe the tremors running through her.
Vee shook her head. "I’m sorry."
"You have nothing to be sorry for."
"I’m sorry."
"Shhh..." He knew where this was going.
If he let her keep talking, she would start crying again, and once she started, there was every chance she would fall apart completely. She had already done enough of that.
So Luca kissed her.
Vee melted into him. "Hmmmm..." Her hands clutched at his shirt, pulling him closer.
Or as close as he could actually get. There was, after all, a tiny human between them now, which meant even their dramatic embraces had required some adjustment.
Luca’s hand moved around her waist.
The way she held on to him told him everything.
She needed him.
Luca knew this pattern well enough by now.
Whenever the world became too loud, whenever something hurt in a way she could not process, Vee reached for him. Sometimes she needed him to distract her until there was no room left in her head for anything else.
Tonight was one of those nights. It was not exactly an appropriate time. Then again, very little about their relationship had ever been particularly concerned with appropriate timing.
It was one of the darker corners of their love.
They had accepted that a long time ago.
There were moments when they used each other to escape whatever was hurting, when pleasure became distraction and intensity became a way to drown out everything they could not fix.
Healthy?
Probably debatable.
And neither of them would change it. In the middle of war, the peace they gave each other was the thing they always reached for.
It had been that way from the beginning. It had not changed. It probably never would.
Luca brushed his thumb over her cheek, wiping away the last wet trail beneath her eye. He reached behind him, found the door and turned the lock before turning back fully and stepping into her space. He lowered his head until his mouth was near her ear. "What do you want?" he asked.
"I need to feel the hurt only you can give me. This pain is too much."
"I can’t do much, love," Luca said, keeping his voice low. "You’re already fragile, and I’m not taking unnecessary risks with you."
Vee nodded, still pressed against him.
"But I need you to feel," he continued, brushing his thumb along her cheek. "Because after this, we need to make a decision that is going to change the rest of our lives. Ours and our child’s."
Vee nodded slowly. She trusted him.
Luca might push her, and occasionally make decisions that had her questioning his sanity, but when it came to matters that concerned her, she never doubted him. He pulled her closer, his hands catching the fabric of her dress around her shoulders and tugged it down roughly. The neckline slipped, exposing her breasts.
Pregnancy had changed them dramatically. They were fuller, heavier, sensitive to practically everything.
Luca cupped both breasts carefully, testing her reaction first. His palms supported their weight before his fingers tightened in a slow squeeze. He watched her face, reading every tiny change before increasing the pressure.
Then his fingers found her nipples.
He tugged hard.
Vee’s knees nearly gave way.
A sharp cry escaped her as pleasure and pain collided so quickly she could barely separate one from the other.
Her breasts were already sore.
That was the point.
She had asked him to make her feel something strong enough to compete with everything tearing through her head, and Luca understood exactly what she meant.
He gave her pleasure because that was something he knew how to give effortlessly, but he threaded pain through it too.
Pain was inevitable with a man like him.
"Harder," Vee whispered. "I can take it."
His mouth curved.
Always trying to prove something to him. Always insisting she was tougher than he thought, even though Luca had never doubted her strength for a second.
Luca pinched both nipples firmly.
Vee moaned, her head tipping back as the sensation shot through her.
He held the pressure for only a moment before releasing it and rubbing the aching skin gently with his thumbs.
The change from pain to tenderness made her shiver. Then he did it again. Until Vee stopped bracing herself against what was coming and started anticipating it instead.
He lowered his head as his lips brushed the warm skin above her breast.
Then he kissed his way down slowly, pausing between them for a moment before lifting one breast gently in his hand.
Vee shuddered.
Luca closed his mouth around the sensitive bud and rolled his tongue along it.
An obvious sigh of pleasure slipped from Vee’s lips.
Luca answered it with a sharp slap against her breast, followed immediately by the scrape of his teeth against the tender skin.
Her hands caught his shoulders for support.
He did it again.
The sting came first, then his palm moved over the same sensitive flesh, soothing what he had just awakened before his mouth followed.
Before long, faint impressions from his hands were scattered across her breasts, the skin flushed from his attention.
He had always liked leaving evidence of himself on his wife.
Luca turned her carefully and placed both of her hands flat against his desk.
Their options for positions were becoming fewer and fewer as the pregnancy progressed.
He stood behind Vee, making sure she was balanced. Then he caught the hem of her dress and pulled it up, bunching the fabric in one hand. His palm came down hard against her ass.
Vee whimpered.
Luca rubbed the same spot slowly, his palm travelling over the heat he had created. He struck her again.
Her fingers tightened against the edge of the desk.
Luca leaned forward until his chest settled against her back. His mouth found the sensitive place below her ear. "Stay with me," he murmured.
Vee nodded, her breathing unsteady.
His hand smoothed over the place he had struck, soothing the sting before another sharp slap landed.